My "Trampled" Heart
What does the word "trample" really mean? The literal defintion is to beat down with the feet so as to crush, bruise, or destroy; tramp on. But of course, like every other word in the English language, there are many more meanings. Specifically, to treat harshly or ruthlessly.
Zsofia is upset with me. Shocker. And of course, when I ask her what's wrong, I get the, "Nothing." Then I give her a look and again she states, "What? It's nothing." What is it about the female population that they have to conceal all their thoughts, even though some of us guys know that something is bothering them? So I finally get it out of her after dinner, and apparently I let my friends trample all over me.
Please, explain.
I tried telling her why I am always calling my friends (most of the time, all of them call from time to time as well) and why they do not call me. "Why are you always calling them?" she asked. And I tried explaining, but she wasn't having it. So, I say, "I always call you too." But of course, that's different. But it is rarely a time when she actually calls me? So, I ask myself, "If always calling people instead of them calling me, is them trampling all over me, is she trampling over me as well?" Well, no. Because no one is trampling over me. I don't get why this is such a problem for her.
And then I realize today, as I was driving home after dinner, that we have gotten to that stage. The stage where I feel what she feels, I think what she is thinking, I say what she's going to say. And then it hit me, I can't live without her. And all of the silly drama with her and I right now just faded away. Because she's more important to me than anything.
And thus, I have said belief. She has come into my life, unexpectedly, and has managed to win me over, completely, trampling over me. Not harshly or ruthlessly, however. She's trampled over my barrier and has entered into all that is me. She has trampled my heart. My being. She knows me in ways that I don't.
"Underneath this smile my world is slowly caving in. All the while, I'm hanging on instead of letting go. Could you be the one who saves me from every bad habit that has helped me dig this hole? I've been hiding down for miles underneath this smile."
What is this feeling that I feel all the time? Is it a love deeper than I have ever known? Whatever it is, I hope it never goes away, because feeling this way is a natural high...
Zsofia is upset with me. Shocker. And of course, when I ask her what's wrong, I get the, "Nothing." Then I give her a look and again she states, "What? It's nothing." What is it about the female population that they have to conceal all their thoughts, even though some of us guys know that something is bothering them? So I finally get it out of her after dinner, and apparently I let my friends trample all over me.
Please, explain.
I tried telling her why I am always calling my friends (most of the time, all of them call from time to time as well) and why they do not call me. "Why are you always calling them?" she asked. And I tried explaining, but she wasn't having it. So, I say, "I always call you too." But of course, that's different. But it is rarely a time when she actually calls me? So, I ask myself, "If always calling people instead of them calling me, is them trampling all over me, is she trampling over me as well?" Well, no. Because no one is trampling over me. I don't get why this is such a problem for her.
And then I realize today, as I was driving home after dinner, that we have gotten to that stage. The stage where I feel what she feels, I think what she is thinking, I say what she's going to say. And then it hit me, I can't live without her. And all of the silly drama with her and I right now just faded away. Because she's more important to me than anything.
And thus, I have said belief. She has come into my life, unexpectedly, and has managed to win me over, completely, trampling over me. Not harshly or ruthlessly, however. She's trampled over my barrier and has entered into all that is me. She has trampled my heart. My being. She knows me in ways that I don't.
"Underneath this smile my world is slowly caving in. All the while, I'm hanging on instead of letting go. Could you be the one who saves me from every bad habit that has helped me dig this hole? I've been hiding down for miles underneath this smile."
What is this feeling that I feel all the time? Is it a love deeper than I have ever known? Whatever it is, I hope it never goes away, because feeling this way is a natural high...