so to but it simply.......i suck
i suck............
i can't sing well i wanted glee - never got it
i can't dance well, concidered show chior, whouldn't be able to keep up with the complicanted dances.
i wanted to act in plays. in grade school i never got any major roles always the exras. thats how it has been in the broadways too.
i loved basketball sooo much. it was my sport. played it from 6th to 9th grade. 9th grade somthin chnaged , some games i sat on the bench. there were 5 games i did not get to play, yea i rember the exact number. i loved it but i never was that great at it and i did not enjoy it my freshmen year and so i did not try out the following. instead i joined the cross team.
i am a decent runner not good , not bad. not even really that good for the leauge we r in. but now track and cross county is all i have to hold on to. beacuse............
i was let go from soccer. i did not make varsity unlike all my other junior teamates who did. i did not even reseve the offer to stay on jv. he droped me for the freshmen. he wanted to give them an oppertuity. he said that i am not good enough for jv i have skills better then most of the freshmen but he wants to give them the oppertuinty to play soccer and i am already a junior adn gettting to old for jv. i am not upset with coach george. the man is a good coach and a nice person. he is very sweet and felt really bad. the person i am mad at is myself. i am sick of never being good at anything. there are people who have skills and they are good at lots of things. others are good at fewer things but they still excel at what they do. then there are others who are good at nothing. that is where i get to go. i have absolutly nothing i am good at.
it's not that i am utterly upset that i am not back on jv. i was considering quitting soccer if i was put back on jv so it made the dection easy. its just there are things that look so cool to me. being a varsity soccer player is one of them along with the stuff listed above. i really dont' no who i am anymore. everywhere i turn i am failing......
everything i love , i fail at, if u want to get tecnical..... i even fail at love
i am just a worthless peice of existance taking up space.....
if u r taking out the time of your life to read this please understand that the soccer thing is not the only thing getting me down these days. and yes i no that i am being pathtic so u dont' have to tell me. i no that other peopel have it off alot worse then me so there is no need to tell me that either. this is just how i feel and right now i feel worthless. there is only one more hope for me and that is running. then after high school its all over and no one gives a shit anyway.........well thats life.
i can't sing well i wanted glee - never got it
i can't dance well, concidered show chior, whouldn't be able to keep up with the complicanted dances.
i wanted to act in plays. in grade school i never got any major roles always the exras. thats how it has been in the broadways too.
i loved basketball sooo much. it was my sport. played it from 6th to 9th grade. 9th grade somthin chnaged , some games i sat on the bench. there were 5 games i did not get to play, yea i rember the exact number. i loved it but i never was that great at it and i did not enjoy it my freshmen year and so i did not try out the following. instead i joined the cross team.
i am a decent runner not good , not bad. not even really that good for the leauge we r in. but now track and cross county is all i have to hold on to. beacuse............
i was let go from soccer. i did not make varsity unlike all my other junior teamates who did. i did not even reseve the offer to stay on jv. he droped me for the freshmen. he wanted to give them an oppertuity. he said that i am not good enough for jv i have skills better then most of the freshmen but he wants to give them the oppertuinty to play soccer and i am already a junior adn gettting to old for jv. i am not upset with coach george. the man is a good coach and a nice person. he is very sweet and felt really bad. the person i am mad at is myself. i am sick of never being good at anything. there are people who have skills and they are good at lots of things. others are good at fewer things but they still excel at what they do. then there are others who are good at nothing. that is where i get to go. i have absolutly nothing i am good at.
it's not that i am utterly upset that i am not back on jv. i was considering quitting soccer if i was put back on jv so it made the dection easy. its just there are things that look so cool to me. being a varsity soccer player is one of them along with the stuff listed above. i really dont' no who i am anymore. everywhere i turn i am failing......
everything i love , i fail at, if u want to get tecnical..... i even fail at love
i am just a worthless peice of existance taking up space.....
if u r taking out the time of your life to read this please understand that the soccer thing is not the only thing getting me down these days. and yes i no that i am being pathtic so u dont' have to tell me. i no that other peopel have it off alot worse then me so there is no need to tell me that either. this is just how i feel and right now i feel worthless. there is only one more hope for me and that is running. then after high school its all over and no one gives a shit anyway.........well thats life.