Poker Face--the beginning of the lessons of waitresshood
Waiting tables emphasizes the importance of the Poker Face. No prejudice is allowed here. When a man walks in and you serve him just before noticing that his top half is man and his bottom half is slutty woman, you just smile to yourself. In a middle class, working neighborhood where most of the clientele is white, middle aged, and much of the time dirty from car grease/house paint, it is needless to say that a man with pink toenails, shaved legs, high heels, and short shorts sticks out a little bit. Don’t get me wrong, he looked damn fine though the shoes looked a little uncomfortable. He could really pull off those shorts, but he was also definitely getting looks from other tables.
The Poker Face comes in handy with people who have no teeth and muscle spasms, with people covered in tattoos, extraordinarily hot older men, people who speak only French/Spanish/Russian, and people who, before they inhale their greasy hashbrowns and biscuits and gravy, say grace. A waitress should never give out her true feelings about a customer. Otherwise other customers will notice that they aren’t getting truth, they’re only getting a Poker Face.
Also, with the food, though it is easy to do so, one cannot be prejudiced with taking orders. Not only men order pork chops. Not all women want vinaigrette dressing. If someone wants you to mix half orange juice and milk together for their kid, you do it only after clarifying that this is what she truly wants. When someone orders four, yes four pork chops, or when someone finishes their chicken fried steak, eggs over easy, hashbrowns and biscuit, only to say ‘I think I’ll go for another…’ you do it. You just do it. No opinion expressed. Unless of course they are a regular customer, that is. This is the exception to the poker face. You can pass judgment (playfully) all you want on anything someone orders if you’ve shared a laugh with them before. You can bug them about the same ugly shirt they always wear or about how gross what they order is or even about how much they talk and how much you never have time to listen. All in good fun.
The Poker Face comes in handy with people who have no teeth and muscle spasms, with people covered in tattoos, extraordinarily hot older men, people who speak only French/Spanish/Russian, and people who, before they inhale their greasy hashbrowns and biscuits and gravy, say grace. A waitress should never give out her true feelings about a customer. Otherwise other customers will notice that they aren’t getting truth, they’re only getting a Poker Face.
Also, with the food, though it is easy to do so, one cannot be prejudiced with taking orders. Not only men order pork chops. Not all women want vinaigrette dressing. If someone wants you to mix half orange juice and milk together for their kid, you do it only after clarifying that this is what she truly wants. When someone orders four, yes four pork chops, or when someone finishes their chicken fried steak, eggs over easy, hashbrowns and biscuit, only to say ‘I think I’ll go for another…’ you do it. You just do it. No opinion expressed. Unless of course they are a regular customer, that is. This is the exception to the poker face. You can pass judgment (playfully) all you want on anything someone orders if you’ve shared a laugh with them before. You can bug them about the same ugly shirt they always wear or about how gross what they order is or even about how much they talk and how much you never have time to listen. All in good fun.