(no subject)
Look Who’s Talking
Chapter 21
Title: Who Needs Wedding Crashers When You’ve got Friends Like Ours?
Fandoms: Super Junior(main), DBSK, SHINee, BigBang.
Pairings: currently, Kangteuk, GTOP, Jaeho, but others developed and revealed later.
Genre: Comedy with mild angst and sap.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Kangin and Leeteuk are the picture perfect couple and they have it all, or so Kangin thought, until Leeteuk gets them into a situation involving several children, each with a mind of their own.
Warning: AU and sexual themes, some later chapters will contain sexual content.
A/N: Earlier chapters available ask and you shall receive.
Kangin would have passed the mini-mart had he not been on auto pilot that morning. But who could blame him, the parking lot resembled nothing of its former self.
“It’s-it’s…”
“Awe we gowing to Heban?” Eunhyuk asked from the back seat.
“We might just be, Eunhyuk,” Kangin mumbled. “It’ll probably turn out more like Hell though.”
They pulled into the parking lot, all of them gawking at the white decorations that covered anything that would stay still. There were bows, banners, lace, rugs, ribbons; anything and everything white.
“What was he thinking?” Junsu mumbled, his eyes still trying to take in the retina-burning urethral whiteness of the once-normal parking lot.
“Mind you, Junsu, that requires the belief that the man actually thinks… I don’t believe he’s capable of thought.”
Junsu nodded, sighing, as they came to a complete stop. He was debating not getting out of the car; just hiding in there until the whole thing was over and then going to Yoochun with puppy dog eyes and a pout. It had gotten him out of trouble before.
“You can’t, you know… I’ll know where you are, and Yoochun would find a way to get it out of me. Besides, I honestly believe you want to marry him.” Junsu looked over at the burly man, confused. Kangin was never thought to be the insightful one, but he had just said the one thing Junsu knew.
Instead of waiting for Junsu to agree or say anything Kangin just got out of the car and began to go to the back to unload his and Leeteuk’s little ‘treasures’. Junsu sighed and got out to help him.
They were quickly spotted by Yunho who was barking orders at one of the decorators; he quit that effort and began to make a bee-line for them.
“Heads up,” Kangin told Junsu when he spotted their devious looking friend.
Junsu glanced up too and sighed, pulling the last child on his side out of the vehicle.
“Hey you two, you’re late. You’re now behind in setting up tables… and where is Tablo?”
“He had to run home quickly for something,” Kangin spoke up on the absentee’s behalf.
“Well then you two are on your own until he gets back. Chop, chop!” Yunho smirked.
“And what are you doing exactly?” Kangin asked, grabbing Donghae’s hand before he took Yunho’s advice and karate chopped a butterfly on Yesung’s finger.
“I was awarded, as best man, the title of overseer. I get to watch all of you and tell you what to do.” He puffed his chest out proudly.
“Wait… so the groom has to do work, but the best man doesn’t? Where is the sense in that?” Kangin asked holding tight to Donghae who was trying to wiggle out of his grasp.
“No I still have very labor-intensive work; I’m saving the groom from having this harsh task of keeping you goons in line.”
“How very kind of you,” Kangin said, rolling his eyes but otherwise letting the matter drop. “What do you propose I do with these eight little buggers?”
“I’ve made a playpen for Changmin, and all of the children, we’ll just put them in that. I’ll take them, you two get to work!”
Kangin was surprised, but went with Junsu towards the mini mart anyways.
“Who wants cookies? Follow uncle Yunho. Come on!” Yunho said, successfully getting all eight children to follow him. This was a piece of cake; why did Kangin complain so much?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Leeteuk and Jaejoong pulled into the nimbus-parking lot several hours after Kangin and Junsu had already begun setting up. The parking lot was still the same brilliant white that was starting to blind them all.
Leeteuk got out of the van. He and Jaejoong (mostly Jaejoong) had been driving around that day running all of the last minute errands. Leeteuk immediately went to the back of the van and heaved open the large double doors to reveal several flower arrangements. He grabbed the box that contained the largest of arrangements. The large glass vase and elegant arrangement of red roses intended for the bride and grooms table proved to be heavier than he had expected. He debated asking Jaejoong for some assistance with that one but decided against it on behalf of his pride. Instead, he readjusted the awkward arrangement and made his way towards the mini-mart, which, for some strange reason, seemed unusually far away.
He managed to make it into the mini-mart just fine, only having it almost slip through his fingers seven or eight times. Once he was inside of the former grocery store he searched for the spot intended for the flowers, oblivious to all else but the larger front table the bride and groom were to be seated at.
“Umma! Umma! Gwess what mweanie Unho did!” Leeteuk craned around the large array of flowers to see the one toddler he didn’t want anywhere near him when there was something fragile close by.
“Donghae, sweetie, can this wait?”
“Bwut Umma!”
“Just a minute, I need to set this down.”
“Umma Appa twold me not to hurt unho… but he pwut me in a cwage! Can I pwease?”
“No Sungmin, do not touch him, now please take Donghae and go play someplace else please.”
“Leeteuk, your friends are even more screwed up than our family and that is saying something.”
“Heechul, please, can you take your brothers somewhere else to play right now?” He almost whimpered under the strain of the vase on his arms.
“Where can we go? We just escaped that contraption Yunho had us stuck in.”
Leeteuk tried to shift the vase to ease some of the strain only managing to make it more awkward and uncomfortable “Trap you?” Leeteuk asked holding back a scream of frustration as a wall of children blocked him from his destination.
“He called it a playpen, but all he did was shove some shelves together to lock us all in.”
“Heechul, I need to get to that table! Can you please move for a second?”
“You aren’t even listening to my problem. I have been mocked!” The toddler stamped his foot indignantly.
“I’ll put this down and then I’ll go deal with it.”
“What are you going to do?” Heechul asked skeptically.
“I’ll talk to him and find a place for you kids to go today,” Leeteuk promised biting his lip to keep from squealing in pain.
“You better,” Heechul said, still disbelieving, and pushed Donghae roughly to the side.
Leeteuk didn’t stop to chastise the boy for bullying his younger brother he just rushed forward and dropped the vase noisily onto the table. He sighed audibly in relief and rubbed his arms.
Finally, he turned around to deal with his children, the only problem being that most of them were gone. Donghae smiled brightly up at him from the position Heechul had shoved him into on the floor.
“Where are all of your brothers?” Leeteuk tried asking to no avail. Donghae just kept beaming up at him. “Where is Eunhyuk?” That got him a reaction. Donghae’s lip curled downward and his arms folded stiffly across his chest. He thought to ask the child where Junsu was but decided against it knowing the sensitivity towards the topic. Instead he scooped up his child into his still very shaky arms. “Let’s go look for him, shall we?” Donghae smiled even more brightly and nodded.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It wasn’t difficult to find the groom. He and Kangin were busy shoving tables into their designated places, Tablo in heel, placing down tablecloths. Jaejoong followed Tablo with the flower arrangements, setting them on the center of the clean, white linen-covered tables, his husband nagging him as he went along. Eunhyuk was somewhere along the procession helping Junsu and Kangin push, tugging tablecloths for Tablo, but otherwise not being much help.
Donghae fidgeted in his captor’s arms, and Leeteuk decided to let him down. How much trouble could he be out here with all these adults around? As soon as both of Donghae’s feet hit the ground he charged towards the older toddler who was attempting to assist his brother with his tablecloth task. The poor child was taken by surprise as he and Donghae collided. Leeteuk gasped in horror, before he saw Donghae snake his arms around the other boy’s waist as they fell under the table and out of sight.
“AHHHHHH!!!”
‘shush monkey it’s just me!’ Donghae beamed in the dimness provided by the tablecloth.
‘What’d you do that for? You scared me!’
‘you left me… And I had to get out of there all by myself!’
‘But Junsu needed my help…’
Donghae’s head drooped and he turned away from his brother pouting.
‘Hae…?’
‘go help him then Monkey.’ Donghae sniffled a bit.
‘But Hae… what if you helped too?’
‘You didn’t want my help before…’
‘You usually don’t like helping.’
Donghae turned around eyes slightly glistening ‘…oh yeah…’
‘Do you want to help then?...’ Eunhyuk asked still very confused.
‘Nope!’ Donghae giggled. ‘Let’s go play Monkey!’
‘But I want to help…’ Eunhyuk lowered his head almost in shame.
‘You are really weird Monkey… I’m going to go play, you have fun helping.’ Donghae ruffled Eunhyuk’s hair before darting of out from under the tablecloth, followed slightly later by a much less enthusiastic Eunhyuk. He looked around to find where Kangin and Tablo had laid themselves around the floral arrangement on the very last table. Yunho was telling them off for just about everything but it was falling on deaf ears. Jaejoong was glancing around in attempts to find an escape. Leeteuk was affectionately patting Junsu on the shoulder.
Target spotted, Eunhyuk ran over to the exhausted man and smiled up at him cutely, tugging on his pant leg.
“Eunhyuk, didn’t you want to go play with Donghae?”
The child shook his head and tugged more fervently on the adult’s pant leg. Junsu smiled and obliged lifting Eunhyuk from the ground to cradle him in his arms. “You’re always there for me Eunhyuk, that’s why you are my real best man,” he mumbled holding the boy tight.
“What was that?” Yunho’s ears perked up at the mention of best man. “Did you call me?”
“No, Yunho… I simply said there goes the crazy best man.” Junsu smiled down at Eunhyuk and winked. The three-year-old attempted to wink back but really only accomplished scrunching up one side of his face rather cutely.
“I’ll have you know I am the best best man there ever was! You’ll see when the surprise comes…” He looked down at his watch, “…in about five minutes.”
“Surprise?” Junsu asked, feeling a prickle of unease at the man’s words.
“You’ll see… and you’ll love it.” Junsu doubted that but there was no stopping the crazed man.
“Tables are completed, what now, Overseer?” Kangin asked from his spread-eagle position on the table.
“Relax for now… you’ll have your hands full in a minute, trust me,” Yunho said, a malicious smile spreading over his handsome face.
“Oh, how gracious our slave driver is,” Tablo commented before breaking out into fits of giggles joined shortly by Kangin.
“Where are Jiyong, Seunghyun and the kids?” Leeteuk asked, noting the silence and relative order of the place.
“They should be here any minute,” Yunho commented, reassuringly glancing at his watch.
“Great… then the real fun begins,” commented Kangin sarcastically.
“That was the plan actually,” Yunho chirped, bouncing away before anyone could inquire further into the practically clinically insane man’s plan.
“Uhm… what did he mean?” Junsu asked a tad nervously.
“Not a clue… but I have a feeling we’re not going to like it,” Kangin replied, sitting up on the table.
“What do you think his surprise could be?” Junsu asked as he began pacing back and forth, clutching the toddler to his chest tightly for support and comfort.
“Knowing Yunho, it could be anything from a naked Yoochun to an entourage of people to witness your wedding; it’s really not safe to say…”
Junsu groaned and clutched Eunhyuk more tightly.
“Junsu.” Leeteuk said carefully, placing a hand on the frantic man’s shoulder, “why don’t you give me Eunhyuk and make yourself some tea in the lounge to calm you down a bit?”
Junsu blinked. “That’s probably a good idea, okay.”
“Relax; Kangin will come retrieve you when you are needed,” Leeteuk told him as he took the child from his arms, and gently nudged the troubled groom.
Junsu turned and left as directed. Kangin leaned over towards Tablo and extended him a small bottle. “Slip this into his tea, it will ease him up a tad better.”
Tablo glanced at the ounce or so of Whiskey and smirked. “Don’t you think he’ll notice?”
“Right now he’s so preoccupied he probably wouldn’t notice if we had Yoochun parading around in drag.” Kangin winked at Tablo.
“Good point,” Tablo agreed and took the alcohol before exiting the congregation to “help” the groom relax.
Leeteuk tsked at the two’s plan.
“You know it’ll be good for him, it worked this morning,” Kangin defended himself from his scolding husband.
“You didn’t?” Leeteuk asked, horrified.
“He needed something, and the idiot “best man’s” plan to chock him full of coffee was a horrific failure, mine at least got him to sleep.”
Leeteuk just shook his head looking at Eunhyuk and sighed. “Go play with your brothers… wherever they may be.” He set Eunhyuk on the ground, freeing him.
Eunhyuk hugged his leg reassuringly before running off in search of his siblings. It didn’t take him long to find none other than Heechul with a handful of red roses that had to have come from the center pieces. He carefully approached the boy as he was cooing over them.
‘Aren’t they pretty, Hannie collected them for me.’ He thrust the roses into Eunhyuk’s face filing his lungs with the perfumed floral scent.
‘They are beautiful, Heechul.’ Eunhyuk smiled.
‘I know. Hannie is such a sweetheart.’
Eunhyuk nodded tentatively watching Heechul cradle the stolen flowers.
‘The arrangements were off; I was fixing them when Heechul came up complaining how he never got flowers from anyone, and here Junsu got a whole room full. I just evened them out and gave Heechul the extras in a napkin so he wouldn’t get pricked with the thorns.’ Han Geng shrugged nursing his own cut and scraped hands.
‘Maybe I should do something like that for Donghae. He was upset earlier…’
‘What would Donghae do with flowers?’ Han Geng looked at Eunhyuk thoughtfully. ‘You’d be better off finding him something he could use to hunt his aliens.’
‘Good idea! Thanks! I’m going to go look!’
Han Geng nodded and smiled, examining his hands once more; Heechul didn’t even acknowledge him, still cooing over his flowers.
Eunhyuk left now in search of an alien catching instrument. He didn’t see anything that looked even remotely useful, or alien. All he saw were tables, chairs, flowers, and lots and lots of white cloth. He did however happen upon two more of his siblings, one of whom didn’t seem all that pleased.
‘Han Geng got Heechul flowers and you can’t even spare me a hug?!’ Sungmin looked more than a little disgruntled with his arms crossed and his nostrils flaring in apparent anger. ‘You like those stupid books way more than you have ever liked me. You don’t even play soap opera with me anymore. I hate you!’ Sungmin stalked off, leaving a confused Kyuhyun leaning up against a chair. Eunhyuk noticed that his eyes had begun to glass over before Kyuhyun quickly and angrily blinked it away.
Eunhyuk quietly and carefully approached his brother. ‘Are you okay?’
Kyuhyun looked over at Eunhyuk and sneered. ‘I’m fine. Like I’d let that affect me.’
‘Kyuhyun…’
‘I said I was fine, okay.’
Eunhyuk blinked at him. ‘I may not be as smart as you, but you look hurt to me.’
‘I’m fine, Eunhyuk…’ Kyuhyun didn’t look angry, in fact now more of the sorrow was breaking through as he sunk to a sitting position on the floor.
‘I don’t think he hates you… I just think he’s jealous.’ Eunhyuk moved forward and laid a hand on his brother’s shoulder.
‘I… I just don’t know how to make him happy… None of the books I have read contain anything like it either…’
Eunhyuk frowned, glancing at Kyuhyun who looked confused, lost, and broken. ‘Maybe I can help… You should try writing him a poem!’
Kyuhyun blinked. ‘A poem?’
Eunhyuk nodded excitedly. ‘I saw it work on television. He’ll love it!’
‘Sungmin was always one for sappy things… but I have no pen and paper…’
Eunhyuk smiled. ‘Not to worry I know this store like I know that monkeys are scary. I’ll be right back, don’t move!’ Eunhyuk rushed off leaving a very confused and still saddened Kyuhyun to contemplate.
‘Poetry… shall I compare thee to a summers day? ... To Shakespearian… My love for you burns with the intensity of a thousand suns… nope to cliché. I can’t write poetry what was I thinking?’ He tilted his head back against the chair and curled his knees into his chest deciding he’d have to wait for Eunhyuk to come back and tell him that it just wouldn’t work.
Eunhyuk came back triumphantly with a pink crayon and a binder full of papers. ‘There is writing on the front but the back is blank, I don’t think Sungmin will mind too much and I got his favorite color!’
‘It’s pointless Eunhyuk. I can’t write poetry…’ Kyuhyun hung his head in shame.
Eunhyuk looked taken aback. ‘But… But… It’s easy… You just have to rhyme.’
‘I can’t… I just can’t Eunhyuk we’ll have to come up with something else.’
Eunhyuk shook his head. ‘It’s easy I’ll show you.’ He tapped his leg in a consistent rhythm.
‘You say you hate me,
But I just can’t let that be.
You make me happy,
Don’t you see?
You are a good friend,
My best friend, Minnie.’
‘See; simple.’ Eunhyuk grinned.
‘How did you… you write poetry?’ Kyuhyun gapped in disbelief.
Eunhyuk giggled shaking his head. ‘Nah, it’s just a rhyme, Tablo writes them a lot, and I used to try and help.’
Kyuhun could do nothing more than blink at his brother, honestly stunned. He would never have expected this from Eunhyuk, and he knew the boy better than any of his other brothers simply because they had been together the longest. ‘That is very impressive, Eunhyuk.’ Kyuhyun could think of nothing else to tell his brother. ‘Do you mind if I use those lines exactly?’
‘Go ahead; what would I do with them, Silly?’
‘Uhm… do you remember them…’ Kyuhyun looked down sheepishly. Eunhyuk chuckled and smiled before reciting his work back for Kyuhyun slowly enough that the boy could copy it down properly.
When finished, Kyhyun tore the paper from the binder and handed it and the crayon back to Eunhyuk. ‘Thank you so much,’ he said, wrapping his arms awkwardly around Eunhyuk’s waist in an attempted hug. ‘I owe you one, thank you so much.’
Eunhyuk patted his brother on the back. ‘Nah, I liked helping… unless of course you knew of a place I could find something that might help Donghae in his alien hunting…’
Kyuhyun released his younger brother and blinked. ‘Well, there was a metal colander back on the shelves Yunho had used for our entrapment; he would probably like that…’
Eunhyuks face lit up. ‘That’s perfect, thanks, Kyu! Good luck with the poem!’
Kyuhyun nodded and smiled as Eunhyuk wobbled off towards the awkward arrangement of shelves that were situated in the back of the former mini mart. He scanned the perimeter of the fortress and easily located the hole that had offered his brothers their escape. He ran towards it and smoothly entered into the enclosure and gazed around at the fully stocked shelve walls, and the three remaining inhabitants.
Changmin appeared in the middle if a pile of boxes and wrappers, his face and hands a dead give away to the feast he had taken part in. The other two were at the other end, a set of headphones being shared between the two.
‘Whatcha doing?’ Eunhyuk approached Ryeowook and Yesung.
‘Unho gave it to us, when we were put in here and no one else wanted anything to do with it so Yesung and I took it.’ Ryeowook gestured to the small black mp3 player that was situated in between the two toddlers. Yesung nodded, confirming Ryeowook’s statement.
‘What are you listening to?’ Eunhyuk looked slightly intrigued.
‘It’s something about this girl who has the wrong number and won’t quit calling this poor guy.’ Yesung shrugged. ‘At least that’s what it seems like but we think there may be a deeper meaning.’
‘I wish I could sing like this…’ Ryeowook frowned his foot shaking to the beat, Yesung nodded in agreement.
‘Maybe you two should practice, you could sing something for Yoochun and Junsu… Su would really like that!’ Eunhyuk started bouncing at his own idea. ‘I’ll go get Donghae and Han Geng and we can all dance while you two sing!’
‘That’s a great idea!’ Ryeowook hopped to his feet. Yesung smiled and got up a tad less enthusiastically.
‘I’ll be right back! You two pick a song and start practicing!’ Yesung and Ryeowook nodded fervently as Eunhyuk ran back out of the collection of shelves and into the makeshift reception hall.
‘Now to find Hae…’ He began to search by running around the tables checking underneath them for his missing friend and paying no attention to the commotion at the door.
Animal crates were being unloaded and brought into the mini-mart and stacked just inside of the door. This was all being over seen by none other than Seunghyun, and Jiyong was happily explaining, to a pale Leeteuk and Kangin, the contents of the crates.
“Yep, we have a parrot, a porcupine, an iguana, a monkey… the monkey is the coolest! He wears a little hat and dinner jacket and takes pictures with people.” Jiyong gestured to the bottommost crate.
“But why, why are there animals at this wedding?!” Kangin asked incredulously.
“Oh, Yunho wanted them. TOP has this little party service he started up when we went to host Tae and Dae’s second birthday party… It’s just expanded from there.”
“There were no animals there,” Leeteuk chimed in weakly.
“Of course there weren’t; his set wasn’t complete at that point, and we had baby Ri then, what kind of parents do you think we are?! We would never put an infant around live animals.” Jiyong looked offended.
“You still never answered why there are live animals at a wedding of all things,” Kangin asked using his thumb and middle finger to massage his temples in attempt to ward off an inevitable migraine.
“To spice things up, my dear Kangin. My goal has been to make this wedding one to remember for years and years to come… and it will be.” A crooked grin spread on the maniacal best man’s face.
“Have you told Junsu yet?” Leeteuk asked, somewhat worriedly.
“Of course not, the surprise is the best part of all of this. Our sweet little groom is blissfully unaware of everything.”
“He’s going to have a heart attack… Leeteuk did you bring the defibrillator?” Kangin asked, only half joking.
Leeteuk didn’t hear his husband’s mock question he was too busy watching Tablo run towards them.
He skidded to a halt in front of the group looking frantic. “Our groom he’s… well he’s… What’s with all the crates?”
“Oh that’s our…” Yunho’s happy explanation was cut short by a hand in front of his mouth; Leeteuk’s in fact.
“What’s wrong with Junsu?” the worried motherly male asked.
“Well… He’s slightly drunk… and crying hysterically…”
“Why?!” Leeteuk asked almost hysterical himself.
“Well I gave him that shot of whiskey in his tea, and he drank it all rather quickly… but it was probably the stuff in the fridge we both mistook for orange juice.”
“That was supposed to be the groom’s toast before the wedding!” Yunho exclaimed, frantic. “How much of it is left?”
“None…” Tablo bit his lip.
“Fuzzy navels for a toast, who uses that? I know we’re all gay but come on?!” Jiyong asked incredulously, rolling his eyes. “You need something harder, good thing I always come prepared.”
“What about Junsu; he’s crying?!” Leeteuk asked frantically.
“And very drunk,” Jiyong added nonchalantly, “and to think I thought this wedding was going to be boring.”
“What’s wrong with Junsu?!” Everyone snapped around to see a very nervous and worried Yoochun.
“Uhm… Well…” Tablo stammered nervously.
“Tablo got him drunk and now he’s hysterical,” Yunho claimed, shaking his head at the man.
“He didn’t!” Leeteuk jumped in front of a shaking Tablo before Yoochun could react. “Yunho’s pre-wedding toast was mistaken for orange juice and Junsu drank it, which is how he ended up rather inebriated, and crying.”
The anger dropped from his face instantly and replaced with concern. “Why is he crying?”
“I don’t know,” Tablo said stepping around Leeteuk. “He wouldn’t tell me what was wrong.”
“I’ll find out,” Yoochun declared making his way for the break room.
“You can’t. It’s bad luck for him to see you before the wedding!” Yunho yelled at the retreating man.
“Watch me,” Yoochun hissed threateningly, still proceeding toward the break room, followed by Tablo, Leeteuk, Kangin, and unfortunately, an unhappy Yunho.
He nearly broke the door to the break room as he shoved it open, to find Junsu on the floor face in hands and crying heavily into his palms. He rushed over to his soon to be husband and kneeled down to capture him in a protective embrace from behind. Junsu jumped and attempted to whip around and see his captor. He got a glimpse of his fiancé and broke down even harder.
“Y-yoochun, I’m so s-sorry!” he sobbed, grasping the arms that now surrounded him and holding them closely to him.
“What’s wrong, Su?” Yoochun asked, more than a little confused.
“I-I-I never told you… never told you t-that I love you… I w-was j-just angry, about the wedding… a-and being a bride… I di-didn’t t-tell you that I-I loved you, b-but I do, and I d-do want to m-marry you, b-because I love you. But I was m-mean and I-I just fought you and…”
“Shhh… Su I know.” Yoochun softly kissed the man on the top of his head. “I know you didn’t want a big wedding, you didn’t want a wedding at all, but you have done it, everything for me, because I wanted everyone to know that you are mine, and that I love you… You did this all for me. That’s love Su, and I never doubted your love for a second.”
Junsu hiccupped and smiled softly. “I love you….” he said, gently leaning back into his fiancé’s chest.
“I love you too… but there are a few more people I have to show that to. Don’t we have a wedding we should be proceeding with?” Yoochun asked, kissing his lover on the cheek this time.
“Yeah, and you’re ruining it.” Yunho tapped his foot at Yoochun, glaring evilly down at him. “Junsu wasn’t supposed to see you for 24 hours before the wedding.”
“Look at Mr. Traditional over here,” Yoochun mocked, still holding tightly onto his now calm fiancé. “Since when was anything done by the book around here?”
“Since I was put in charge,” Yunho said matter-of-factly.
“And who put you in charge?” Yoochun asked smirking. “Oh yeah… you did come to think of it.” He un-snaked his arms from his almost-husband and sighed. “Better get going before the boss blows a gasket. Love you baby, see you in a few hours. I’ll be the one walking down the aisle in white.” He pecked him on the cheek and stood, allowing himself to be gripped by the wrist and dragged from the room by a fuming Yunho.
Kangin stepped forward with a fresh, dry, cup of coffee for his inebriated friend. “That should help for now… It’s the best I can do…”
Junsu nodded and bid a soft thank you, sipping the very hot liquid quietly.
“Puts a whole new spin on being hammered on your wedding,” Tablo stated with a smirk, looking down at the man on the floor. Junsu hiccupped in his coffee, causing him to spill a drop or two.
“Let’s leave Junsu for a few minutes to sober up on his own,” Leeteuk suggested kindly. Tablo and Kangin nodded for a moment in agreement when several screams beyond the door could be heard.
“Do we have to go out there?” Kangin asked Leeteuk with a convincing pout playing on his lips. “We could always just stay in here away from all of our crazy friends.”
Tablo chuckled, and Leeteuk glared at his significant other when another scream froze the laughing man.
“Eunhyuk?” he said softly before pushing past both men and out of the room into absolute pandemonium. Animals had somehow escaped their cages and were now roaming free in the reception hall. He couldn’t see Eunhyuk anywhere so he started jogging and scanning for the toddler. Luckily Eunhyuk screamed once more and Tablo took off in the direction of the noise, through a maze of tables and chairs.
He came across Jiyong’s prized monkey trying to climb up one of the chairs that held his brother, who stood stationary in terror, his hand outstretched enclosed in Donghae’s who was trying futilely to tug the boy up onto the table without any assistance.
Tablo grabbed Eunhyuk first, separating the toddlers’ hands and tucking him under one arm before grabbing Donghae and doing the same under his other arm before running away from the primate, who decided to pursue the trio, or at least until Tablo jolted Donghae just enough to drop the bit of banana he had clenched in his tiny fist. The monkey desisted to instead focus on the food and Tablo was able to carry both boys to the relative safety of the play pen. He plopped both boys into the entrapment to join the still chowing Changmin and Yesung and Ryeowook who both looked very flustered.
“I’ll get the rest… wherever they got to…” Yunho claimed loudly, an annoyed look exaggerated on his face aimed solely at Kangin, obviously blaming him for all the trouble.
“Which one of the little brats let out all my animals in the first place?!” Jiyong asked, cradling his prized monkey who had relaxed just like a baby into his owner’s arms.
“I’ll give you a hint, he’s mischievous, and he has a slight obsession with extra terrestrials.”
“He likes transvestites?! Kangin what have you done to poor Heechul, the poor thing. He can’t have been like that when you found him! I’m calling a social worker… better yet I’m telling Leeteuk you’re a terrible father and he must divorce you to save the children from your madness!” Yunho ranted tapping his foot at the so claimed poor father.
Kangin just rolled his eyes as he dropped a surprisingly subdued and smiling Sungmin into the play pen, before retrieving a pleased looking Kyuhyun from his side to put him along with his companion.
“Put me down this instant! Help, Leeteuk! Anyone! I’m being molested!” Heechul claimed as he was carried by a very sleepy and sullen Jaejoong toward the pit.
“How do you know what molestation is by four?” Kangin asked, walking away from the pit in search of more children, wondering for an instant if maybe what Yunho had said was true.
“You were the one who picked me up from the whore house, and you ask those ridiculous questions still… You’re a lot dumber than you look you know.” Heechul smirked as he was placed into the pen.
“Next time just throw him in, his head’s big enough to protect his brain from any damage, not that it would do much of anything to that twisted mind.”
“Kangin!” Leeteuk yelled coming up from behind holding one of Han Geng’s sloppily bandaged hands.
“Didn’t you hear that snot nosed little brat’s comment about me?” Kangin asked indignantly at his husband.
“Don’t call Heechul a brat!” Leeteuk chastised picking Han Geng up from the ground and lifting him over the shelve that was acting as a wall at the moment. “I’m sorry HeeChul, but there really is no other place for you guys to be while we set up, I’ll make it up to you by taking you shopping on my next day off though.”
“That’s alright Umma, I’m sure we can find something to do in here.” Heechul coated his face in a false sugar coated smile and aimed it full blast at his gullible mother.
“But… But…” Kangin gaped openly at the two.
“No buts Mister! He’s our baby and you should treat him better. Now apologize!” Leeteuk said turning from his son to his husband.
Kangin gritted his teeth and looked over Leeteuk’s shoulder to see Heechul standing and smirking in triumph.
“I’m sorry,” he gritted out forcefully his fingers crossed childishly behind his back.
“That was a pathetic apology Kangin, but this time I guess I’ll have to let it slide.” Leeteuk shook his head.
“Yeah because it’s time for us to get the final touches in order,” Yunho declared his maniacal smirk back on his face. “Oh and chalk one up for the four-year-old!”
Kangin turned a steady glare on the gloating best man.
“Last touches? What can Kangin help with?” Leeteuk volunteered his husband happily.
“The actual ceremony is in the back and the chairs and arch need to be arranged and set up accordingly.” Yunho stated, “Nothing Kangin and Tablo can’t handle.”
“What will you and I be up to?” Leeteuk asked looking curious.
“We get to make sure they’re doing it right and that everything else is in order.” Yunho smiled at Leeteuk, and Kangin groaned. Yet again he found himself asking, ‘Why him?’