Sigh.
It's bad when your gynecologist doesn't understand why you want to get in to Gender Studies (as a sub-focus of Japanese lit, but still.)
I understand now (I think, anyway) why Miyake comes off as/is so callous.
She has to be that way, to deal with all the shit she's been getting her entire academic life for choosing to do what she does.
I was incredulous when people told me that I was the only one that thought being a professor was something that everyone respected--admittedly, I knew from the start that people would make fun of my field and the constant possibility of my devolving into a hobo under the Karasuma-oike bridge out of monetary necessity, but I never actually thought that people wouldn't at least give me a nod of recognition after my oh-so-proud "I'm going to be a professor" declaration.
And when your gyno gives you the "well, I think everyone should follow their dreams speech" after you try to explain (in layman's terms, to a doctor, whoda thunk) your research interests... well, it kind of all comes together.
Miyake may wind up crushing a few hearts, but it's how she deals with this shit the world throws at her. She even has to deal with it within her own field, as she started working with manga and gender before it was as mainstream as it is now. And when you consider the state of the field now as "mainstream"... well, it gives you an idea. I've heard stories. And, while that doesn't give her the right to basically insult Flueckiger to his face at a mixer or treat people with only the barest minimum of tact (and even then...), I understand now.
The problem is that I think only people like me (that is to say, only people (a) who want to get into a small, specialized field and (b) who have dealt with Miyake for about five years) will ever get this far, and most will just be put off and leave, thinking about what a bitch she is.
And I hope I don't turn out like that, since a small, probably-soon-to-be-crushed idealistic part of me (I know, I didn't think I had any either) really wants to inspire some future students to pursue a career in academia, just like I was inspired, and I'm already such a socially leprous misanthrope that if I became any more actively mean and unlikable, I think they might lynch me.
But then again, if it works? If being hard and callous makes it easier to laugh off all the shit, and ignore the pain?
Well, damn. She might have the way of it after all, and I'm the one who needs to get over myself and grow a tougher skin.
... that last part is probably true regardless. Oh, well.
I understand now (I think, anyway) why Miyake comes off as/is so callous.
She has to be that way, to deal with all the shit she's been getting her entire academic life for choosing to do what she does.
I was incredulous when people told me that I was the only one that thought being a professor was something that everyone respected--admittedly, I knew from the start that people would make fun of my field and the constant possibility of my devolving into a hobo under the Karasuma-oike bridge out of monetary necessity, but I never actually thought that people wouldn't at least give me a nod of recognition after my oh-so-proud "I'm going to be a professor" declaration.
And when your gyno gives you the "well, I think everyone should follow their dreams speech" after you try to explain (in layman's terms, to a doctor, whoda thunk) your research interests... well, it kind of all comes together.
Miyake may wind up crushing a few hearts, but it's how she deals with this shit the world throws at her. She even has to deal with it within her own field, as she started working with manga and gender before it was as mainstream as it is now. And when you consider the state of the field now as "mainstream"... well, it gives you an idea. I've heard stories. And, while that doesn't give her the right to basically insult Flueckiger to his face at a mixer or treat people with only the barest minimum of tact (and even then...), I understand now.
The problem is that I think only people like me (that is to say, only people (a) who want to get into a small, specialized field and (b) who have dealt with Miyake for about five years) will ever get this far, and most will just be put off and leave, thinking about what a bitch she is.
And I hope I don't turn out like that, since a small, probably-soon-to-be-crushed idealistic part of me (I know, I didn't think I had any either) really wants to inspire some future students to pursue a career in academia, just like I was inspired, and I'm already such a socially leprous misanthrope that if I became any more actively mean and unlikable, I think they might lynch me.
But then again, if it works? If being hard and callous makes it easier to laugh off all the shit, and ignore the pain?
Well, damn. She might have the way of it after all, and I'm the one who needs to get over myself and grow a tougher skin.
... that last part is probably true regardless. Oh, well.