(no subject)
Sometimes, I wish emotions ran on a switch system. Like, when your brain realizes, "Hey, I'm angry. It's time to be mad!" And then it flips a switch in your skull, and boom! You're angry.
With all the crap going on with my loans and stuff, I really wish I could just turn emotions on and off because, whenever I'm by myself, thinking about the situation, there's this little tiny piece in the back of my brain that gets louder. That piece really just wants to be sad for like. . .5 minutes, and cry. And then it'd be done, and I could do everything I need to do.
But I can't for whatever reason. And so, whenever I'm stuck by myself, it just sits there and bitches at me perpetually about how it'd really like to cry. Your subconscious can be such a pain sometimes, y'know?
Other than that, things are changing, I'm gonna be getting back into school, Winter has brought a new distaste to my mouth in the form of an individual, who has earned a decent amount of my contempt.
Life is starting to get better, after losing the job at Fry's. I've been mooching off of Rob for who knows how long now. I kind of feel like scum for it, but that should change soon. . .as soon as I get into school, and can find a new job.
As for everything else, well. . .it is what it is. Some things are amazing, some people continue to nigh-blind me with the intensity of their beauty, some things are shit, and some people just really deserve to be beaten within an inch of their lives.
I seem to have taken in a decent amount of "Not Giving a Damn." in my recent dosage of life's vitamins. It is reacting interestingly with my social life. Some things are falling by the wayside. . .which makes some people angry, but I realized I don't entirely care right now. I'm trying to get my shit settled so I can have a good life for once, as opposed to setting myself up in some ramshod simulacra of a life, and convince myself that it's good.
I know my true mates are gonna be there for me through it all, and won't abandon me just 'cause I don't have much time at the moment for 'em. I also know that I'll have no hard feelings for the people who decide to fade into the background. That's their choice. More power to 'em, and I hope they have amazing lives.
That's all for now, Gentle Readers, I hope that I can fill in more of my thoughts soon,
Yours,
Red
With all the crap going on with my loans and stuff, I really wish I could just turn emotions on and off because, whenever I'm by myself, thinking about the situation, there's this little tiny piece in the back of my brain that gets louder. That piece really just wants to be sad for like. . .5 minutes, and cry. And then it'd be done, and I could do everything I need to do.
But I can't for whatever reason. And so, whenever I'm stuck by myself, it just sits there and bitches at me perpetually about how it'd really like to cry. Your subconscious can be such a pain sometimes, y'know?
Other than that, things are changing, I'm gonna be getting back into school, Winter has brought a new distaste to my mouth in the form of an individual, who has earned a decent amount of my contempt.
Life is starting to get better, after losing the job at Fry's. I've been mooching off of Rob for who knows how long now. I kind of feel like scum for it, but that should change soon. . .as soon as I get into school, and can find a new job.
As for everything else, well. . .it is what it is. Some things are amazing, some people continue to nigh-blind me with the intensity of their beauty, some things are shit, and some people just really deserve to be beaten within an inch of their lives.
I seem to have taken in a decent amount of "Not Giving a Damn." in my recent dosage of life's vitamins. It is reacting interestingly with my social life. Some things are falling by the wayside. . .which makes some people angry, but I realized I don't entirely care right now. I'm trying to get my shit settled so I can have a good life for once, as opposed to setting myself up in some ramshod simulacra of a life, and convince myself that it's good.
I know my true mates are gonna be there for me through it all, and won't abandon me just 'cause I don't have much time at the moment for 'em. I also know that I'll have no hard feelings for the people who decide to fade into the background. That's their choice. More power to 'em, and I hope they have amazing lives.
That's all for now, Gentle Readers, I hope that I can fill in more of my thoughts soon,
Yours,
Red