HI WEEPINGCOCKIANS. GLAD YOU JOINED ME ON THIS TRAIN TO INSANITY.
So the voters have decided: Cap the meetings. God it's like you guys don't want porn or something. Well buckle in because you don't get any porn until you meet all the characters.
Let's turn to the back cover of this game. They have a warning that's obligatory for hentai games, but the wording is what I find interesting.
If this is for mature adults, what am I doing playing this game? Also.
Well anyway, let's see how Mikan, Asshole, and Snatchbag are doing. Surely this won't get awkward.
Asshole is enjoying a good night's sleep when...
Oh hi God.
"It's great and all but HOW DO YOU TURN IT OFF." (Oh god that question gets answered and I'm dreading it D:)
Wait, "My Lord?" This all makes sense.
See, this cap looks normal. But after numerous studies of this image my top hentai scientists came to two conclusions.
1. They were really fucking high and had no idea how they got into my house.
2. The cat is fucking Voldemort.
Don't believe me? THE PROOF.
AW SHIT SON.
This is word for word what I want to say to Jesus when I die. Thank you Let's Meow Meow.
Are You Afraid of the Cat God?
The cat god asks if you got the "gift" alright. Then you question if this is the real life or is it just fantasy. Caught in a blowjob no escape from insanity.
Leaving Queen out of this because they're too class for this, Asshole recounts his awkward blowjob the night before.
That was my reaction to the ending of Final Fantasy X.
Okay, guys reading this: Would you be able to tell if you blowjob you recieved was a dream or not?
So there's an astral beaurocracy? Well I guess they would need it for all those astral marriages to Sephiroth and Loki or something.
The cat god said there was a little hitch but don't worry. You naturally worry.
This doesn't help.
Asshole mopes over the fact it was a dream until...
RAMPANT LESBIANISM WAKES HIM FROM HIS SLUMBER.
I'm fuckin' with you. I left out all the parts about cooking. I thought it was funny.
KITCHEN LESBIANISM.
Nah, it's just the naked catgirl from last night spontaneously grew a maid uniform and is now cooking with your childhood friend that taught her how to give you a blow job. BUSINESS AS USUAL.
Asshole realizes this isn't a dream and then.... rubs his stubble on his new sex slave?
I'm not even fucking kidding, I'm just confused.
Just in case you forgot the token tsundere was there.
TRIAL OF THE DRAGONNNNNN IT'S TOO FUCKING EARLY FOR JOY
Man I wish my neighbors manhandled me into basic hygiene.
THE FIRST LEGITIMATELY GOOD QUESTION ASSHOLE HAS ASKED.
For Christ's sake you're in a hentai not Project fucking Runway.
That's what gets your attention. Not the fact your new pet catgirl sewed an elaborate outfit in mere hours, but the fact she doesn't have panties.
Knowing Asshole is a perv he's probably not gonna fix this.
My college had a box of free clothing people could just dump off clothes they didn't want anymore and someone else could take it. Every once in a while we'd find panties in there and ask "who the hell would take second-hand panties?"
That question has sadly been answered.
Yes. Your first plot arc is buying panties. I indirectly gave the guys who wrote this bullshit money and I feel deep shame.
It's fucking Japan.
You have Japanese Walmarts. Where the hell are you shopping?
Oh look! The first of only 12 choices you get to make in the game! This is a decision I couldn't make myself so I had to enlist help! He chose the obvious one which is "new panties." Because seriously, I don't want to risk yeast infections in my hentai game.
I get the feeling Asshole has no problem with that.
WHAT DID I JUST SAY LET'S MEOW MEOW.
Excitedly; I am aroused. Seductively; Show me again.
Choo choo! Here comes the Convenient Handwavey Coincidence Train!
Oh bullshit, Snatchbag. The homeowner's manual said NOTHING about interdimensional horny catgirls!
Snatchbag relents and lets Mikan live with you provided you don't cause any trouble. With your penis. Can't make any promises.
What the hell, Snatchbag this isn't fucking summer camp. This shit's co-ed!
Sure we're in school and have jobs, but getting panties for my magical catgirl is DEFINITELY on my top list of priorities!
Tune in next time when we -sigh- go shopping for panties. Christ.