(no subject)
so i just got back from dropping off some notes from my last econ class to my buddy nick who happens to live in the same apartment complex as amber. i passed by her apartment the first time and didnt notice anything out of the ordinary. on my second pass on my way out i noticed a certain someone's car parked outside her place. it was him, her ex whom she is, to the best of my knowledge, with again. doesnt bother me that they are together, but rather that she doesnt have the guts to tell me. what with that? of course i would have been upset to hear this, but it would be alot easier to get over than to have found out this way. how can i come to such conclusions? well considering that she told me that if she were to do anything tonight, i would be her only option. why the lies? is it that "i dont want to hurt him" crap? cause thats bullshit! im so numb right now im barely able to type this out. after everything i do for her without asking for anything what so ever in return, she cant just tell me the fucking truth? thats all i ask for. especially when she comes out and says she doesnt want to hang out with myself and one of our friends because she cant handle this other friend of hers hitting on me. that she still has all these "feelings" for me and is too having a hard time dealing with it. i dont know, i just cant trust any words that come out of her mouth anymore. sadly this is an issue that only a bottle can help. the only words i can trust are those on the back of a litre of jack.