Me...updated
So hmm how do I feel...I dont know exactly how to describe how I feel except for the word ok...Im not happy, yet I am not sad entirely either. Its strange how emotions can be so complex and folded. I know that what ever hope that I had in me is totally dead now. I know that whatever sliver of optimism that I had is now gone...wow Ive become cynical...no not really, more that I have grasped the stark reality of my situation, and tho I may very much dislike it, I have to come to terms with it. Shes gone.
As for the rest of me that isnt or wasnt her I am doing ok.Its hard to go from one extreme to the other but I am adapting...I kinda feel like an emotional yo-yo but I am starting to have more good days than bad. I am making new friends and I am starting to test the waters so to speak with this whole single thing. Its strange Ive not had to do this in almost five years and its not as much fun as it used to be. I guess that means Im getting older eh? Im done with the high school drama, I dont like the drinking scene as much anymore and I am SO almost done with hanging out in bars. Theres got to be a better way you know?
Oh well I will press on like time, always moving forward, after all what else can you do?
I was described the other day by a friend very interestingly... I was compared to an iceberg, showing only its tip visible above the water with the other 90 percent hidden under the water... It seems strange but some how also very apt.
As for the rest of me that isnt or wasnt her I am doing ok.Its hard to go from one extreme to the other but I am adapting...I kinda feel like an emotional yo-yo but I am starting to have more good days than bad. I am making new friends and I am starting to test the waters so to speak with this whole single thing. Its strange Ive not had to do this in almost five years and its not as much fun as it used to be. I guess that means Im getting older eh? Im done with the high school drama, I dont like the drinking scene as much anymore and I am SO almost done with hanging out in bars. Theres got to be a better way you know?
Oh well I will press on like time, always moving forward, after all what else can you do?
I was described the other day by a friend very interestingly... I was compared to an iceberg, showing only its tip visible above the water with the other 90 percent hidden under the water... It seems strange but some how also very apt.