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Good question.
Why am I here? Where's my motivation? What happened to going to class because I like physics, I like math, I like computers, I like to learn ( Read more... )
Why am I here? Where's my motivation? What happened to going to class because I like physics, I like math, I like computers, I like to learn ( Read more... )
Maybe a better question to ask sometime (as far as are you doing plays because of Liz or anything else) is... does the answer matter? Does it make it inherently "bad" if you are choosing one thing because of someone else, or does it just make it "bad" in our society where you are supposed to be yourself and only yourself (whatever "being yourself" actually means)
I am mostly speaking from a lot of personal experience, I guess... but I know that sometimes decisions I've made because of someone outside of me have terrified the HELL out of me... not because they are inherently bad decisions, but because I'm afraid if some people knew the reasons they would be like "WTF!!? No, seriously, WTF?!"
And maybe the really scary thing is that if the decision DOESN'T work out for some reason (if you go to the play and you HATE it or something hORRIBLE happens)... a gut reaction might be to sort of blame the other person or at least your relationship with the other person, which can breed resentment on some level. Or to think back and be like "if only I did X"... when like you mentioned about your ex, you still made the decision in the end, for whatever reason...
And if the decision you make feels right when you are making it - I don't think you can blame anyone or anything - not even your self - if it goes wrong. Every second something is changing the way that everything else will go... so it's notj ust about the decisions you make, it's everything else that happens
Blah... I'm babbling and I don't know if this makes sense to you at all... ignore it if it doesn't or if it doesn't fit... but that's what came to mind :-P
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I guess that's a good point. Does the answer matter in itself or only because I'm afraid of other people's reaction to whatever degree?
I don't know. I guess everyone makes bad decisions, but those decisions are still yours. You always have a choice, even if the choice isn't one you like. If something comes out wrong, you still have to own that decision and deal with the consequences and understand that it may not have anything to do with the decision(s) you made except in the sense that every action and decision is connected in some way.
Now I'm the one babbling. But it did make sense and thank you.
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