(no subject)
I'm actually feeling a little down. Financial aid is tougher than I thought it would be and I feel like I'm morphing into one of those bad Cartoon Network twits (NICKELODEON ROCKS!) who have LITERALLY one-track minds and the dialogue makes you want to smash your head through a wall. It's just that I always thought I'd stay a free spirit. Embrace the bohemian dream. Live the life purged of numb3rs. I'd be very Winona Ryder in Reality Bites, totally clueless, completely broke but just deliriously happy because life's so textured and so amazing (and my boyfriend looks like Ethan Hawke). I'd have as many kids as I'd want, I'd take whichever job made me happiest, I'd marry the guy that might not have a cent to his name but makes Prince Charming look like a gas station attendant. And NOW, money's all I can think about. Can I upgrade my scholarship? Can I get a loan? Am I taking on work part-time? I mean, if Veronica Mars can get promoted from waitress to cafe manager in one summer WHILE she juggled murder mysteries and two boyfriends, I can too! OK, so the car fantasies are kind of the fun bonus to this all, especially since Mom has told me she'll buy me one when I get my liscence. I've been kind of thinking of either a cherry red Mini Cooper or a lime green Volkswagon Beetle (yes, like Mandy Moore's sugar to my heart, I'm craving). Maybe a Toyota Prius or a Vios. I know Master's will have to be night classes while I work full-time somewhere (Master's...bleargh... Who would've thought I'd have the work ethic? But apparently it's so necessary in the States). But then where on earth will I live? Will Mom let me live with her? Or would that be wearing out my welcome? It might be a little pathetic in the States to live at home at twenty-two, I don't know. I didn't think this through. I know it's going to be so worth it in the end (Katie Couric, better watch out) but right now I'm strangely disappointed in myself. I let myself turn into a caricature of an 'adult' in the 'real world.'
Who wants to watch X-MEN? Yeeeeeeeee!
EDIT: But then again in the ultra-cool, very intellectual book to read 'The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants' (hey, no making fun of me, you're ALL chicklit girls), it does quote Norman Mailer saying, "We must all grow up or pay more for remaining the same." Or something like that.
Who wants to watch X-MEN? Yeeeeeeeee!
EDIT: But then again in the ultra-cool, very intellectual book to read 'The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants' (hey, no making fun of me, you're ALL chicklit girls), it does quote Norman Mailer saying, "We must all grow up or pay more for remaining the same." Or something like that.