swallowing gum doesn't kill you.

[drunkinmunchkin]

last night i was invited to go to a karaoke bar, so i went.
a creepy drunk guy kissed my neck.

someone told me that if he dies in his sleep he wants me to know that he thinks i'm "fucking amazing."
it surprises me when i tell people about myself and it doesn't scare them off. maybe i'm not that scary after all.