(no subject)
hi journal! it's been a long time. I'm up at villanova and things are going great. except for with mike. i don't think he loves me anymore and i'm doubtful about his fidelity towards me. i asked him if i could come down and stay with him for my fall break in october (which happens to be 10 days) and he doesn't even want me to stay with him...i don't know what to do. i'm so lonely here and all i want to do is see my baby, but he doesn't even want to see me. i'm so depressed about it. i just don't know what to do...i don't know what i did worng to deserve this type of torture. he's so mean to me now...like he doesn't even care about me. i mean, i thought i knew him...he was so sweet and caring and i thought he was the most perfect person alive. i think he might be hooking up with someone though. i'm so retarted. i should have known better and i wish i actually had friends that i could talk to that could understand me. now im just stuck in a rut. i can't break up with him because i'm so in love with him. i know it would probably be the best thing to do, but i can't...i'm so pathetic. i just need someone to be there for me right now, and he's the only person i have...escept i don't really have him. i feel like he hates me and just wouldn't care if he ever saw me again. i'm so distraught...