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[drugsnrocknroll]

             ..The I miss ..

• I miss rachel an her sarcastic remarks an her "too bads" and random out bursts
• I miss stephie gee an her flapping wings
• I miss lavette and her awesome laugh
• I miss X and his awesomeness
• I miss nick and his dorky ness
• I miss matt an his hugs that make everything better
• I miss the old carlos
• I miss when me an justin used to have fun an not care
• I miss caring
• I miss choir
• I miss my mother
• I miss long talks with no ending or meaning with rachel an stephie gee

..The I remembers..

• I remember when shaun used to speak like a gofer
• I remember the first day me rachel an stephie gee hung out an we all felt complete
• I remember the way I felt the first time I met justin
• I remember the first thought in my mind when I knew Xavier had left back to houston
• I remember the feeling of quite possibly never being able to hang out with matt again
• I remember when things were different...
• I remember when the ninja crew would all retreat to the "ninja layer" or  to rachels car after we ate
• I remember the pain I felt on graduation day
• I remember the empty-ness after I had to say goodbye to rachel
• I remember crying forever after rachel left
• I remember my mother always being here
• I remember the sadness in stephanies eyes and how she tries to hide it
• I remember the look on rachels face when she was driving away
• I remember when me and shaun would walk to school and he had to hold my hand
• I remember always being dependent on shaun when I was younger

              ..The I knows..

• I know things will never be the same
• I know stephanie and me will try our hardest to stay together
• I know I can't feel much of anything right now
• I know I will see matt soon
• I know I will get away someday
• I know that getting away won't do much of anything unless I'm happy
• I know we all smile and say things are fine but......nothing really is
• I know their will never really be a Perfect day
• I know there is no such thing as I love you forever
• I know puppy love hurts
• I know goodbyes are only easy if you never look back

         ..The I didn't knows..

•  I didn't know I could be so cold sometimes
• I didn't know what I was doing was bad for my health
• I didn't know that saying goodbye would still hurt this bad after weeks an weeks
• I didn't know how amazingly strong miss gee was till the day rachel left
• I didn't know how great lavette was till I thought of all the little things she has done an said to me.
• I didn't know how much something I did or said could hurt someone so much

       ..The I'm sorrys..

• I'm sorry I am really mean sometimes
• I'm sorry that things aren't always the way they seem
• I'm sorry that you think you need things to make you feel better
• I'm sorry people are cutters
• I'm sorry I don't tell people till it gets worse
• I'm sorry that I've ever made you cry

       ..The I love the way..

• I love the way stephanie flaps her wings
• I love the way me an stephanie would make messed up faces to eachother during choir
• I love the way if lavette laughs really hard she does this weird squeaky thing
• I love the way shaun laughs when he laughs really hard
• I love the way shaun talks to himself sometimes
• I love the way myk talks to refined
• I love the way I could talk to justin about almost anything
• I love the way I was honest with justin
• I love the way justin would hold my hand
• I love the way if I was looking a different direction justin would do something weird to get my attention
• I love the way stephanie always watches my back and helps me out
• I love the way at hardcore shows me an steph do out own dancing moves in our own pit
• I love the way it smells before it rains
• I love the way it feels waking up at the beach
• I love the way a song can make me feel
• I love the way I dance by myself like a weirdo
• I love the way I like seclusion
• I love the way stephanie looks when shes confused
• I love the way a meaningful hugs feels