(no subject)
So I feel like spilling my guts.
I hung out with Aaron yesterday which was real good and real bad at the same time.
It was amazing being with him. We had so much fun together, and all my feelings came back to me.
Something is defintaely holding me back though. I know its not the right thing to be with him deep down. I do still love him, and I have so many feelings for him. We kissed and it felt amazing. It just made everything so much harder. I realized I can't keep doing this to him, leading him on and knowing deep down i cant be with him. It sucks so bad, but thats life I guess. I wish there was an easier way to go about all of this. I have a bad feeling that if we got back together, once I got ot school again, things would be different. I wish we could be friends, but thats not possible. I want to be able to talk to him, but I cant. I wish I could keep kissing him, but I cant. I have felt so lost and confused. And it really wasnt fair for me to keep doing that to Aaron. Ahhh....
and I continue to be confused. . .
Thats just like a real short explaination of how i feel . . and i couldnt even say exactly how i feel because for some reason I cant even figure myself out.
Life=sucky right now. . and i wish I were still at school.
But i am trying to make the best of whats going on. I have lots of good friends, and being around them makes everything so much easier.
I hope someday he can be happy and I can be happy.
So many people go through this, so I know we can do it too.
AHHHHHH!!!!!!
I hung out with Aaron yesterday which was real good and real bad at the same time.
It was amazing being with him. We had so much fun together, and all my feelings came back to me.
Something is defintaely holding me back though. I know its not the right thing to be with him deep down. I do still love him, and I have so many feelings for him. We kissed and it felt amazing. It just made everything so much harder. I realized I can't keep doing this to him, leading him on and knowing deep down i cant be with him. It sucks so bad, but thats life I guess. I wish there was an easier way to go about all of this. I have a bad feeling that if we got back together, once I got ot school again, things would be different. I wish we could be friends, but thats not possible. I want to be able to talk to him, but I cant. I wish I could keep kissing him, but I cant. I have felt so lost and confused. And it really wasnt fair for me to keep doing that to Aaron. Ahhh....
and I continue to be confused. . .
Thats just like a real short explaination of how i feel . . and i couldnt even say exactly how i feel because for some reason I cant even figure myself out.
Life=sucky right now. . and i wish I were still at school.
But i am trying to make the best of whats going on. I have lots of good friends, and being around them makes everything so much easier.
I hope someday he can be happy and I can be happy.
So many people go through this, so I know we can do it too.
AHHHHHH!!!!!!