Apr 07, 2007 00:27
if it comes down to it...im not fighting for this...i give up...i'm sure it'd be worth it...but i dunt have it in me anymore...why bother? so you can jab me a little more? i won't be your whore...but i'll ruin this for you...because i'm selfish...and why should scum like you get to be happy? i hope that she breaks your heart..i hope this ends before it even can begin...why am i so resentful? because you were supposed to be mine...you weren't supposed to date anyone...
a part of me wants to grab hold of myself and shake this negativity out of me...i want to be stable...and i want to tell myself it isn't the end of the world which i know it isn't...but i jes feel my heart breaking...i don't want to know ANYTHING about her...but i do...i don't want to know her age...what her name is...where they go but i do and i'm tired of this...i don't need this...
but my heart jes wants me to break...because i feel thats what im doing at this sort of late hour...in a few days i'll be somewhat sane again..i won't feel so bad...i won't want to die where i am...perhaps it'll heal itself...but right now im tired...
god i hate her