what am i going to do??!?
!UGH i JUST NEE TO VENT!
ok.. so as of this past week.. ive come to the conclusion that ive officialy lost one of
the greatest guys in my life! and it heartbreaking.. well hes been out of my life for about
2 months now.. but those 2 months were the worst! ive come to find out that i like
this guy so much! i can't stop thinking about him.. when im around him (which is rare)
i get all sad.. looking at pictures and talking about old times drives me crazy.. i know
things wont ever be the same and i wish i could go back in time to sept. but i cant and
i hate that!! i like him so much.. and i fucked it all up.. i wish god would bless me with
another chance with him.. b/c i would do anything to be with him again!.. you know..
it very hard b/c ive had a crush on him since 8th grade! im blessed that i even got a
chance to be with him.. which was a short time.. i wish i was with him now.. it breaks
my heart to know ill never have that chance again.. i know being jsut friends with him
wont ever be enough.. and im all upset over it.. the truth is.. last nite was the 1st nite
i had talked to him in 3 months.. and as i walked away i started to cry! i hate this. i
hate feeling like this! i want him back so bad?.. but theres no way.. theres no way he
would ever know how i feel again.. i jsut pray things will work out!.....
--- but i just had to let that all out.. b/c ive been wanting to say that for 3 months now!
and its killing me!.. so i hope everything works out..
happy new year..(maybe mine will start off good)