(no subject)
lately i feel that some really important decisions are going to be coming up. i dont feel that im ready...or adult enough, if you will, to make them.
i cant believe i graduate in may. school is going so fast. it terrifies me that im halfway done because i dont feel nearly ready enough to be doing this on my own without any kind of supervision. i love what i do, and i feel that im getting much better at it each day. i suppose i just get discouraged because i expected to walk in and be amazing at this right off the bat. totally unrealistic, i know, but im not used to working up to being great. most things that ive done in my life, ive been good at right away. im starting to realize that NO ONE is great right away in this industry. i hate it, but its a challenge. and anyone who knows me at all knows im always up for a good challenge.
im reading valley of the dolls. its held my interest so far. im only like, 100 pages into it.
im also struggling with my life after school. i know i have until may, but i want to be prepared. they tell us that we should actually be out job hunting right now. its hard to find places im interested in working at when i dont know where im going to live. weve talked about moving to boardman for a small amount of time just to get a feel for being on our own. weve also talked about pittsburgh and some of its surrounding cities. i cant make a decision, and im frustrated because i dont have the time to really go search around for places that i would be interested in living and working because im always at school, work, or the gym.
i hate money. thats because i have none.
i miss when things were simple and i was surrounded by people who didnt think they knew everything about me and didnt judge me. i miss my parents being together. i miss not being poor or having to worry about bills. i miss having time for myself every day. i miss just not giving a shit.
i cant believe i graduate in may. school is going so fast. it terrifies me that im halfway done because i dont feel nearly ready enough to be doing this on my own without any kind of supervision. i love what i do, and i feel that im getting much better at it each day. i suppose i just get discouraged because i expected to walk in and be amazing at this right off the bat. totally unrealistic, i know, but im not used to working up to being great. most things that ive done in my life, ive been good at right away. im starting to realize that NO ONE is great right away in this industry. i hate it, but its a challenge. and anyone who knows me at all knows im always up for a good challenge.
im reading valley of the dolls. its held my interest so far. im only like, 100 pages into it.
im also struggling with my life after school. i know i have until may, but i want to be prepared. they tell us that we should actually be out job hunting right now. its hard to find places im interested in working at when i dont know where im going to live. weve talked about moving to boardman for a small amount of time just to get a feel for being on our own. weve also talked about pittsburgh and some of its surrounding cities. i cant make a decision, and im frustrated because i dont have the time to really go search around for places that i would be interested in living and working because im always at school, work, or the gym.
i hate money. thats because i have none.
i miss when things were simple and i was surrounded by people who didnt think they knew everything about me and didnt judge me. i miss my parents being together. i miss not being poor or having to worry about bills. i miss having time for myself every day. i miss just not giving a shit.