Reality
I need to start dealing with reality more....or facing up to things that I have a feeling are going to be the truth. The person that I have loved for a very long time isn't getting any better..it seems to be getting worse. How I wish it were not true...bit it is. I need to try and move on with my life...but its hard when you really really love someone. I do not want to admit to myself the way things are..but I need to...I need to find someone to fill the void...I am extremely lonely..I have no one...well..I do have my family...but I have no friends..no friends that are in town...or a short drive away...oh how I miss my friend...its kills me sometimes how much I miss them. They will never come back to live here...I will probably never see them again either. It kills me to type this but its the truth. I dont think I will ever be happy again. I will do whatever I can to help this person...til the end of their days. Oh how I wish things were different..what I wouldnt give to make them get better. But reality is reality and it can be very cruel. o I go on with my lonely life...missing the one I love..wishing I was there with them...I do have hope and I try to believe in it...but reality creeps in and slaps me across the face with truth.