(no subject)
My behavior? Perverse need?
These two things have been on my mind since I laid upon the couch, and will continue to be until I solve this particular mystery. I was not so blind to notice the look he gave me the night I stayed with them. I had not been thinking when I rubbed her back, at least not of how it may appear. Had that been the behavior he spoke of? But what of this "perverse need"? Does he believe that...I lust for her? My fondness for her has nothing to do of that nature. I couldn't. I just...couldn't.
If he does not mean this...I fear what he does mean.
How would he know? There were three who know of my affliction. One does not care enough to spread such things, and if he did he would be sure to inform me, the other has become a confidant, the latter...I do not know if he would speak of such things, especially when he tells me to remain silent about the matter. There is a forth, though...perhaps it was him. He was very angered that I have become what I am. I do not know. I am confused and in pain; my nose has been broken tonight, and tomorrow the bruise will be disgusting. I must have went unconscious after the strike, for I found myself awakening in the parlour with Liza hovering above me, cleaning blood from my face.
I will need to replace the lens in my glasses when I've the energy to do so, for now I must rest. The codeine I had taken is beginning to work, and the pain is diminishing, forcing my exhaustion come to the forefront of my mind. And my worry. He will kill her...I mustn't let that happen.
My night has been hectic, hers ever more so. I hope with all my being that my sleep will be empty of nightmares. If not, then I am afraid I must take something stronger just to get a full night's rest.
These two things have been on my mind since I laid upon the couch, and will continue to be until I solve this particular mystery. I was not so blind to notice the look he gave me the night I stayed with them. I had not been thinking when I rubbed her back, at least not of how it may appear. Had that been the behavior he spoke of? But what of this "perverse need"? Does he believe that...I lust for her? My fondness for her has nothing to do of that nature. I couldn't. I just...couldn't.
If he does not mean this...I fear what he does mean.
How would he know? There were three who know of my affliction. One does not care enough to spread such things, and if he did he would be sure to inform me, the other has become a confidant, the latter...I do not know if he would speak of such things, especially when he tells me to remain silent about the matter. There is a forth, though...perhaps it was him. He was very angered that I have become what I am. I do not know. I am confused and in pain; my nose has been broken tonight, and tomorrow the bruise will be disgusting. I must have went unconscious after the strike, for I found myself awakening in the parlour with Liza hovering above me, cleaning blood from my face.
I will need to replace the lens in my glasses when I've the energy to do so, for now I must rest. The codeine I had taken is beginning to work, and the pain is diminishing, forcing my exhaustion come to the forefront of my mind. And my worry. He will kill her...I mustn't let that happen.
My night has been hectic, hers ever more so. I hope with all my being that my sleep will be empty of nightmares. If not, then I am afraid I must take something stronger just to get a full night's rest.