if i didn't have you

[duskynoir]

my job is entirely pointless these days. sometimes i wonder why they keep me here at all, ha. i used to really enjoy putting up the icicle lights and snowflakes and even that has been delegated to someone else. that's fine. i'll sit here and keep the chair warm while i hunt for xmas gifts and pay my bills online. hey, i even found an urgent care on the way home that's open until 9pm. score.
i had more dreams about hotels and hotel rooms last night. weird. i've got our free night stay on the brain. heh.
i stood in the hallway half asleep staring at our xmas tree this morning. it took everything out of me to wander into the bathroom and throw myself into the shower. i just want to stay home and cuddle under the warm glow of christmas lights. if only i could fast-forward to winter break... ugh. soon enough.
i think i'm starting the shed the anxiety of everything. what can you do, really? just keep on... don't let it kill me. there are far more happier things going on to let my stupid job take me over. bar hopping on monday nights and tipsy giggles... as long as i get to hold you close and feel your toes find mine beneath the blankeys i really don't need anything else. sometimes i lose sight of the good things that i have. no more of that. i love you jimmy bell <3