dumb stuff from like three years ago

[drezdyn]

Can't let it out.
Just sit for awhile
and let it build up.
Take it
just a bit longer.
Go home.
Just awhile more.
It's almost night,
the car's ready to go.
The lines building.
Awhile more
until it opens.
We're almost there.
They start to play.
Faint drone,
in my throat
it builds.
Humming is louder,
the guitar rips through calm
as mind floods,
drums crash,
feet crash.
Singing,
screaming
I let loose.
Scream along.
Scream with the music,
it's the only thing there...
music and their energy,...
hot and sweaty,
all their energy.
Music tears apart the room,
so do they,
so do I.
It fills,
crashing,
running into
and through
the room,
the people,
so do I.
Pounding at our heads,
at our bodies,
so do I.
Bodies crash
as we let out our anger.
Our emotions
that have been building
are out.
Take out everything,
nothing escapes.
It's all out
for once,
I'm out,
I'm free.
The music slows
and lights dim.
They leave.
We drag our broken,
bruised bodies
to the cars as they leave.
I still feel the energy
as I sit in the back with the others.
I keep silent
and try to hold onto the energy
but it escapes me.
Slowly it leaves
and with its leaving
its replaced again
by the hollow lump
that pervades my chest cavity.
Reality regains itself
and self is lost.
I close my eyes.
I'll find it again.
Tomorrow night
the process will repeat itself.
Maybe I'll be able to hold on.
Tomorrow I'll hold on.
My music will flow and I won't....
I won't let the emotions in
the next day.
I'll keep my energy
forever.