freefallin' 4
anonymous
February 13 2010, 19:51:00 UTC
Mikado wasn't really sure what to make of all this. He stared uncomprehendingly at the blackboard and tapped his pencil nervously on his desk, and the only thought that was running through his mind at the moment was "At least he put on a nice shirt."
And Izaya had put on a nice shirt. It was white, a fifty-fifty cotton-linen blend. He had even added a pair of black slacks and dress shoes, too. And a tie. How charming.
"Now, class, if the limit at infinity exists - "
The student sitting behind Mikado gave a slight cough and raised his hand. "Sir, this is history, not calc-"
"Shut the fuck up. Anyway, as I was saying, if the limit at infinity exists, what does it represent?"
Mikado shot his hand up into the air, flustered. "Mr. Orihara?"
Izaya turned from the blackboard and gave him his most winning smile. "Yes?"
"Can I go to the bathroom?"
Izaya was obviously displeased. "Yeah. But make it quick."
Stepping out into the hallway was a breath of fresh air for Mikado. The last twenty-four hours had been so strange. Ikebukuro still had not recovered fully from the blackout the night before, and the lights overheard flickered on and off ominously, like something out of a bad horror movie. The heavy scent of fried fish wafted up from the cafeteria. Mikado inhaled deeply and frowned. He was really hungry.
"Hey, kid."
Mikado turned to see a blond man standing before him, his face contorted into a mask of righteous anger. Mikado found him vaguely familiar but he couldn't for the life of him remember who he was.
"Yeah?"
"You got some idiot named Orihara teaching in that classroom right there?"
"Uh huh."
"Good. I'm gonna fuck a bitch up today."
"Okay."
The man opened the door, stormed into the classroom, and slammed it abruptly. Mikado blinked, and then hurried down the corridor to the boy's bathroom.
_______
"IZAYA!"
Izaya looked up from his diagram and gave Shizuo a toothy grin.
"Well, hello Shizu-chan," he said mildly. "Glad to see you joining us. I met your brother disguised as a woman yesterday while shopping for groceries, he said that it was the only way he could go out in public without being mobbed by screaming fans. Anyway, he mentioned something about you needing to take a remedial algebra class, which I thought was rather sad. You're a debt collector and you're not good with numbers? How odd. I would love to help you, though. Unfortunately, I don't teach remedial algebra, that would be classroom 406 - "
"You miserable shit!" Shizuo screamed. He picked up Anri's desk (she looked rather unfazed) and held it high above his head. "Are you even qualified for this job?!?"
"Why, yes. I have a degree in education from - "
"No you don't, you skank whore! You majored in sociology! I would know, I studied business administration down the hall and I caught you blowing your professor that one ti-"
Suddenly, the air filled with the scent of fried fish. Kida, who had been dozing in the back of the classroom for the better part of an hour, immediately perked up. Anri inhaled curiously. Izaya froze. Shizuo looked around confusedly.
And then the door burst open.
"Hey kids! It's your friendly local Russian sushi chef here. I bet you're all tired of eating the same old cafeteria food day after day, aren't you? Well, luckily for you, Russia Sushi has come to your school just for today in order to serve you guys up a little something special. You deserve it! So come down to the cafeteria at lunch and have some delicious sushi infused with some Russian attitude. See you then!"
And with that, Simon closed the door.
The students gasped. Shizuo's jaw dropped. Anri's eyes widened. Izaya's face grew slack. Kida almost began to sob with joy.
Shizuo turned to the class, an awestruck look on his face.
"Did you hear that voice?" he whispered. "That wonderful, marvelous, beautiful voice? And did you see that stunningly handsome man?"
The students all nodded reverently. And then the door burst open again.
And Izaya had put on a nice shirt. It was white, a fifty-fifty cotton-linen blend. He had even added a pair of black slacks and dress shoes, too. And a tie. How charming.
"Now, class, if the limit at infinity exists - "
The student sitting behind Mikado gave a slight cough and raised his hand. "Sir, this is history, not calc-"
"Shut the fuck up. Anyway, as I was saying, if the limit at infinity exists, what does it represent?"
Mikado shot his hand up into the air, flustered. "Mr. Orihara?"
Izaya turned from the blackboard and gave him his most winning smile. "Yes?"
"Can I go to the bathroom?"
Izaya was obviously displeased. "Yeah. But make it quick."
Stepping out into the hallway was a breath of fresh air for Mikado. The last twenty-four hours had been so strange. Ikebukuro still had not recovered fully from the blackout the night before, and the lights overheard flickered on and off ominously, like something out of a bad horror movie. The heavy scent of fried fish wafted up from the cafeteria. Mikado inhaled deeply and frowned. He was really hungry.
"Hey, kid."
Mikado turned to see a blond man standing before him, his face contorted into a mask of righteous anger. Mikado found him vaguely familiar but he couldn't for the life of him remember who he was.
"Yeah?"
"You got some idiot named Orihara teaching in that classroom right there?"
"Uh huh."
"Good. I'm gonna fuck a bitch up today."
"Okay."
The man opened the door, stormed into the classroom, and slammed it abruptly. Mikado blinked, and then hurried down the corridor to the boy's bathroom.
_______
"IZAYA!"
Izaya looked up from his diagram and gave Shizuo a toothy grin.
"Well, hello Shizu-chan," he said mildly. "Glad to see you joining us. I met your brother disguised as a woman yesterday while shopping for groceries, he said that it was the only way he could go out in public without being mobbed by screaming fans. Anyway, he mentioned something about you needing to take a remedial algebra class, which I thought was rather sad. You're a debt collector and you're not good with numbers? How odd. I would love to help you, though. Unfortunately, I don't teach remedial algebra, that would be classroom 406 - "
"You miserable shit!" Shizuo screamed. He picked up Anri's desk (she looked rather unfazed) and held it high above his head. "Are you even qualified for this job?!?"
"Why, yes. I have a degree in education from - "
"No you don't, you skank whore! You majored in sociology! I would know, I studied business administration down the hall and I caught you blowing your professor that one ti-"
Suddenly, the air filled with the scent of fried fish. Kida, who had been dozing in the back of the classroom for the better part of an hour, immediately perked up. Anri inhaled curiously. Izaya froze. Shizuo looked around confusedly.
And then the door burst open.
"Hey kids! It's your friendly local Russian sushi chef here. I bet you're all tired of eating the same old cafeteria food day after day, aren't you? Well, luckily for you, Russia Sushi has come to your school just for today in order to serve you guys up a little something special. You deserve it! So come down to the cafeteria at lunch and have some delicious sushi infused with some Russian attitude. See you then!"
And with that, Simon closed the door.
The students gasped. Shizuo's jaw dropped. Anri's eyes widened. Izaya's face grew slack. Kida almost began to sob with joy.
Shizuo turned to the class, an awestruck look on his face.
"Did you hear that voice?" he whispered. "That wonderful, marvelous, beautiful voice? And did you see that stunningly handsome man?"
The students all nodded reverently. And then the door burst open again.
"Did I miss anything?" Mikado asked.
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