Purple Rain Chapter 10
Hello Dahlings!
I had uploaded the next chapter then something happened. I am so sorry the initial message I wrote was much more eloquent than whatever I am typing now.
It was my birthday yesterday, so yay me! The chapter update took a while because I needed my beta to approve it first. Thank god I waited because her edit makes it a much better chapter.
This chapter is called the Other Side because like everyone knows there are so many different sides you see once you start living with someone. Some good, some not so bad. I wrote this chapter over a month ago, when I was still buzzed about the OTP in Season 5. Internet forays into the realm of spoilers have shown me I have been very foolish as the OTP is pretty much wrecked. GRR.
The chapter after this one is relatively light by the way, so if you're looking for some OTP goodness I hope I am delivering. xx Dulce
SPOILER WARNING: There are some spoilers for Weeds Season 4 as our couple have a conversation about it.
Chapter 10 - Purple Rain
Robin sat on the subway and watched a young fashionable couple with matching bright green and purple beanie hats flirting and teasing each other. The pair was so oblivious to their surroundings, completely wrapped up in themselves. Her instinct was to snort contemptuously and turn away but for some reason she kept on watching them.
She realized that she envied them their closeness and their total willingness to leave themselves open to the other person. Like Marshall and Lily. She wondered if she would ever have someone she could let herself love and never fear that they would break her heart or dump her. Then she heard Barney telling her he loved her in their bathroom shower stall and felt an involuntary shiver snake its way down her spine.
She had been so careful to mentally walk around that landmine, forcefully slamming the door on any flights of fancy that would make her think about Barney’s declaration or her own admission right after it.
The young couple leaned in for a long kiss, when they pulled away they gazed into each other’s eyes grinning goofily. Oh God, who they were kidding? Within a year their so-called love would be so over! Just like Barney’s impression that he was in love with her would be too… right?
She frowned, it was not possible that Barney Stinson Man Whore Extraordinaire was really and truly in love with her was it? I mean, yes she understood that they had been spending a lot of time together since his accident last summer when she had visited him every day. They had watched hours of great and not-so great TV together, she had fed him his meals when he was incapacitated, played board games and just generally kept him company because a part of her felt guilty that he was in that situation. I mean if everyone was going to be honest it was because of her selfish actions that night they first slept together that he’d been hit by the bus. And if Robin was going to be honest with herself, it was also because she had just wanted to spend time with him, drawn to the pale figure with a brave face and a shaky smile that reminded her so much of herself at times.
Okay so there was last summer when Barney had been physically vulnerable, and then when she got back from Japan when he had been ready, willing and oh so very able to chase away her unemployment blues with a good screw. Crude but true, that’s what it had been…, at first, but then that day in Robin’s room something had changed and it had remained changed. It was as if they had been having sex in 2-D at first then it had evolved to 3-D, then surround-sound, THX, High Def, the hills are alive kind of thing. And they had gotten married.
Robin paused to analyze her thoughts objectively; weirded out as she may be about the fact that she was legally somebody’s wife and not just somebody but Barney’s, their wedding had not only been awesome but legen-fucking-dary. Nobody and nothing could change that. Okay, so she refused to look back on that day in the AC as anything but good, clean Bro fun with a twist. She shrugged, okay…
So what was the problem? Other than how it would mess up the group dynamic beyond repair and alienate Ted from her forever more? Hmm… how about the fact that she was not in love with Barney Stinson? Granted she had feelings for him but were those feelings of guilt from last year, gratitude for him saving her from banishment to the Great White North… she did not just think that did she? And misplaced appreciation for the stellar performance he executed every single time in the sack? It also didn’t help that Barney had been letting Robin see more of him than he normally allowed which had her all intrigued and drawn to him. This was exactly her problem, she was so confused!
Robin’s stop arrived and she got up, the lovey dovey couple got up too, holding hands they stepped off the train and walked in front of Robin towards the turnstiles. She saw them pull out teenager subway passes and sighed in relief. They were teenagers! That explained everything. Well in that case she gave them until summer vacation. He would meet someone else on the beach in Florida or California and she would hook up with an older guy in the City while she worked at the Gap or Starbucks. She mentally chastised herself for being taken in by a teenage couple.
Walking out into the bright albeit chilly Manhattan air she dug her hands into her pockets and smiled at herself in self-deprecation. Silly Robin.
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Five days after her talk with Lily, Robin came home from a lunch date with some old friends to find Barney watching TV in his bedroom. He was in bed, wearing sweats, drinking beer and munching on popcorn.
“Hey! When did you get back? And you’re wearing sweats!”
Barney smiled at her in greeting and waved her in, “This is good stuff, I Tivod ‘Weeds’ Season 4 last year and I am only just getting round to watching it.”
Robin approached the bed then turned to look at the screen, Nancy Botwin had a gun pulled on Celia in a garage, then she pistol-whipped Celia in the face with it.
“OH! That’s gotta hurt!” Barney whooped.
Robin smiled and taking her coat off, crawled onto the bed, sitting close to Barney with her back against the headboard.
“Oh this is good, I missed this episode and the ones after it too,” Robin said as she fidgeted a little to get comfortable.
Barney was chuckling at what was going on the screen but he reached down and handed Robin a beer, twisting the cap off for her then handing it over. Robin accepted the beverage she clinked her bottle with his before taking a sip. Within minutes they were sharing the popcorn and yelling out in amusement at the antics on screen.
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“So what’d you think?” Barney asked her when their ‘Weeds’ marathon had ended.
“Hmm… it was good, actually it had some really great shit in there but nothing can top seasons 2 and 3 for me.”
Barney mulled this for a second then nodded, “I agree, but you gotta admit Andy being in love with Nancy was a total what the ‘f’ moment, I did not see that coming.”
“I did.”
“No you didn’t.”
“Of course I did… woman’s intuition.”
Robin mentally winced as she remembered what Barney had said to her just last week. But this was different, Nancy and Andy were fictional characters and if she was going to be honest with herself maybe she had had an inkling about his feelings for her for a while. Where the Hell had that admission come from!?
“Oh really?” Barney’s scepticism was ill-concealed.
He couldn’t help but think she had seemed to be quite clueless about his feelings for her until he had just come out and said it last week.
Robin turned to him and whacked him on the arm, “Yes, really!”
“Huh, you decided what you wanna order?”
“I’m feeling Vietnamese food, there’s a great place a couple blocks east of here,” Robin suggested.
Barney made a face, “Do they deliver because I don’t feel like leaving the apartment. I’ve got terrible jet-lag, I mean look at me I’m wearing sweats.”
“Oh my God, yeah, how was your trip?”
Barney shrugged in a non-committal answer. Robin took that to mean she should not probe anymore so she dropped the subject.
“The Vietnamese place does do deliveries in a five mile radius only so we’re covered.”
“Well great so call them!” Barney handed Robin his i-Phone, then climbed off the bed.
“Wait what do you want?”
“Anything that’s not too spicy and no fish or pork,” Barney said over his shoulder as he padded over to the bathroom.
Robin’s call went through and she placed their order. When Barney came back he walked up to his dresser and picked up a bag that was sitting there. Turning over to Robin who had hung up the phone he shook the bag at her.
“I brought you something from the Duty Free.”
Her face lit up, “Oh what is it?”
Barney handed her the bag and sat back down on the bed, picking up the remote he started to search through his Tivo programs, while Robin dumped the contents of the bag on the bed.
“Vanilla flavoured cigarillos! Awesome! Ooh and Johnny Walker miniature collection set! Dior Addict eau de parfum gift set, wow Barney this is amazing… thank you!”
Barney inclined his head in acknowledgment. Robin was opening the cigarillos, she took one out and sniffed it appreciatively. Taking another one out she handed it to Barney and cast around looking for a lighter. Barney reached over to his bedside table and opening the top drawer, took out a red sombrero ashtray and silver Zippo. He leaned over and lit her cigarillo for her before lighting his. Robin took her first puff and exhaled happily.
“Ahh… this is the good stuff.”
Barney chuckled, puffing on his own and blowing rings out.
“So what’d you do all week?”
“Oh not much met up with Lily for coffee on Monday, went to the bar, watched the news, talked to my Mom, went out for lunch with your brother-in-law, Tom yesterday, had lunch with friends today, that’s where I was coming from actually.”
Barney got up and opened his French windows in order to let the cigarillo smoke out. He came back to the bed and sat down again.
“It’s a good thing you go to work soon; you’re becoming a Lady Who Lunches! And lunch with Tom huh? You guys didn’t happen to meet so you could discuss how to be beat the two awesomest guys in the world at pool did you?”
“Sunday was a fluke and it doesn’t count because Ralph accidentally whacked me in the ankle with that blasted hockey stick I gave him! If that hadn’t happened I would never have sank the black ball.”
“Uh huh… so what about the other two games James and I beat you guys at?”
“Lucky break… in our re-match you guys are gonna crash and burn!” Robin threatened.
Barney just shook his head good-naturedly, “If you two conservative gun-nuts wanna tell yourselves that go ahead.”
Robin elbowed him sharply in the ribs and he laughed. She looked down at the gifts laid out in front of her and picked up the perfume set.
“Hey, how’d you know that this was my perfume when we were in the AC?”
“Come on Scherbatsky, I’m Barney, awesome incarnated, you think I wouldn’t know something so simple as what perfume you wear?” he scoffed.
Robin shook her head, “Well I guess I have a few more awesome skills I need to hone then.”
“True story Canada, we’re working on the nationality thing but we’ve gotta give you some lessons in some of the fundamentals you missed out on in that Northern jungle.”
Robin blew smoke in his face and he burst out laughing. She appraised him coolly even though her lips were twitching in mirth.
The doorbell rang and Barney jumped up picking up his wallet, “I’ll get this.”
Robin watched him go and took one last puff of her cigar before putting it out. She hadn’t realized just how much she had missed him until she had seen him again. Trailing into the living room she was just in time to see Barney shut the door on the delivery guy.
Barney walked over to the counter and spread their take out there so they could sit on the bar stools and eat.
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“You’ve got all of ‘The Wire’ on your Tivo?” Robin asked as she cleared their takeout cartons.
“No just the last two seasons, I love that show so much I can’t bring myself to delete them.”
“Even though you have the complete DVD box set?”
“Yes, Ms. Reporter even though I’ve got the DVD box set.”
Robin started laughing, “Do you remember when I used to visit you at the hospital and we’d watch it in your room?”
“Yeah and that male nurse who had a thing for you would always barge into my room when someone was fucking or getting got!”
“Seriously though, we literally watched every HBO show ever last summer.”
Barney held his hand up, “Except for ‘Carnivale’ and that was because a certain someone is scared of the circus.”
“It’s full of freaks, doing weird freaky shit and not the good kind of weird but the fucked up kind that gives you nightmares for days. Then there are the clowns with their scarlet red permagrins, ugh. I can’t believe I found the circus cool when I was a kid!” Robin objected.
They were facing each other across the counter, faces flushed and eyes twinkling merrily.
“You are so Canadian.”
“I’m not offended.”
“Then I’m saying it wrong.”
Robin threw a napkin at him; he ducked it easily and made a face at her. She chased him around the counter and whacked him on the head with a roll of paper towels she had been holding. Barney brought his hands up to defend himself, laughing at her as he made a beeline for his room. Robin did not let up; following him she shoved him onto the bed and straddled him, still whacking him with the roll. Barney brought his hands up to catch her arms, Robin struggled to free herself.
“Why don’t we take our pants off and you can do that some more Scherbatsky?”
She stopped what she was doing and looked down at him; he released her arms and brought his hands to rest on her waist. They searched each other’s eyes and satisfied with what they saw they lunged for each other at the same time.
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“We should have done that as soon as you got home,” Barney whispered huskily.
They were lying in his bed together, both staring up at the ceiling. Robin shivered and Barney turned to look at her.
“Sorry, I should have closed those windows earlier, let me go turn the heat up.”
Robin shook her head, inching closer until she had wrapped herself around him.
“This way will be faster.”
Barney’s hands reflexively held her closer, skimming vague circles on her back.
“Okay but if you wake up Barnacle Jr. you’ll have to put him down again.”
“I really hope I do.” Robin smirked.
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They had sex a couple more times and then they fell asleep. Neither one of them had meant to fall asleep but it had just happened.
Robin looked around the dark room and wondered what had woken her. Then Barney mumbled something in his sleep again, twitching sporadically. Somehow she had ended up on the far side of the bed so she scooted closer to him. He was having a bad dream that much she could tell from the beads of sweat on his forehead and the erratic fluttering of his eyelids. His entire body was tightly poised as if he was fending off some attack or getting ready to spring. She called his name softly a couple of times but that only seemed to be agitating him further.
She decided to shake him and see if that would wake him. Laying a firm hand on his shoulder she tensed her grip because his skin was damp with sweat and his right hand shot out and grabbed her neck, cutting off her oxygen supply surprisingly fast. He shoved her against the headboard and rolled on top of her, still throttling her. She slapped him across the face and he flinched, not relinquishing his hold completely but loosening it slightly.
“Ba- ba- aarney it’s Robin!” she choked out, frantically making use of the slight relax in grip, her fingers clawing at the hand on her throat. She curled her left hand into a fist and was poised to punch him as hard as she could.
His eyes opened and after registering who she was he let her go instantaneously. She gasped and wheezed trying to breathe in as much precious air as she could. Barney turned on the bedside lamp and vaulting off the bed he ran over to his mini-fridge, taking out a bottle of mineral water he wrenched the cap off and approached Robin. He held the bottle out to her and when she had stopped wheezing and coughing violently she took the water, gulping it down. Barney took the bottle away from her.
“Slowly and only small sips Scherbatsky.”
She nodded in understanding and took the water from him, drinking it like he said.
“I’m sooo sorry…Are you okay? I didn’t know where I was, I thought I was still... on my trip. Here let me take a look at your neck.” Barney tilted her head back and assessed the finger shaped bruises already blooming like reddish purple ink stains on chromatography paper.
He got up and went in to the bathroom, Robin heard the faucet running. She gingerly explored her neck wondering what the Hell kind of trip Barney had been on to make him react like that in his sleep. He came back and gently pressed a cold wash-cloth to her neck. She covered his hand with hers and wouldn’t let him slide his hand away.
“Thanks,” she croaked.
Barney’s face contorted in pain. Robin raised her other hand and stroked his arm in a soothing up and down motion; her eyes softening in sympathy.
“It’s not as bad as it sounds or looks, honest. Are you okay?” she rasped.
“No! No I’m not, Robin I hurt you.”
She shrugged, “That’s what I get for breaking the rules and staying in your bed when I was supposed to be long gone.”
She cracked a smile to show him she was joking but he didn’t respond in kind. She surrendered his hand and he dropped it immediately. The wash-cloth started to fall but she caught it, continuing to press it on her swelling flesh.
“Oh come on Stinson, I’m Canadian, when we play hockey we get at least one hockey stick and two elbows to the neck, a black eye and broken bone per game. I’ll be fine by morning,” she explained in her most patient voice.
Barney’s eyes were very troubled as he watched her. His attitude combined with the raw ache in her throat irked her, it wasn’t a big deal, well it kind of was, but she wasn’t upset with him so why was he looking at her like a sick puppy.
“Stop being such a woman about this, I’m not made of glass, fuck you very much,” she snapped, throwing the covers back so she could get out of the bed.
That did make Barney chuckle and he grabbed her; dragging her onto his lap and holding her close.
“Alright, jeez! I get it you’re a tough cookie! Now let me take a look at the bruising before I go and tuck you into your own bed.”
Robin pulled the towel away and Barney noticed that the swelling was not so bad, he told her so and she rolled her eyes in exasperation. Chuckling he picked her up and carried her to her bed. They were both naked.
After he forced Robin to wear her pyjamas, Barney tucked her in, placing another cold compress to her neck.
“Okay, I’m gonna make sure you’re asleep before I get back to bed so, you’re tired and I’m tired… I think its time I told you one of my legendary bedtime stories.”
Robin perked up at this, burrowing in her covers, she watched him as he sat on the bed, back to the headboard, on top of her blankets. He covered his nudity with her soft purple and pink blanket. The feminine article looked incongruous in contrast to his golden-tanned muscles. In fact it served to emphasize his masculinity and reminded Robin of the strength she had not known he possessed until he’d wrapped a hand around her neck. She must be crazy but she found him on the bed with her girly blanket on his lap a turn on, she wanted to protest his refusal to get under the covers with her but she could tell he would not agree to getting in there with her after what had just happened. Damn men and their misplaced chivalry.
“I’m ready,” she prompted.
Barney looked down at her indulgently and stroked her hair back absentmindedly.
“Ah…now which story should I tell?”
“The longest, dirtiest most exciting one,” Robin rasped.
“Unh-uh, don’t be greedy pick one; longest or dirtiest, all of them are exciting so that’s not a separate category.”
Robin smiled, “Longest.”
Barney frowned thoughtfully, “Really? You surprise me Scherbatsky I so thought you’d go for dirtiest.”
“Tell the story Barney.”
“Okay, okay but public disclaimer, any sexual urges you may develop during the telling of this story are purely natural and should you feel a certain wet warmth in your nether regions like many of the fictional characters in my story this is a welcome reaction but purely coincidental, we do however, encourage you to feel free to show and tell.”
Robin smacked his thigh smartly, “You’re unbelievable.”
“Funny you should say that ‘cause that’s the very first line the heroine says to the hero!”
Robin rolled her eyes.
“Now this story has three protagonists, Roberta, Leila and Bartacus, Barry for short. We begin with Roberta and Leila who were playing ‘Doctors without Borders’ in Bartacus’ field-”
“Oh brother,” Robin groaned.
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I had uploaded the next chapter then something happened. I am so sorry the initial message I wrote was much more eloquent than whatever I am typing now.
It was my birthday yesterday, so yay me! The chapter update took a while because I needed my beta to approve it first. Thank god I waited because her edit makes it a much better chapter.
This chapter is called the Other Side because like everyone knows there are so many different sides you see once you start living with someone. Some good, some not so bad. I wrote this chapter over a month ago, when I was still buzzed about the OTP in Season 5. Internet forays into the realm of spoilers have shown me I have been very foolish as the OTP is pretty much wrecked. GRR.
The chapter after this one is relatively light by the way, so if you're looking for some OTP goodness I hope I am delivering. xx Dulce
SPOILER WARNING: There are some spoilers for Weeds Season 4 as our couple have a conversation about it.
Chapter 10 - Purple Rain
Robin sat on the subway and watched a young fashionable couple with matching bright green and purple beanie hats flirting and teasing each other. The pair was so oblivious to their surroundings, completely wrapped up in themselves. Her instinct was to snort contemptuously and turn away but for some reason she kept on watching them.
She realized that she envied them their closeness and their total willingness to leave themselves open to the other person. Like Marshall and Lily. She wondered if she would ever have someone she could let herself love and never fear that they would break her heart or dump her. Then she heard Barney telling her he loved her in their bathroom shower stall and felt an involuntary shiver snake its way down her spine.
She had been so careful to mentally walk around that landmine, forcefully slamming the door on any flights of fancy that would make her think about Barney’s declaration or her own admission right after it.
The young couple leaned in for a long kiss, when they pulled away they gazed into each other’s eyes grinning goofily. Oh God, who they were kidding? Within a year their so-called love would be so over! Just like Barney’s impression that he was in love with her would be too… right?
She frowned, it was not possible that Barney Stinson Man Whore Extraordinaire was really and truly in love with her was it? I mean, yes she understood that they had been spending a lot of time together since his accident last summer when she had visited him every day. They had watched hours of great and not-so great TV together, she had fed him his meals when he was incapacitated, played board games and just generally kept him company because a part of her felt guilty that he was in that situation. I mean if everyone was going to be honest it was because of her selfish actions that night they first slept together that he’d been hit by the bus. And if Robin was going to be honest with herself, it was also because she had just wanted to spend time with him, drawn to the pale figure with a brave face and a shaky smile that reminded her so much of herself at times.
Okay so there was last summer when Barney had been physically vulnerable, and then when she got back from Japan when he had been ready, willing and oh so very able to chase away her unemployment blues with a good screw. Crude but true, that’s what it had been…, at first, but then that day in Robin’s room something had changed and it had remained changed. It was as if they had been having sex in 2-D at first then it had evolved to 3-D, then surround-sound, THX, High Def, the hills are alive kind of thing. And they had gotten married.
Robin paused to analyze her thoughts objectively; weirded out as she may be about the fact that she was legally somebody’s wife and not just somebody but Barney’s, their wedding had not only been awesome but legen-fucking-dary. Nobody and nothing could change that. Okay, so she refused to look back on that day in the AC as anything but good, clean Bro fun with a twist. She shrugged, okay…
So what was the problem? Other than how it would mess up the group dynamic beyond repair and alienate Ted from her forever more? Hmm… how about the fact that she was not in love with Barney Stinson? Granted she had feelings for him but were those feelings of guilt from last year, gratitude for him saving her from banishment to the Great White North… she did not just think that did she? And misplaced appreciation for the stellar performance he executed every single time in the sack? It also didn’t help that Barney had been letting Robin see more of him than he normally allowed which had her all intrigued and drawn to him. This was exactly her problem, she was so confused!
Robin’s stop arrived and she got up, the lovey dovey couple got up too, holding hands they stepped off the train and walked in front of Robin towards the turnstiles. She saw them pull out teenager subway passes and sighed in relief. They were teenagers! That explained everything. Well in that case she gave them until summer vacation. He would meet someone else on the beach in Florida or California and she would hook up with an older guy in the City while she worked at the Gap or Starbucks. She mentally chastised herself for being taken in by a teenage couple.
Walking out into the bright albeit chilly Manhattan air she dug her hands into her pockets and smiled at herself in self-deprecation. Silly Robin.
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Five days after her talk with Lily, Robin came home from a lunch date with some old friends to find Barney watching TV in his bedroom. He was in bed, wearing sweats, drinking beer and munching on popcorn.
“Hey! When did you get back? And you’re wearing sweats!”
Barney smiled at her in greeting and waved her in, “This is good stuff, I Tivod ‘Weeds’ Season 4 last year and I am only just getting round to watching it.”
Robin approached the bed then turned to look at the screen, Nancy Botwin had a gun pulled on Celia in a garage, then she pistol-whipped Celia in the face with it.
“OH! That’s gotta hurt!” Barney whooped.
Robin smiled and taking her coat off, crawled onto the bed, sitting close to Barney with her back against the headboard.
“Oh this is good, I missed this episode and the ones after it too,” Robin said as she fidgeted a little to get comfortable.
Barney was chuckling at what was going on the screen but he reached down and handed Robin a beer, twisting the cap off for her then handing it over. Robin accepted the beverage she clinked her bottle with his before taking a sip. Within minutes they were sharing the popcorn and yelling out in amusement at the antics on screen.
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“So what’d you think?” Barney asked her when their ‘Weeds’ marathon had ended.
“Hmm… it was good, actually it had some really great shit in there but nothing can top seasons 2 and 3 for me.”
Barney mulled this for a second then nodded, “I agree, but you gotta admit Andy being in love with Nancy was a total what the ‘f’ moment, I did not see that coming.”
“I did.”
“No you didn’t.”
“Of course I did… woman’s intuition.”
Robin mentally winced as she remembered what Barney had said to her just last week. But this was different, Nancy and Andy were fictional characters and if she was going to be honest with herself maybe she had had an inkling about his feelings for her for a while. Where the Hell had that admission come from!?
“Oh really?” Barney’s scepticism was ill-concealed.
He couldn’t help but think she had seemed to be quite clueless about his feelings for her until he had just come out and said it last week.
Robin turned to him and whacked him on the arm, “Yes, really!”
“Huh, you decided what you wanna order?”
“I’m feeling Vietnamese food, there’s a great place a couple blocks east of here,” Robin suggested.
Barney made a face, “Do they deliver because I don’t feel like leaving the apartment. I’ve got terrible jet-lag, I mean look at me I’m wearing sweats.”
“Oh my God, yeah, how was your trip?”
Barney shrugged in a non-committal answer. Robin took that to mean she should not probe anymore so she dropped the subject.
“The Vietnamese place does do deliveries in a five mile radius only so we’re covered.”
“Well great so call them!” Barney handed Robin his i-Phone, then climbed off the bed.
“Wait what do you want?”
“Anything that’s not too spicy and no fish or pork,” Barney said over his shoulder as he padded over to the bathroom.
Robin’s call went through and she placed their order. When Barney came back he walked up to his dresser and picked up a bag that was sitting there. Turning over to Robin who had hung up the phone he shook the bag at her.
“I brought you something from the Duty Free.”
Her face lit up, “Oh what is it?”
Barney handed her the bag and sat back down on the bed, picking up the remote he started to search through his Tivo programs, while Robin dumped the contents of the bag on the bed.
“Vanilla flavoured cigarillos! Awesome! Ooh and Johnny Walker miniature collection set! Dior Addict eau de parfum gift set, wow Barney this is amazing… thank you!”
Barney inclined his head in acknowledgment. Robin was opening the cigarillos, she took one out and sniffed it appreciatively. Taking another one out she handed it to Barney and cast around looking for a lighter. Barney reached over to his bedside table and opening the top drawer, took out a red sombrero ashtray and silver Zippo. He leaned over and lit her cigarillo for her before lighting his. Robin took her first puff and exhaled happily.
“Ahh… this is the good stuff.”
Barney chuckled, puffing on his own and blowing rings out.
“So what’d you do all week?”
“Oh not much met up with Lily for coffee on Monday, went to the bar, watched the news, talked to my Mom, went out for lunch with your brother-in-law, Tom yesterday, had lunch with friends today, that’s where I was coming from actually.”
Barney got up and opened his French windows in order to let the cigarillo smoke out. He came back to the bed and sat down again.
“It’s a good thing you go to work soon; you’re becoming a Lady Who Lunches! And lunch with Tom huh? You guys didn’t happen to meet so you could discuss how to be beat the two awesomest guys in the world at pool did you?”
“Sunday was a fluke and it doesn’t count because Ralph accidentally whacked me in the ankle with that blasted hockey stick I gave him! If that hadn’t happened I would never have sank the black ball.”
“Uh huh… so what about the other two games James and I beat you guys at?”
“Lucky break… in our re-match you guys are gonna crash and burn!” Robin threatened.
Barney just shook his head good-naturedly, “If you two conservative gun-nuts wanna tell yourselves that go ahead.”
Robin elbowed him sharply in the ribs and he laughed. She looked down at the gifts laid out in front of her and picked up the perfume set.
“Hey, how’d you know that this was my perfume when we were in the AC?”
“Come on Scherbatsky, I’m Barney, awesome incarnated, you think I wouldn’t know something so simple as what perfume you wear?” he scoffed.
Robin shook her head, “Well I guess I have a few more awesome skills I need to hone then.”
“True story Canada, we’re working on the nationality thing but we’ve gotta give you some lessons in some of the fundamentals you missed out on in that Northern jungle.”
Robin blew smoke in his face and he burst out laughing. She appraised him coolly even though her lips were twitching in mirth.
The doorbell rang and Barney jumped up picking up his wallet, “I’ll get this.”
Robin watched him go and took one last puff of her cigar before putting it out. She hadn’t realized just how much she had missed him until she had seen him again. Trailing into the living room she was just in time to see Barney shut the door on the delivery guy.
Barney walked over to the counter and spread their take out there so they could sit on the bar stools and eat.
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“You’ve got all of ‘The Wire’ on your Tivo?” Robin asked as she cleared their takeout cartons.
“No just the last two seasons, I love that show so much I can’t bring myself to delete them.”
“Even though you have the complete DVD box set?”
“Yes, Ms. Reporter even though I’ve got the DVD box set.”
Robin started laughing, “Do you remember when I used to visit you at the hospital and we’d watch it in your room?”
“Yeah and that male nurse who had a thing for you would always barge into my room when someone was fucking or getting got!”
“Seriously though, we literally watched every HBO show ever last summer.”
Barney held his hand up, “Except for ‘Carnivale’ and that was because a certain someone is scared of the circus.”
“It’s full of freaks, doing weird freaky shit and not the good kind of weird but the fucked up kind that gives you nightmares for days. Then there are the clowns with their scarlet red permagrins, ugh. I can’t believe I found the circus cool when I was a kid!” Robin objected.
They were facing each other across the counter, faces flushed and eyes twinkling merrily.
“You are so Canadian.”
“I’m not offended.”
“Then I’m saying it wrong.”
Robin threw a napkin at him; he ducked it easily and made a face at her. She chased him around the counter and whacked him on the head with a roll of paper towels she had been holding. Barney brought his hands up to defend himself, laughing at her as he made a beeline for his room. Robin did not let up; following him she shoved him onto the bed and straddled him, still whacking him with the roll. Barney brought his hands up to catch her arms, Robin struggled to free herself.
“Why don’t we take our pants off and you can do that some more Scherbatsky?”
She stopped what she was doing and looked down at him; he released her arms and brought his hands to rest on her waist. They searched each other’s eyes and satisfied with what they saw they lunged for each other at the same time.
---------xx
“We should have done that as soon as you got home,” Barney whispered huskily.
They were lying in his bed together, both staring up at the ceiling. Robin shivered and Barney turned to look at her.
“Sorry, I should have closed those windows earlier, let me go turn the heat up.”
Robin shook her head, inching closer until she had wrapped herself around him.
“This way will be faster.”
Barney’s hands reflexively held her closer, skimming vague circles on her back.
“Okay but if you wake up Barnacle Jr. you’ll have to put him down again.”
“I really hope I do.” Robin smirked.
-------------xxx
They had sex a couple more times and then they fell asleep. Neither one of them had meant to fall asleep but it had just happened.
Robin looked around the dark room and wondered what had woken her. Then Barney mumbled something in his sleep again, twitching sporadically. Somehow she had ended up on the far side of the bed so she scooted closer to him. He was having a bad dream that much she could tell from the beads of sweat on his forehead and the erratic fluttering of his eyelids. His entire body was tightly poised as if he was fending off some attack or getting ready to spring. She called his name softly a couple of times but that only seemed to be agitating him further.
She decided to shake him and see if that would wake him. Laying a firm hand on his shoulder she tensed her grip because his skin was damp with sweat and his right hand shot out and grabbed her neck, cutting off her oxygen supply surprisingly fast. He shoved her against the headboard and rolled on top of her, still throttling her. She slapped him across the face and he flinched, not relinquishing his hold completely but loosening it slightly.
“Ba- ba- aarney it’s Robin!” she choked out, frantically making use of the slight relax in grip, her fingers clawing at the hand on her throat. She curled her left hand into a fist and was poised to punch him as hard as she could.
His eyes opened and after registering who she was he let her go instantaneously. She gasped and wheezed trying to breathe in as much precious air as she could. Barney turned on the bedside lamp and vaulting off the bed he ran over to his mini-fridge, taking out a bottle of mineral water he wrenched the cap off and approached Robin. He held the bottle out to her and when she had stopped wheezing and coughing violently she took the water, gulping it down. Barney took the bottle away from her.
“Slowly and only small sips Scherbatsky.”
She nodded in understanding and took the water from him, drinking it like he said.
“I’m sooo sorry…Are you okay? I didn’t know where I was, I thought I was still... on my trip. Here let me take a look at your neck.” Barney tilted her head back and assessed the finger shaped bruises already blooming like reddish purple ink stains on chromatography paper.
He got up and went in to the bathroom, Robin heard the faucet running. She gingerly explored her neck wondering what the Hell kind of trip Barney had been on to make him react like that in his sleep. He came back and gently pressed a cold wash-cloth to her neck. She covered his hand with hers and wouldn’t let him slide his hand away.
“Thanks,” she croaked.
Barney’s face contorted in pain. Robin raised her other hand and stroked his arm in a soothing up and down motion; her eyes softening in sympathy.
“It’s not as bad as it sounds or looks, honest. Are you okay?” she rasped.
“No! No I’m not, Robin I hurt you.”
She shrugged, “That’s what I get for breaking the rules and staying in your bed when I was supposed to be long gone.”
She cracked a smile to show him she was joking but he didn’t respond in kind. She surrendered his hand and he dropped it immediately. The wash-cloth started to fall but she caught it, continuing to press it on her swelling flesh.
“Oh come on Stinson, I’m Canadian, when we play hockey we get at least one hockey stick and two elbows to the neck, a black eye and broken bone per game. I’ll be fine by morning,” she explained in her most patient voice.
Barney’s eyes were very troubled as he watched her. His attitude combined with the raw ache in her throat irked her, it wasn’t a big deal, well it kind of was, but she wasn’t upset with him so why was he looking at her like a sick puppy.
“Stop being such a woman about this, I’m not made of glass, fuck you very much,” she snapped, throwing the covers back so she could get out of the bed.
That did make Barney chuckle and he grabbed her; dragging her onto his lap and holding her close.
“Alright, jeez! I get it you’re a tough cookie! Now let me take a look at the bruising before I go and tuck you into your own bed.”
Robin pulled the towel away and Barney noticed that the swelling was not so bad, he told her so and she rolled her eyes in exasperation. Chuckling he picked her up and carried her to her bed. They were both naked.
After he forced Robin to wear her pyjamas, Barney tucked her in, placing another cold compress to her neck.
“Okay, I’m gonna make sure you’re asleep before I get back to bed so, you’re tired and I’m tired… I think its time I told you one of my legendary bedtime stories.”
Robin perked up at this, burrowing in her covers, she watched him as he sat on the bed, back to the headboard, on top of her blankets. He covered his nudity with her soft purple and pink blanket. The feminine article looked incongruous in contrast to his golden-tanned muscles. In fact it served to emphasize his masculinity and reminded Robin of the strength she had not known he possessed until he’d wrapped a hand around her neck. She must be crazy but she found him on the bed with her girly blanket on his lap a turn on, she wanted to protest his refusal to get under the covers with her but she could tell he would not agree to getting in there with her after what had just happened. Damn men and their misplaced chivalry.
“I’m ready,” she prompted.
Barney looked down at her indulgently and stroked her hair back absentmindedly.
“Ah…now which story should I tell?”
“The longest, dirtiest most exciting one,” Robin rasped.
“Unh-uh, don’t be greedy pick one; longest or dirtiest, all of them are exciting so that’s not a separate category.”
Robin smiled, “Longest.”
Barney frowned thoughtfully, “Really? You surprise me Scherbatsky I so thought you’d go for dirtiest.”
“Tell the story Barney.”
“Okay, okay but public disclaimer, any sexual urges you may develop during the telling of this story are purely natural and should you feel a certain wet warmth in your nether regions like many of the fictional characters in my story this is a welcome reaction but purely coincidental, we do however, encourage you to feel free to show and tell.”
Robin smacked his thigh smartly, “You’re unbelievable.”
“Funny you should say that ‘cause that’s the very first line the heroine says to the hero!”
Robin rolled her eyes.
“Now this story has three protagonists, Roberta, Leila and Bartacus, Barry for short. We begin with Roberta and Leila who were playing ‘Doctors without Borders’ in Bartacus’ field-”
“Oh brother,” Robin groaned.
-------------------xxxx