FREE ASSOCIATION ENTRY

[dulcemayo]

whoa i dont think that paid account option was there before fuck it just went away and this is supposed to be my free association entry but i would normally delete that because now it doesnt make any sense my roommate's playing wilco again but i'm sort of getting sick of it but it could be a lot worse so i at least it's a band i used to like. i wrote my aunt and uncle earlier, it was a really long letter, the thought passed through my head that i shouldnt make it so long because then they'll feel obligated to write back a really long letter but obviously i did not. arrr i need to think faster for this. last night we watched frida again and this time i LOVED it while the other times it was pretty and interesting but this time oh man i want to be her. i've never really experienced a lot of physical pain. last summer the night i came home i was doubled over in back pain and it hurt when i peed and i was nauseous and i had unidentifiable itchy bumps on me and i HATED it, but damn, it could have been one of the most painful times in my life. and i think about that when i pee sometimes, that right after the uti i was so GRATEFUL every time i peed because it didnt hurt. and now of course i dont, its pretty hard to be grateful for everything but i dont really know why. not in the mood? i'm cheating a little now. ok i'll try to stop it. my arms are actually getting a little tired. you should try this too it is interesting. the only other time i did it was in the unitarian youth group meeting, but i think i cheated then too.

well i couldnt think of anything else to write so that was a pretty big gap, maybe i should stop now. actually i was thinking of something else but thought i shouldnt write it and i guess thats when the lj entries break down- when you cant be honest because it become somewhat clear then that real journal entries are for honesty and lj entries are for ego boosts/petty entertainment.