Breathing Through Silent Blocks 6a
Title: Breathing Through silent Blocks 6a
Author: Dri
Fandom: Glee
Pairing: Puck/Kurt, past Sam/Kurt
Rating: R
Word Count: 1413
Genre: AU, Future Fic, mentions of past mpreg
Summary: Breathing through life.
Disclaimer: They are so not mine, but I get to keep Ben for myself!
Author’s note:That's it, the final chapter. I broke it in two parts because it got too long - just like this fic, really. I'd like to thank a very kind group of people who was always there to show me their support. You guys are wonderful! And thanks everybody who gave this fic a chance. Still unbeta-ed; all mistakes are mine.
Comments are framed, cherished and loved!
*g*l*e*e*
Sam had been the one to first introduce Kurt to the German Village in Columbus.
Drawn to its friendly atmosphere, his late husband couldn’t get enough of lazing around that neighborhood surrounded by colorful gardens and stone sidewalks, parks with flowers and plants of exotic colors and textures. Carrying his ancient professional Nikon, the one which required rolls of films and plenty of hours in Sam’s dark room to have them developed, Sam had spent many quiet afternoons chatting up with the locals, good people who stood proud of their heritage and of the place their German immigrant ancestors had first settled in the early-to-mid 19th century. Sam had also loved to take picture after picture of the neighborhood’s unique architecture made of large red-brick houses with wrought iron fences along tree-lined streets. Sometimes Kurt would tag along and indulge Sam by posing for his lenses in various stages of distress and elation, sometimes making faces, other times bitching about the damage the flash would do to his skin, every once in a while smiling with Sam when they found a kind soul to take a picture of them together, always glad for having Sam share his passion with him, even if Kurt didn’t totally understand it.
Sam caressed Kurt’s flat belly, raising goose bumps on the skin still hot and sweaty after their lovemaking. “The pictures are for our great-grandchildren. Serious, Peach, they’ll never believe we had once been young and wrinkle free without proof.” Kurt pulled on his husband’s ever long hair and Sam yelped. “Jesus, Kurt! What was that for?”
“Wrinkles is a word to never, ever again be associated with me, do you understand?”
Sam laughed. “You’re nuts, Peach.”
Kurt pulled on Sam’s hair again, this time to bring him down for a kiss. “More respect to the father of your child.”
Sam grinned and moved down to lavish Kurt’s belly with kisses; Kurt laughed. “Don’t mind your papa, baby. He knows daddy is crazy about him. And he’s crazy about me. And we are crazy about you. Yeah, we are. We…”
Sam moved up again to come face to face with his husband. Slowly their laughter died down and they just stared at each other. The awe caused by the miracle they had both created and just found out Kurt was carrying shone brighter and brighter in Sam’s eyes until a tear fell, then another, and then another. Sam’s beautiful face grew blurrier too and moments later both were crying, kissing and making love again.
“I love you,” Sam said moving deep inside of Kurt, “Father of my child, my miracle bearer.”
“The man you will grow wrinkle-free old with,” Kurt choked with laughter, pleasure and tears.
“Forever young, Peach,” Sam gasped when he came seconds after Kurt had cried his name in release, “And happy, and free.”
His Sam, so happy and free; his forever golden boy.
Kurt snapped back from the memories and looked down at Mercedes, responding to the slight tug on the arm linked with hers and smiled apologetically.
“What’s going on in this pretty head of yours?”
He considered stalling for a little longer; but keeping what was going on in his mind to himself would make this whole trip pointless. Kurt knew exactly what he wanted, what he needed to do the moment he had invited Noah, Finn and Mercedes for brunch. Considering the way she had stuck to his side and his brother had been keeping Noah entertained a few feet behind them, so did Mercedes and Finn.
Kurt took a deep breath and started making true his first resolution of the year. “So many things, Cedes, but most of all it’s Sam. I’ve been thinking about him a lot lately.”
“More than usual?”
“Not more, Cedes, it’s just been different. I can close my eyes and see him happy and healthy, you know? I can see the boy and the man he used to be before he got sick without…” Kurt weighed the words, chose carefully and smiled; talking about Sam didn’t have to be a struggle, not anymore. “I can be thankful for what we created together, for Ben; for seeing him in our child and still be able to smile.”
Mercedes kissed his cheek and rested her head against his arm. “I’m happy for you, Kurt.”
Kurt dropped a kiss on the top of her head and they kept walking in silence.
They headed south, towards S. High Street, browsing a few store windows every now and then, but Kurt’s heart wasn’t really into appreciating the local art. As Schiller Park got closer, his heart beat faster and he tugged hard at Mercedes’ arm. She patted his hand and entwined her fingers with his, urging him forward until they reached the corner of S. High and Whittier, where they stopped to wait for Finn and Noah.
Kurt closed his eyes trying to breath through the anxiety shaking his limbs.
“Your hands are sweaty,” Mercedes said, moving her hand up and down his arm, her many rings rasping the wool of his coat. “Do you want me to talk to him?”
“He deserves to hear it from me, Mercedes,” Kurt protested, ignoring the bile rising in his throat, its bitterness almost making him gag.
“You will talk to him, Kurt, just not now.” Unlinking their arms, she immediately stepped in front of Kurt and caught both of his hands in hers. “He will understand, baby. He always does.”
“Until when, Cedes?”
Kurt glanced over Mercedes’ shoulder, just for a second. It was enough to make whatever Noah had seen in his face make Noah quicken his steps, Finn hot on his heels.
“I’ll talk to him. You go ahead and keep walking or there will be no stopping Puck,” Mercedes said. Then she squeezed his hands and turned to talk to Noah.
But Kurt was stuck in place watching Noah watch them with the same apprehension and vulnerability he had shown very early in the morning, when he had carried Ben to the bedroom to be fed, without knowing what was his place in his own house, in Ben and Kurt’s lives.
“That’s okay, Puck. Kurt and I will just head over to the park for a little while,” Mercedes said, making it clear the subject was not open for negotiation. “We’ll be right back.”
But Noah knew. From where they stood, they could see the top of the leafless trees in Schiller Park, and Noah knew what the place meant to Kurt and to Sam.
“Kurt?”
Let me go with you.
Such an awkward, pathetic whisper of a question, a plea that made Kurt want to hold Noah in his arms, kiss the pain away and never let go. But in order to embrace the present and welcome the future, Kurt had to let go of the past. Do it by himself, for himself, for the life he wanted with Noah, with Ben, perhaps with another baby or two.
It was for them, Kurt silently told himself, forcing his eyes to meet Noah’s in mute apology. “I promise it’s just for a little while.”
Noah clenched his jaw and looked away. “Whatever, Hummel. We’ll be shooting pool at Gresso’s. You know where it is?”
“Around here, right?”
“About two blocks down the street,” Noah said without looking at him, already on the move. “You coming or not, Hudson?”
“Yeah, be there in a minute.” Finn walked past the human barrier that was Mercedes to stop in front of Kurt. “You okay? Want me to talk to him, to, to tell him?”
Kurt assented, forcing out a smile. “Take care of him for me, please.”
“You bet, bro,” Finn said, a crocked smile tugging the corner of his lips.
Kurt was so out of it, he didn’t bat his brother’s hand away when messed with Kurt’s hair before turning to jog down the street and catch up with Noah.
“You ready?” Mercedes asked sliding an arm around his waist.
Kurt couldn’t breath watching Noah walking away from him again, but he nodded at Mercedes and told her that yes, they could go.
Mercedes pressed herself to his side and together they crossed the street so Kurt could finally start over, going back to the last place in town he had been with his family and Finn before Sam was taken to the hospital for the last time, never to be home again.
*g*l*e*e*
To be concluded in 6b.
Author: Dri
Fandom: Glee
Pairing: Puck/Kurt, past Sam/Kurt
Rating: R
Word Count: 1413
Genre: AU, Future Fic, mentions of past mpreg
Summary: Breathing through life.
Disclaimer: They are so not mine, but I get to keep Ben for myself!
Author’s note:That's it, the final chapter. I broke it in two parts because it got too long - just like this fic, really. I'd like to thank a very kind group of people who was always there to show me their support. You guys are wonderful! And thanks everybody who gave this fic a chance. Still unbeta-ed; all mistakes are mine.
Comments are framed, cherished and loved!
*g*l*e*e*
Sam had been the one to first introduce Kurt to the German Village in Columbus.
Drawn to its friendly atmosphere, his late husband couldn’t get enough of lazing around that neighborhood surrounded by colorful gardens and stone sidewalks, parks with flowers and plants of exotic colors and textures. Carrying his ancient professional Nikon, the one which required rolls of films and plenty of hours in Sam’s dark room to have them developed, Sam had spent many quiet afternoons chatting up with the locals, good people who stood proud of their heritage and of the place their German immigrant ancestors had first settled in the early-to-mid 19th century. Sam had also loved to take picture after picture of the neighborhood’s unique architecture made of large red-brick houses with wrought iron fences along tree-lined streets. Sometimes Kurt would tag along and indulge Sam by posing for his lenses in various stages of distress and elation, sometimes making faces, other times bitching about the damage the flash would do to his skin, every once in a while smiling with Sam when they found a kind soul to take a picture of them together, always glad for having Sam share his passion with him, even if Kurt didn’t totally understand it.
Sam caressed Kurt’s flat belly, raising goose bumps on the skin still hot and sweaty after their lovemaking. “The pictures are for our great-grandchildren. Serious, Peach, they’ll never believe we had once been young and wrinkle free without proof.” Kurt pulled on his husband’s ever long hair and Sam yelped. “Jesus, Kurt! What was that for?”
“Wrinkles is a word to never, ever again be associated with me, do you understand?”
Sam laughed. “You’re nuts, Peach.”
Kurt pulled on Sam’s hair again, this time to bring him down for a kiss. “More respect to the father of your child.”
Sam grinned and moved down to lavish Kurt’s belly with kisses; Kurt laughed. “Don’t mind your papa, baby. He knows daddy is crazy about him. And he’s crazy about me. And we are crazy about you. Yeah, we are. We…”
Sam moved up again to come face to face with his husband. Slowly their laughter died down and they just stared at each other. The awe caused by the miracle they had both created and just found out Kurt was carrying shone brighter and brighter in Sam’s eyes until a tear fell, then another, and then another. Sam’s beautiful face grew blurrier too and moments later both were crying, kissing and making love again.
“I love you,” Sam said moving deep inside of Kurt, “Father of my child, my miracle bearer.”
“The man you will grow wrinkle-free old with,” Kurt choked with laughter, pleasure and tears.
“Forever young, Peach,” Sam gasped when he came seconds after Kurt had cried his name in release, “And happy, and free.”
His Sam, so happy and free; his forever golden boy.
Kurt snapped back from the memories and looked down at Mercedes, responding to the slight tug on the arm linked with hers and smiled apologetically.
“What’s going on in this pretty head of yours?”
He considered stalling for a little longer; but keeping what was going on in his mind to himself would make this whole trip pointless. Kurt knew exactly what he wanted, what he needed to do the moment he had invited Noah, Finn and Mercedes for brunch. Considering the way she had stuck to his side and his brother had been keeping Noah entertained a few feet behind them, so did Mercedes and Finn.
Kurt took a deep breath and started making true his first resolution of the year. “So many things, Cedes, but most of all it’s Sam. I’ve been thinking about him a lot lately.”
“More than usual?”
“Not more, Cedes, it’s just been different. I can close my eyes and see him happy and healthy, you know? I can see the boy and the man he used to be before he got sick without…” Kurt weighed the words, chose carefully and smiled; talking about Sam didn’t have to be a struggle, not anymore. “I can be thankful for what we created together, for Ben; for seeing him in our child and still be able to smile.”
Mercedes kissed his cheek and rested her head against his arm. “I’m happy for you, Kurt.”
Kurt dropped a kiss on the top of her head and they kept walking in silence.
They headed south, towards S. High Street, browsing a few store windows every now and then, but Kurt’s heart wasn’t really into appreciating the local art. As Schiller Park got closer, his heart beat faster and he tugged hard at Mercedes’ arm. She patted his hand and entwined her fingers with his, urging him forward until they reached the corner of S. High and Whittier, where they stopped to wait for Finn and Noah.
Kurt closed his eyes trying to breath through the anxiety shaking his limbs.
“Your hands are sweaty,” Mercedes said, moving her hand up and down his arm, her many rings rasping the wool of his coat. “Do you want me to talk to him?”
“He deserves to hear it from me, Mercedes,” Kurt protested, ignoring the bile rising in his throat, its bitterness almost making him gag.
“You will talk to him, Kurt, just not now.” Unlinking their arms, she immediately stepped in front of Kurt and caught both of his hands in hers. “He will understand, baby. He always does.”
“Until when, Cedes?”
Kurt glanced over Mercedes’ shoulder, just for a second. It was enough to make whatever Noah had seen in his face make Noah quicken his steps, Finn hot on his heels.
“I’ll talk to him. You go ahead and keep walking or there will be no stopping Puck,” Mercedes said. Then she squeezed his hands and turned to talk to Noah.
But Kurt was stuck in place watching Noah watch them with the same apprehension and vulnerability he had shown very early in the morning, when he had carried Ben to the bedroom to be fed, without knowing what was his place in his own house, in Ben and Kurt’s lives.
“That’s okay, Puck. Kurt and I will just head over to the park for a little while,” Mercedes said, making it clear the subject was not open for negotiation. “We’ll be right back.”
But Noah knew. From where they stood, they could see the top of the leafless trees in Schiller Park, and Noah knew what the place meant to Kurt and to Sam.
“Kurt?”
Let me go with you.
Such an awkward, pathetic whisper of a question, a plea that made Kurt want to hold Noah in his arms, kiss the pain away and never let go. But in order to embrace the present and welcome the future, Kurt had to let go of the past. Do it by himself, for himself, for the life he wanted with Noah, with Ben, perhaps with another baby or two.
It was for them, Kurt silently told himself, forcing his eyes to meet Noah’s in mute apology. “I promise it’s just for a little while.”
Noah clenched his jaw and looked away. “Whatever, Hummel. We’ll be shooting pool at Gresso’s. You know where it is?”
“Around here, right?”
“About two blocks down the street,” Noah said without looking at him, already on the move. “You coming or not, Hudson?”
“Yeah, be there in a minute.” Finn walked past the human barrier that was Mercedes to stop in front of Kurt. “You okay? Want me to talk to him, to, to tell him?”
Kurt assented, forcing out a smile. “Take care of him for me, please.”
“You bet, bro,” Finn said, a crocked smile tugging the corner of his lips.
Kurt was so out of it, he didn’t bat his brother’s hand away when messed with Kurt’s hair before turning to jog down the street and catch up with Noah.
“You ready?” Mercedes asked sliding an arm around his waist.
Kurt couldn’t breath watching Noah walking away from him again, but he nodded at Mercedes and told her that yes, they could go.
Mercedes pressed herself to his side and together they crossed the street so Kurt could finally start over, going back to the last place in town he had been with his family and Finn before Sam was taken to the hospital for the last time, never to be home again.
*g*l*e*e*
To be concluded in 6b.