(no subject)
I could definately use a good cry right now. For no apparent reason, either, just because I think its time I let out some steam. You could say that life right now is moderately ok. I'm fine with my family, but its the whole friends ordeal. I've been hanging around with a lot of people from my stupid school (staying postive!) and watching everyone "grow up" that I knew when I was younger. I know I have to be nice to all of them and everyone isn't so bad. Cross country is forcing me to be a bit social and involved with school, which I need junior year. I need to make up for last year and all of my mistakes. The sport itself is grueling, I really wonder what keeps me going. If only I had the discipline and stamina to have ran on my own since I first found this individual sport, would I have succeeded now that I am older. I want to do better in everything. My father and I played tennis for 3 hours and we didn't even fight, now that I take it seriously and he understands I like fast balls, and I understand the low to high, curve your racket concept, I'm actually decent. I am very disappointed with the rest of the Europe pictures I got back, it seems like half of the pictures I took were never taken.. or are on some other random person's camera. Ariel Alana and I in the sunflower fields, hanging out with the local Spanish boys in Sort with Alana, group pics at the airport, rare pictures of the boys, Alex in his leather jacket...none of those pictures are there. Spent a lot of time organizing pictures freshman-currently in albums. Its too bad I can't add everything that was even on my mind because the entry I had written so vigourously disappeared. I was very surprised when Pilar imed me today, it seems we had a lot to talk about. I wish I had gotten to know certain people when I went to Towson better. On a heavier note, my father got a letter from Loyola College offering a shitload of money for just the first offer on the house we own but is now fucker Webb's when owns a lot of houses in the area already. My mother lost us a lot of money on real estate properties; it really doesn't matter to me, but I just wanted to point out to her that had she waited another year to explode and do a 360 on the entire family, we would be doing extremely well financially and Julian and I would be set. Thanks, mother.