Resident Evil Degeneration
Yeah, Resident Evil Degeneration. One thing that certainly degenerated after watching this piece of animated crap was my IQ. Seriously, I've so had it with frikkin' zombie movies. It's the same tired shit every goddamn fucking time. People being stupid and getting killed by oh so deadly opponents, the avoidance of which would literally be a no-brainer. Seriously, how hard can it be to handle slow-moving humanoids with the reaction times of a 90-year old with a heart attack?
Gawds, and not only does this waste of time feature wooden animation that makes it look like one drawn-out PS2 sequence, but also a woman SWAT officer who, while facing zombies who proliferate through biting people, wears neither a helmet with a visor nor gloves nor even zips up her vest to cover her neck. And when she is faced with the first attack, she doesn't shoot on sight but instead hesitates and almost cries. I've so had it with women being depicted as inefficient wimps ruled by their emotions and lacking any sort of rational thought processes. Yeah, I know, there's more than just some truth to this, but I've already had enough of that shit in real life. In the movies, I wanna see goddamn warrior queens wading through armies of enemies like a frikkin' liger on speed. But noooo, we only get police officer Barbie crying because she broke a fingernail.
And then you have a scene in which the survivors of the carnage have to get out of an airport and choose to escape through the lobby. But not with any kind of tactical formation or general strategy, no, they just run for it, madly shooting about and then wondering why, amid the naturally ensuing chaos, things don't go as planned.
And once the massive retardation that was the airport sequence is finally over, an entirely new dimension of boredom openend up to me. Gawds, and I thought [rec] was boring. Impossibly dumb dialogues coupled with utterly unconvincing emotionality and blaringly obvious orchestral music made this thing a real pain to watch. Want an example? Here's a real jewel of wisdom handed down from one elder brother to his police sister: "If you don't try to save a life, you'll never save any." Whoa, yeah, a real pearl, I know. The rest of the dialogues are similarly idiotic.
Anyways, after a long period of slow cerebral death, this twisted parody of a plot awakens and shit starts coming down, only in a retarded way (again). I'll spare you the agonizing details, but it is all topped off by an entire squad of soldiers opening fire on the endboss without seriously injuring him, while the protagonist leisurely manages to stab its giant eyeball with a knife and wounds it. And while the emptying of a dozen rifle magazines didn't do shit to the monster while it still had a human head, it's immediately put down with a single pistol bullet through its heavily armored skull, again by the protagonist. *That's* the level of utter bullshit you're dealing with in this movie.
Overall, this was nothing but your run-of-the-mill Japano-movie crapfest, but even worse than Advent Children and if this is the kind of movie today's audience not only consumes, but actually likes, this whole planet must be incinerated for the greater good.
There is absolutely nothing good about this whole movie, so behold the unholy glory that is
0/10 points.