(no subject)

[dye_me_thin]

i Just cant take it anymore. i stay home sick with a stomach ache for two days, and im on the phone with my mo and ask her what i should do. she says "stop making yourself sick and you wont have this fucking problem will you?" to add insult to injury, she calls in the middle of a purge. i finished purging, and cried, and cried, and smoked a cigarette, and cried. maybe i should get help, but im so close. i hate this, she knows, but she doesn't do anything about it, but i know she hates it, and i know she wants it gone. what the fuck, where the hell do i go from here. My life is...bulimia...is my death. my peace and war, my up and down, my tool and my imperfection.
fuck it, im still going to be me, and im going to stay strong. reguardless of out come.