[[Scene: Fall of the Cresta]]
[[Another backdated scene! Sorry readers! Takes place on the 5th of July, just like Stan, all the crap that happened to Daryan and... Well, the 5th was bad for the Gavinners all around.]]
Klavier: *Klavier walks through the hall towards Payne's office, hands stuffed in his pockets. He whistles a few bars from 13 Years Hard Time as he reaches Payne's office; knocking loudly on the door. He hopes the older prosecutor is in now -- as much as he'd rather send his secretary to do this, it's already been proven that she can't be trusted anyways.*
Payne: *Payne looks up from his desk where he's seated behind... well, let's call it a mountain of paperwork. Most of it is backdated from the day before, but he'd been too caught up in his preparations against fireworks and his subsequent dinner with Lana, so it just built up. Plus, somebody had dumped about three more large piles on his desk, so that wasn't helping, and he irritably stands up and walks towards the door, throwing it open* Yes? What do you- oh. Gavin. What are you doing here?
Klavier: *Klavier looks over Payne's shoulder and gestures to the mountain of paperwork. He makes an impressed whistle, tilting his sunglasses down* My, Herr Payne... Is that all yours? And they say I am the worst when it comes to paperwork...
Payne: Hmph. Somebody decided to drop six or seven new cases on me out of the blue, so I'm far more behind than I usually would be. *The rookie killer glares at Klavier, tapping his foot irritably* Anyway, what do you need? I can't imagine you'd want to spend your Saturday here if you didn't have a reason, what with your... rock and rolling, and your... your socializing.
Klavier: *Klavier stares for a moment at Payne, thinking he cannot possibly be serious* ... Herr Payne, you are joking, right? ... You are aware that half of those are my files, ja? It seems the secretaries had a bit of a mix-up last night.
Payne: ...So that's it, is it? You've fallen so far you've come to steal my cases, Gavin? Pitiful... but understandable. *He grins, doing that forehead-tappy thing before walking back towards his desk- his office is rather small, so this doesn't take very long* But, as I'm sure you'll find if you look, every one of these cases has me listed as the prosecutor. Hee hee hee...
Klavier: *Klavier saunters over to Payne's desk, pushing his sunglasses up. He grabs one of the folders off the prosecutor's desk and flips it open, smirking.* "Assigned Prosecutor: K. Gavin". *he points to the top of the first document in the folder, where the information is printed* Right there.
Payne: ...So they spelled my name wrong on one file. Your point?
Klavier: *Klavier grabs another folder, flipping it open* "K. Gavin." is on this one too. *he takes hold of a third* See? This one too says... *he closes the file when he sees Payne's name written at the top, tossing the folder on the floor as he reaches for a new one* Aha, "K. Gavin" here too.
Payne: *As Klavier rummages through the files, Payne starts to sweat- even if the man is sorting his paperwork for him, it's still rather annoying* You... you upstart! Did it not occur to you that possibly they inadvertently swapped our names on accident?
Klavier: *Klavier slams his fist on Payne's desk* THAT DOES NOT MAKE ANY SENSE!
Klavier: *Klavier grits his teeth* You are speaking crazy, Herr Payne. I speak Englisch and German but I most certainly do not speak crazy.
Payne: *He recoils a bit at Klavier's outburst, but quickly recomposes himself* Hee hee hee... you're forgetting, Gavin, that I've had over a decade of experience over you. Why, just six years ago, they swapped myself and Manfred von Karma's names on accident. Hee hee hee... it's not as illogical as you may think. *He conveniently leaves out the fact that it was on a document that listed who had bought lunch outside of the office that day from an in dependant study done by the newspaper*
Klavier: *Klavier slowly tilts his sunglasses down, eyes locking on Payne. He stares, just watching Payne for a moment more. Slowly, he brings his hand up towards Payne's face, holding out one finger and poking the older man in the forehead, pushing him back gently* Is it lonely, way up there on your pedestal?
Klavier: Your... awfully delusional pedestal?
Payne: *the finger-poke startles him enough that he steps backwards a bit, tripping over and landing in his chair* Y-you...! You have no right to say that type of thing to me, Gavin! I'm over ten years your senior, and many more than that your elder..!
Payne: So pay me some respect, you... you rookie!
Klavier: *Klavier looks absolutely baffled as he folds his arms and tilts his head, eyes locked on Payne* ... Are you drunk, senile or just plain dumb, Herr Payne?
Payne: ...Hmph. Can't say I'm surprised that you don't understand. *He starts to shift through the paperwork, sorting out the cases between two piles* If you're going to continue to assert that these are your cases, Gavin, I ask two questions.
Payne: Firstly, if they're yours... why are they here?
Payne: And secondly... how in blazes do you manage to keep up with so many cases when you're as lazy as you are?
Klavier: *Klavier sighs -- he's had a long and rough day (albeit, somewhat hilarious when he learned what actually happened to Daryan) at this point and Payne's tone is not making things any easier. The young prosecutor takes a deep breath, running a few lyrics through his head to keep his cool.* Herr Payne...
Klavier: *Klavier straightens out, pushing his glasses up his nose* Firstly, it happened because my secretary is not always the brightest -- she would rather look at my winning smile than sort my files, you know? *he offers Payne a charming smile; giving him a taste of what his secretary sees so often*
Klavier: And secondly... *he steps across the tiny office, standing beside the book shelf. He gives a small shrug* It is a mystery. *he leans his entire weight against the bookcase. The entire structure begins to move -- Klavier neglected to notice the wheels on the bottom.*
Payne: *The rather heavy bookcase starts to roll across the wooden floors, veering straight towards the window. Payne just sits in shock and watches as it builds up speed, crashing directly through his (rather small) window and falling seven stories to the street below. There's silence for a moment as it falls, and then a loud 'CRUNCH' as it hits something.* That... that...
Klavier: *Klavier is watching in awe as it all unfolds; as if in slow-motion. A wide grin forms across his face as he whispers* Schön...
Payne: *There's a kind of silence again, and then a car alarm goes off. Payne continues to sit in shock, staring out the gaping jagged hole in his window* G... Gavin...
Klavier: J-ja, Herr Payne? Was ist denn los? *Klavier inches over towards the desk, quietly scooping up the folders that belong to him*
Payne: *Payne slams his hands down on his desk, rising- a vein on his forehead is very visible, and it looks as if he's about to explode* Do you even know what you've just done?
Klavier: Ahh... *Klavier offers a sheepish grin, slowly backing up towards the door* Is... that your car?
Payne: *walking over towards Klavier, Payne points a finger at him dramatically* Is your guitar just a guitar, Gavin?
Klavier: *Klavier clutches his files to his chest, gritting his teeth a bit* Nein. My guitars... a like my lovers...
Payne: *Payne shakes his head, his face showing both his anger and something else... could it be mourning?* My Cresta... is precisely like that. Do you understand what you've done now?
Klavier: *another sheepish grin crosses the prosecutor's face as he gives a bit of an apologetic shrug* I am... sure you can buff that right out.
Payne: Buff it out? *Payne steps to the window, glancing out it momentarily before recoiling- the damage is extensive, and it hurts him to see his baby like that* There's a bookcase embedded in the roof, Gavin.
Payne: How am I supposed to buff out a bookcase through the roof?
Klavier: I... I... *Klavier searches for some kind of witty reply; wondering for a moment what Herr Edgeworth would do in this situation. He clears his throat, standing tall* I hear the ladies love a man who is well read, ja? Bookcase in his car -- how much more learned can you get?
Payne: ...Gavin. *Payne gets rather fiercely logical during times of intense emotional stress involving his card, and it shows* There are several... problems, with that statement. First off... I'm married.
Klavier: *Klavier gasps, clapping a hand against his cheek* You are married? Congratulations, Herr Payne!
Klavier: How long has it been? A month? Less?
Payne: *The glare doesn't fade at this show of overly-dramatic surprise- if anything, it intensifies* Twenty-four years next month. *he pulls out his wallet, presenting a photo of what appears to be a super model* My wife, Mildred. She... doesn't look quite like this anymore, of course...
Klavier: *Klavier squints at the photo* ... What did she do in a past life to end up with you?
Payne: I believe she helped the poor in Zimbabwe or something. *he clears his throat, going back to his original point* Secondly... there's a bookcase. Through the roof of my car. That should stand by itself.
Payne: And thirdly... *he points dramatically once more* I believe you owe me some money, Gavin. Changing the subject won't get you off the hook.
Klavier: Money...? *Klavier tilts his head* ...Are you driving without insurance, Herr Payne?
Payne: ...*and the sweat is back* Of course not, Gavin. That's... against the law.
Payne: *it clicks, and he recoils, squeaking a bit* Y-you're not saying... you are off the hook?!
Klavier: *Klavier puffs his chest out, putting the file under his arm as his hands move to his hips. He tilts his head down a bit, looking over the frame of his sunglasses -- reminding Payne of a certain blue-suited, spikey-haired rookie he faced once* I believe I am.
Payne: *the mental image of Phoenix Wright simply serves to make Payne sweat more, and he recoils again* Y-y-you... you won't get away with this, Gavin! I'll... I'll sue, that's what I'll do!
Klavier: Oh? *Klavier remains in the pose, raising an eyebrow* With what case, Herr Payne? An accident in your office? An accident involving a... Rookie who does not know any better?
Payne: I could- I would just- ...Grrrrr... *if people could steam, Payne would be steaming* I'll get you for this, Wr- Gavin! Just... just you watch... you won't get away with destroying my car!
Klavier: *Klavier steps back, standing in the door frame with a smirk* Oh, Herr Payne...I believe I just did.
Payne: I don't know how... *he turns back to his desk* I don't know where... *he sits down* But I will get my revenge for this, Gavin. *He spins his chair around to face the window*
Klavier: *Klavier exits Payne's office, a bit of a spring in his step as he heads towards the elevator, intending to drop off these files and then head home. As he reaches the elevator and presses the up button, it hits him -- the way he was posing a moment ago, in front of Payne. He knows who it reminded him of. He shudders a little, brushing off the front of his shirt in an attempt to feel clean again. Trying to shake the thought from his head, he decides to think about what he should grab for dinner... and if Daryan ate all those Goldbears.*
Klavier: *Klavier walks through the hall towards Payne's office, hands stuffed in his pockets. He whistles a few bars from 13 Years Hard Time as he reaches Payne's office; knocking loudly on the door. He hopes the older prosecutor is in now -- as much as he'd rather send his secretary to do this, it's already been proven that she can't be trusted anyways.*
Payne: *Payne looks up from his desk where he's seated behind... well, let's call it a mountain of paperwork. Most of it is backdated from the day before, but he'd been too caught up in his preparations against fireworks and his subsequent dinner with Lana, so it just built up. Plus, somebody had dumped about three more large piles on his desk, so that wasn't helping, and he irritably stands up and walks towards the door, throwing it open* Yes? What do you- oh. Gavin. What are you doing here?
Klavier: *Klavier looks over Payne's shoulder and gestures to the mountain of paperwork. He makes an impressed whistle, tilting his sunglasses down* My, Herr Payne... Is that all yours? And they say I am the worst when it comes to paperwork...
Payne: Hmph. Somebody decided to drop six or seven new cases on me out of the blue, so I'm far more behind than I usually would be. *The rookie killer glares at Klavier, tapping his foot irritably* Anyway, what do you need? I can't imagine you'd want to spend your Saturday here if you didn't have a reason, what with your... rock and rolling, and your... your socializing.
Klavier: *Klavier stares for a moment at Payne, thinking he cannot possibly be serious* ... Herr Payne, you are joking, right? ... You are aware that half of those are my files, ja? It seems the secretaries had a bit of a mix-up last night.
Payne: ...So that's it, is it? You've fallen so far you've come to steal my cases, Gavin? Pitiful... but understandable. *He grins, doing that forehead-tappy thing before walking back towards his desk- his office is rather small, so this doesn't take very long* But, as I'm sure you'll find if you look, every one of these cases has me listed as the prosecutor. Hee hee hee...
Klavier: *Klavier saunters over to Payne's desk, pushing his sunglasses up. He grabs one of the folders off the prosecutor's desk and flips it open, smirking.* "Assigned Prosecutor: K. Gavin". *he points to the top of the first document in the folder, where the information is printed* Right there.
Payne: ...So they spelled my name wrong on one file. Your point?
Klavier: *Klavier grabs another folder, flipping it open* "K. Gavin." is on this one too. *he takes hold of a third* See? This one too says... *he closes the file when he sees Payne's name written at the top, tossing the folder on the floor as he reaches for a new one* Aha, "K. Gavin" here too.
Payne: *As Klavier rummages through the files, Payne starts to sweat- even if the man is sorting his paperwork for him, it's still rather annoying* You... you upstart! Did it not occur to you that possibly they inadvertently swapped our names on accident?
Klavier: *Klavier slams his fist on Payne's desk* THAT DOES NOT MAKE ANY SENSE!
Klavier: *Klavier grits his teeth* You are speaking crazy, Herr Payne. I speak Englisch and German but I most certainly do not speak crazy.
Payne: *He recoils a bit at Klavier's outburst, but quickly recomposes himself* Hee hee hee... you're forgetting, Gavin, that I've had over a decade of experience over you. Why, just six years ago, they swapped myself and Manfred von Karma's names on accident. Hee hee hee... it's not as illogical as you may think. *He conveniently leaves out the fact that it was on a document that listed who had bought lunch outside of the office that day from an in dependant study done by the newspaper*
Klavier: *Klavier slowly tilts his sunglasses down, eyes locking on Payne. He stares, just watching Payne for a moment more. Slowly, he brings his hand up towards Payne's face, holding out one finger and poking the older man in the forehead, pushing him back gently* Is it lonely, way up there on your pedestal?
Klavier: Your... awfully delusional pedestal?
Payne: *the finger-poke startles him enough that he steps backwards a bit, tripping over and landing in his chair* Y-you...! You have no right to say that type of thing to me, Gavin! I'm over ten years your senior, and many more than that your elder..!
Payne: So pay me some respect, you... you rookie!
Klavier: *Klavier looks absolutely baffled as he folds his arms and tilts his head, eyes locked on Payne* ... Are you drunk, senile or just plain dumb, Herr Payne?
Payne: ...Hmph. Can't say I'm surprised that you don't understand. *He starts to shift through the paperwork, sorting out the cases between two piles* If you're going to continue to assert that these are your cases, Gavin, I ask two questions.
Payne: Firstly, if they're yours... why are they here?
Payne: And secondly... how in blazes do you manage to keep up with so many cases when you're as lazy as you are?
Klavier: *Klavier sighs -- he's had a long and rough day (albeit, somewhat hilarious when he learned what actually happened to Daryan) at this point and Payne's tone is not making things any easier. The young prosecutor takes a deep breath, running a few lyrics through his head to keep his cool.* Herr Payne...
Klavier: *Klavier straightens out, pushing his glasses up his nose* Firstly, it happened because my secretary is not always the brightest -- she would rather look at my winning smile than sort my files, you know? *he offers Payne a charming smile; giving him a taste of what his secretary sees so often*
Klavier: And secondly... *he steps across the tiny office, standing beside the book shelf. He gives a small shrug* It is a mystery. *he leans his entire weight against the bookcase. The entire structure begins to move -- Klavier neglected to notice the wheels on the bottom.*
Payne: *The rather heavy bookcase starts to roll across the wooden floors, veering straight towards the window. Payne just sits in shock and watches as it builds up speed, crashing directly through his (rather small) window and falling seven stories to the street below. There's silence for a moment as it falls, and then a loud 'CRUNCH' as it hits something.* That... that...
Klavier: *Klavier is watching in awe as it all unfolds; as if in slow-motion. A wide grin forms across his face as he whispers* Schön...
Payne: *There's a kind of silence again, and then a car alarm goes off. Payne continues to sit in shock, staring out the gaping jagged hole in his window* G... Gavin...
Klavier: J-ja, Herr Payne? Was ist denn los? *Klavier inches over towards the desk, quietly scooping up the folders that belong to him*
Payne: *Payne slams his hands down on his desk, rising- a vein on his forehead is very visible, and it looks as if he's about to explode* Do you even know what you've just done?
Klavier: Ahh... *Klavier offers a sheepish grin, slowly backing up towards the door* Is... that your car?
Payne: *walking over towards Klavier, Payne points a finger at him dramatically* Is your guitar just a guitar, Gavin?
Klavier: *Klavier clutches his files to his chest, gritting his teeth a bit* Nein. My guitars... a like my lovers...
Payne: *Payne shakes his head, his face showing both his anger and something else... could it be mourning?* My Cresta... is precisely like that. Do you understand what you've done now?
Klavier: *another sheepish grin crosses the prosecutor's face as he gives a bit of an apologetic shrug* I am... sure you can buff that right out.
Payne: Buff it out? *Payne steps to the window, glancing out it momentarily before recoiling- the damage is extensive, and it hurts him to see his baby like that* There's a bookcase embedded in the roof, Gavin.
Payne: How am I supposed to buff out a bookcase through the roof?
Klavier: I... I... *Klavier searches for some kind of witty reply; wondering for a moment what Herr Edgeworth would do in this situation. He clears his throat, standing tall* I hear the ladies love a man who is well read, ja? Bookcase in his car -- how much more learned can you get?
Payne: ...Gavin. *Payne gets rather fiercely logical during times of intense emotional stress involving his card, and it shows* There are several... problems, with that statement. First off... I'm married.
Klavier: *Klavier gasps, clapping a hand against his cheek* You are married? Congratulations, Herr Payne!
Klavier: How long has it been? A month? Less?
Payne: *The glare doesn't fade at this show of overly-dramatic surprise- if anything, it intensifies* Twenty-four years next month. *he pulls out his wallet, presenting a photo of what appears to be a super model* My wife, Mildred. She... doesn't look quite like this anymore, of course...
Klavier: *Klavier squints at the photo* ... What did she do in a past life to end up with you?
Payne: I believe she helped the poor in Zimbabwe or something. *he clears his throat, going back to his original point* Secondly... there's a bookcase. Through the roof of my car. That should stand by itself.
Payne: And thirdly... *he points dramatically once more* I believe you owe me some money, Gavin. Changing the subject won't get you off the hook.
Klavier: Money...? *Klavier tilts his head* ...Are you driving without insurance, Herr Payne?
Payne: ...*and the sweat is back* Of course not, Gavin. That's... against the law.
Payne: *it clicks, and he recoils, squeaking a bit* Y-you're not saying... you are off the hook?!
Klavier: *Klavier puffs his chest out, putting the file under his arm as his hands move to his hips. He tilts his head down a bit, looking over the frame of his sunglasses -- reminding Payne of a certain blue-suited, spikey-haired rookie he faced once* I believe I am.
Payne: *the mental image of Phoenix Wright simply serves to make Payne sweat more, and he recoils again* Y-y-you... you won't get away with this, Gavin! I'll... I'll sue, that's what I'll do!
Klavier: Oh? *Klavier remains in the pose, raising an eyebrow* With what case, Herr Payne? An accident in your office? An accident involving a... Rookie who does not know any better?
Payne: I could- I would just- ...Grrrrr... *if people could steam, Payne would be steaming* I'll get you for this, Wr- Gavin! Just... just you watch... you won't get away with destroying my car!
Klavier: *Klavier steps back, standing in the door frame with a smirk* Oh, Herr Payne...I believe I just did.
Payne: I don't know how... *he turns back to his desk* I don't know where... *he sits down* But I will get my revenge for this, Gavin. *He spins his chair around to face the window*
Klavier: *Klavier exits Payne's office, a bit of a spring in his step as he heads towards the elevator, intending to drop off these files and then head home. As he reaches the elevator and presses the up button, it hits him -- the way he was posing a moment ago, in front of Payne. He knows who it reminded him of. He shudders a little, brushing off the front of his shirt in an attempt to feel clean again. Trying to shake the thought from his head, he decides to think about what he should grab for dinner... and if Daryan ate all those Goldbears.*