gister huilde ik, vandaag ging ik dansen. twee voorstellingen en steeds kwam ik er zo warm en gelukkig uit. in een geblokt overhemd en snel aangeschoten all stars hoi zeggen tegen mijn ouders. een kus op mijn wang en gemeende lof en ik voelde me weer een danser. vreemd is dat, hoe ik me vaak het meest een danser voel na voorstellingen en lessen. ( Read more... )

( badly written ballet ramblings. )

it'd been three weeks since i last stepped into my contemporary class, and tonight i walked through the city with a skip in my step to get there. at the entrance i met one of the girls and happily chatting away we walked through the hallways into the dressing room. we talked while undressing and when i walked into the studio and smiled at the ( Read more... )

fatigue is marching through me with thorny bushes, dragging over my insides and making me ache everywhere. i'm continuously tip-toeing the edge of tears, yet i don't feel superbly out of balance. mostly i'm ridiculously tired of my own company. the house is so silent and i can only fill up so much ( Read more... )

i just want to dance in beautiful places, that's all i want. just for someone to write me a choreography for endless mountaintops and forests inhabited with fairies and desert dunes and pearly white beaches with the crystaline blue ocean reaching my ankles and buildings of light with wide smooth floors.

no, i know, i want more out of life than ( Read more... )

i'm tired. no, in fact, i'm exhausted.

so this is a general update because i feel like i need to.

on friday it was my cousin's wedding day, something i'd been looking forward to for months, and it was lovely. i wore my tight white skinnies and pink dress and i'd tucked a flower in my hair and i smiled so much. (up for a classy bathroom picture ( Read more... )

today was three trains and four busses. that's a lot of public transport for an ordinary monday ( Read more... )

i'm seriously considering quitting classical ballet and i hate it. i have to finish out the year, so i'm bound for a while yet, but the thoughts echo in my mind.

not because i dislike ballet, (i still adore it, in fact) but because i've started to dislike the lessons. i miss the change of teachers and the 'different' styles we were taught our ( Read more... )

so about my contemporary ballet class.

semester over, new semester, new lesson.
she mentioned it, but our teacher really is big on floorwork, so last lesson was pretty much filled with it. this one has none, which i'm both grateful for and dissapointed by. i was proud of my bruises, but it did really hurt sometimes.

it's leaning towards classical ( Read more... )

i don't know if it's like that for everyone, but going somewhere i've never been on my own, doing something with people i've never met.. that's kind of scary. last night i didn't let that stop me, and i went to a contemporary ballet class at another danceschool.

it was kind of awesome.

i love contemporary ballet. because i've only done classical so ( Read more... )