Carthage Black Radio Play #2
SCENE: a Schroedinger's Box inside an n-dimensional Faraday Cage. The BOARDROOM of MIMESIS, 2021.
Lev: I call this meeting to order. Are we quorate?
Jay: Some of us aren't even chordate.
Peter: I object to the phrase "tentacular monstrosity".
Jay: Better than that TESTICULAR MONSTROSITY over there (motions towards Lev). And, Peter, you have eight TENTACLES (pause). And they're all FEEDING TENTACLES, aren't they?
Peter: Not true! This one is for holding my MOBILE PHONE (gestures with PHONE).
Jay: Why is your mobile phone made of CHOCOLATE?
Peter: Because I CAN. Now be QUIET, you SINGING CAN OF SPAM.
Jay: Be quiet yourself, you POLYMORPHOUS BLIMP.
Lev: We're all pretty polymorphous here.
Jay: Ha! & and I are PRETTY. YOU LOT are merely POLYMORPHOUS.
Lev: What's that sparking between your antennae?
Jay: Ecstatic electricity {bzzzt} OH! AAAH! ARROOOGAH!
Lev: There's a time and a place . . .
&: {emits amused phosphorescence}
Lev: You shouldn't smoke in here. It's a bad habit.
Jay: No, it's a DEGENERATE habit. And I'm PROUD to be a DEGENERATE.
Peter: You seem to have become a REGENERATE too. Your ANTENNAE are already growing back . . .
Lev: What's that new appendage growing out of your neck, Peter?
Peter: Auxiliary feeding tube. So I don't talk with my mouth full.
Jay: It's a FUNNEL, isn't it? A FUNNEL with TASTE BUDS.
Lev: SHUT UP! And take that Zulu Death Mask off.
Jay: I can't, it's ingrown.
Lev: They have operations for that.
Peter: BE QUIET. And SIT STILL.
Jay: Sorry. My HAEMORRHOIDS are chafing . . .
(fade to black)
Next: A Portrait Of The Haemorrhoid As A Rapidly Evolving New Limb.
Lev: I call this meeting to order. Are we quorate?
Jay: Some of us aren't even chordate.
Peter: I object to the phrase "tentacular monstrosity".
Jay: Better than that TESTICULAR MONSTROSITY over there (motions towards Lev). And, Peter, you have eight TENTACLES (pause). And they're all FEEDING TENTACLES, aren't they?
Peter: Not true! This one is for holding my MOBILE PHONE (gestures with PHONE).
Jay: Why is your mobile phone made of CHOCOLATE?
Peter: Because I CAN. Now be QUIET, you SINGING CAN OF SPAM.
Jay: Be quiet yourself, you POLYMORPHOUS BLIMP.
Lev: We're all pretty polymorphous here.
Jay: Ha! & and I are PRETTY. YOU LOT are merely POLYMORPHOUS.
Lev: What's that sparking between your antennae?
Jay: Ecstatic electricity {bzzzt} OH! AAAH! ARROOOGAH!
Lev: There's a time and a place . . .
&: {emits amused phosphorescence}
Lev: You shouldn't smoke in here. It's a bad habit.
Jay: No, it's a DEGENERATE habit. And I'm PROUD to be a DEGENERATE.
Peter: You seem to have become a REGENERATE too. Your ANTENNAE are already growing back . . .
Lev: What's that new appendage growing out of your neck, Peter?
Peter: Auxiliary feeding tube. So I don't talk with my mouth full.
Jay: It's a FUNNEL, isn't it? A FUNNEL with TASTE BUDS.
Lev: SHUT UP! And take that Zulu Death Mask off.
Jay: I can't, it's ingrown.
Lev: They have operations for that.
Peter: BE QUIET. And SIT STILL.
Jay: Sorry. My HAEMORRHOIDS are chafing . . .
(fade to black)
Next: A Portrait Of The Haemorrhoid As A Rapidly Evolving New Limb.