summary of the worst conversation ever
adam: you were right. cutting is a release.
ami: ...what. why did you do that.
adam: i'm tired of being a shadow in everyone elses' lives.
ami: but you're not in mine.
adam: it sure feels like it. i helped you through your big thing, and then i'm kicked to the curb.
ami: no you weren't.
adam: we drifted. you hardly talked to me. if that's not a sign that you don't feel the way that i do, then i don't know what is.
ami: i'm sorry. i guess i was trying to figure things out. but that didn't mean you couldn't talk to me.
adam: you expect me to welcome you with open arms and be able to talk to you after what you did to me?
ami: why are you trying to push me away?
adam: it's for your own good. i helped you, and now i want you to respect my wishes and leave me alone.
ami: i won't. i won't wake up one morning and see you gone.
adam: you won't even notice. just leave me alone. that's what i want; you've done enough already.
ami: why does this sound like everything i've ever heard before. i won't abandon you though.
adam: you're only hurting me that much more by not doing so.
ami: you're hurting me too. but the difference is you're doing it on purpose.
adam: yup.
ami: stop it.
adam: no. not until i'm a memory of someone who helped you through something.
ami: all i'm going to have left are memories of people if they keep abandoning me.
adam: not like you have anything but memories of me anyway.
ami: you're tarnishing them. all i want is to help you.
adam: you expect me to accept that? how can someone who hurts me, help me?
ami: because i love you just the same. you're hurting me, but i'm still here.
adam: i'm telling you how i feel. i'm telling you what you did.
ami: i know. and i'm telling you i'm not leaving.
adam: i'm glad i could help you, and i'm glad we were happy at some point. now i'm asking you to leave. i don't need help.
ami: lying to yourself won't do anything.
adam: it's not lying, it's acceptance. i may need help, but not from you. there will be too much hurt under anything you do.
ami: so you just want to throw it away.
adam: what was there to throw away? i helped you, and you're better. now i fade off into the shadows. this is how it's always been. i pour my soul into something, then get shattered. but it's okay because we can still be friends~*~*~*
ami: ...how i can i trust you not to leave.
adam: i helped you, then spit out.
ami: :/ no
adam: i don't know.
ami: me neither.
x
i need a smoke
ami: ...what. why did you do that.
adam: i'm tired of being a shadow in everyone elses' lives.
ami: but you're not in mine.
adam: it sure feels like it. i helped you through your big thing, and then i'm kicked to the curb.
ami: no you weren't.
adam: we drifted. you hardly talked to me. if that's not a sign that you don't feel the way that i do, then i don't know what is.
ami: i'm sorry. i guess i was trying to figure things out. but that didn't mean you couldn't talk to me.
adam: you expect me to welcome you with open arms and be able to talk to you after what you did to me?
ami: why are you trying to push me away?
adam: it's for your own good. i helped you, and now i want you to respect my wishes and leave me alone.
ami: i won't. i won't wake up one morning and see you gone.
adam: you won't even notice. just leave me alone. that's what i want; you've done enough already.
ami: why does this sound like everything i've ever heard before. i won't abandon you though.
adam: you're only hurting me that much more by not doing so.
ami: you're hurting me too. but the difference is you're doing it on purpose.
adam: yup.
ami: stop it.
adam: no. not until i'm a memory of someone who helped you through something.
ami: all i'm going to have left are memories of people if they keep abandoning me.
adam: not like you have anything but memories of me anyway.
ami: you're tarnishing them. all i want is to help you.
adam: you expect me to accept that? how can someone who hurts me, help me?
ami: because i love you just the same. you're hurting me, but i'm still here.
adam: i'm telling you how i feel. i'm telling you what you did.
ami: i know. and i'm telling you i'm not leaving.
adam: i'm glad i could help you, and i'm glad we were happy at some point. now i'm asking you to leave. i don't need help.
ami: lying to yourself won't do anything.
adam: it's not lying, it's acceptance. i may need help, but not from you. there will be too much hurt under anything you do.
ami: so you just want to throw it away.
adam: what was there to throw away? i helped you, and you're better. now i fade off into the shadows. this is how it's always been. i pour my soul into something, then get shattered. but it's okay because we can still be friends~*~*~*
ami: ...how i can i trust you not to leave.
adam: i helped you, then spit out.
ami: :/ no
adam: i don't know.
ami: me neither.
x
i need a smoke