sadness
today has been the hardest so far. Nathan was great all morning, took a nice long nap and everything. But pretty much since he woke up he was fussy until just now, when I finally got him to calm down, eat, and go to sleep. After all the crying he did he should sleep pretty good. But it was so hard. I was already upset and frustrated and really missing chris and then on oprah they started talking about men who have died in Iraq and reading the last letters they wrote home before they died. That really set me off. I was crying so hard I could barely stand. I just wanted to fall to my knees and cry and cry. I know it sounds dramatic, but thats just how I felt. My legs felt weak and I felt so alone and just missed Chris so much. April says Im not allowed to watch Oprah anymore, or atleast not for a week. LOL. I know things are going to get better. Well, I'll still miss him a whole lot, but I'll start handling it better. I hope so anyways. I have to stay strong for Nathan, I know he needs me.
I was proud of myself before. I got some good stuff done. Folded laundry, went through a bunch of baby stuff that I got from April and decided what to keep and what to donate. I just dont need all of it...its way too much. Anyways, as much as I got done today there's still a lot to do, more stuff to go through and whatnot. But I cant think of how much it is or I'll get overwhelmed. One step at a time.
well, i got a few small things to take care of and then its off to sleepy land.
I was proud of myself before. I got some good stuff done. Folded laundry, went through a bunch of baby stuff that I got from April and decided what to keep and what to donate. I just dont need all of it...its way too much. Anyways, as much as I got done today there's still a lot to do, more stuff to go through and whatnot. But I cant think of how much it is or I'll get overwhelmed. One step at a time.
well, i got a few small things to take care of and then its off to sleepy land.