If I was to invent a society changing device I would follow it up with a snack cake
Living life without similes would be an interesting prospect. Though for reasons unknow metaphors are fair game. Weird. And now for things involving cats. Unyielding to the snowbanks of hell, pressing on to find the forthright thing needed to consume. She just stood there though blank stare and call in all honesty there wasn't even a reason to be standing. The thousands of chairs around us said so in unison. I guess thats what you would call stubborn. To her though it wasn't death it was simply a rejoining of cells. Breathlessly explaining why she would get out of the coffin at her own wake. I guess she felt it was time to rejoin theliving despite the two very large holes in her lungs. It wasn't her fault really so I guess the continuity was ruined. We sat for a cup of coffee and we all made her dress in rubber due to the fact that her previously rotting body was quite ripe. We assumed that the cells were refiring ad her enzymes would do the trick shortly. We hoped. I wish this had all been strange but due to my own love for her I found it difficult to shut her out just for being previously deceased. I guess the only thing that bothered me was how well she told jokes. This was odd due to her horrible timing when she was among the living couldn't tell a joke to save her life. Apparently Death, IS funny. Go figure. Here I thought somber was the order of the day not jokes about jews walking into bars and discussing plantetary evolution with gentiles. For the record the punchline involved haggis and an unaturally short ear of corn. I didn't quite get it but my philosopher friend thought it was quite funny. Later that evening after the clamor had died down we sat staring at each other crying. Well I think she was crying but her tear ducts had yet to be properly reactivated and her sodium levels were low due to her lack of blood. I had missed her greatly when she was away and I found that I missed her more now. After about 17 hours of this we decided to celebrate her newly activated life by going to a play. If was a fairly stupid "abstract" play something about how former child stars hould get jobs in abstract plays about child stars. I didn't find it very amusing until I realized it was a clever ploy to get work by hiring each other and have cocaine fueled 4 ways on rubber mats on stage. Those clever washed up actors. Last week one of the kids from an 80s show tried to get a "joy" tax from me for the hours of entertainment his tagline of "Oh you crazy self involved war hero" but I had to be honest with him and tell him that his sister was much funnier when she combed his hair out and painted his head to look like a daisy. I'm fairly sure he should be suing Ann Geddes right about now. But the story of me and my formerly dead love continues. I suppose right now a tastless joke about her arms falling off during intercourse should be insterted here but really it was only a thumb. We reattached it though and all was well. SHes recovering nicely from death to be honest her skin is getting a bit more color seeing as we removed all that crazy embalming fluid. Shes a big hit at funerals now. She does a stand up routine during that portion when they lower the casket and everyone is saying nice words. I only wish she was invited I guess shes been kicked out of about 50 funerals for tap dacing as the casket is lowered and questioning the priests sexuality. Oh well things are getting better by the day :)