Shadow Of A Dream (2/?)
Olivia Benson is confused. This morning she was running early and therefore got coffee and doughnuts for the guys and still she was the first to enter the precinct.
But that´ s not what´ s got her so mixed up because she actually enjoys the quite and peaceful atmosphere that dominates her working place so very rarely and if, then only on mornings like this.
In fact everything is like it should be, like she expects it to be, everything but her desk. On her desk something changed since she left the precinct yesterday night. Because right in the middle of said piece of furniture rests a small white envelope without any address or name.
Now that is what got her confused, so she sits in her chair, curiously regarding the envelope before taking it and turning it in all possible ways as if that would tell her anything about it´ s insides. But Olivia Benson is a detective and so she detects rather quickly that simply opening the thing up would probably bring her further than just starring at it. She rips the envelope apart and finds a piece of paper inside. The brunette takes it out and, like the envelope, first regards it skeptically, before unfolding it. The neat handwriting on the note looks somehow familiar to the spiky haired detective but she can´ t quite identify whose it might be. Curiously, she begins to read.
The shadow of a dream-that´ s what my mother used to call it. It´ s what you remember of the dreams you have in your sleep. It´ s what you can´ t seem to forget about them. It´ s how subconscious and consciousness connect. It´ s what hunts you in your waking hours-the shadow of a dream. You are such a shadow for me. I had this dream about you and now I can´ t seem to get you out of my head. Each and every fight we have makes my heart rate speed up and my tummy all tingly. Every time our eyes meet I have to look away to not drown in yours. I have to deny most of the offers the guys make to join you at the bar just because I don´ t trust myself if I mix alcohol with the presence of you. And you know what? I am done with it. So I´ m telling you now: you´ re the shadow of my dream. You are so big a shadow you are overshadowing my whole life. I can´ t go on like this and I´ m done letting your shadow hunt me. So I am going to turn it all around. I am going to chase your shadow now and I am going to catch you Olivia Benson.
A. C.
Detective Olivia Benson stares at the words in front of her, mouth hanging slightly open, mind completely blank, desperately trying to calm her furiously beating heart. She reads through the message again and then again and again. But no matter how many times she lets the words pass through her brain, she´ s just not able to grab them, like her head was telling her: “System overload, shut down in 10, 9, 8,”
Wait, the brunette shakes her head to get out of the haze she´ s been in, the writer of the letter…who is the writer of the letter? She takes a closer look at the two capital letters at the end. A. C. … A. C. what kind of a name is A. C.? And then her brain kicks in again. Of course A. C. is not a name, these are initials! Proud of herself that she could save her brain from total shut down she begins pondering about which name those initials could stand for.
A. C. … Abbie Carmichael? No, even if hell froze over, Abbie would never write something like this. If this note would be from the her it would probably say something like: “Hey detective get your sexy ass over in my hotel room ASAP so I can fuck you senseless!” and the times when such notes actually passed between them are long gone. So Olivia Benson throws that thought right back into the dirty black hole that is her past, grabs one of the coffee cups she bought previously, bites into a chocolate covered doughnut and tries again.
It´ s save to say that it is definitely not Carmichael. That´ s just great, Benson. That leaves only a hundred other possibilities what A. C. could stand for! Annoyed she rolls her eyes at herself and takes a deep breath. Relax, you don´ t even know a hundred people whose initials are A. C. so start thinking like the cop you are and exclude those whose are! Several minutes pass and she counts five people that would fit the profile but she is sure that none of them would write such a text for her. So that leaves her right where she started: confused to the bone.
It definitely has to be someone work-related, someone she knows, someone she fights with from time to time, someone who even accompanies them at the bar sometimes. And what about that handwriting-it definitely looks familiar but who the hell…
And then, with the speed of a lightening bolt and the power of an ambos hammer, it hits her, A. C., Alexandra Cabot! Olivia Benson stops dead in her tracks, thoughts running on overload again.
The guys choose this particular moment to enter the squad room but the spiky haired detective is too far gone to notice. Alex Cabot, the Alex Cabot? ADA Alexandra Cabot? The Ice Queen? It can´ t be, that´ s so not possible! In which crazy Never-Ever-Land do you live, Benson?
Her rambling thoughts get broken when she notices a familiar face mere inches away from her own. She flinches back at the sight of Elliot Stabler´ s face in close up. “What the fuck, Elliot!?” she bellows.
“Hi, and a particularly good morning to you, too Liv,” her partner grins, “Thought I should shake you out of that crazy stare you got plastered to you face. It looked pretty much stupid you know?” his grin gets even wider.
“Oh shut the fuck up Elliot!” a still slightly shaken Olivia Benson spits out.
“Woa, calm down partner! Hey guys,” he says half turning towards Fin and Munch who are watching the scene from a safe distance, “better not talk to our favorite female detective here, today,” said female detective throws her partner a warning look, “Seems like somebody has her special week of the month,” Elliot adds and wants to wink at the two other guys but never gets to it because a chocolaty covered doughnut hits him hard, falls to the ground and leaves a deep brown smudge right on Elliot Stabler` s cheek.
“Well thanks very much Liv, that´ s how I like my doughnuts best”, he says sarcastically before wiping the chocolate off of his cheek with his fingers and licking them clean. “You want some, too?” he says raising his hand up in his partner´ s direction. “Cut it Elliot or you´ ll get your coffee the same way you got your doughnut,” Olivia says threateningly.
Just when Elliot is about to open his mouth for some witty retort Cragen enters the office. “Do I want to know why there´ s a doughnut on the floor?” he asks his detectives. “Probably not,” Munch grins while Elliot takes it up and takes a bite. “Hmmmm, still as delicious as ever,” he grins in his partner´ s direction. “Ugh,” Olivia shakes her head.
“Okay stop it,” Cragen says authoritatively, looking at Olivia and Elliot, who now that it was save took the coffee standing on the brunette´ s desk. “You better down that fast because Alex´ s going to be here any second to bring you guys the warrant for the Miller case so we can finally nail this guy with the evidence that´ s going to be in his apartment.”
Olivia Benson has just about enough time to think Alex? Oh shit, when they hear a familiar clicking of heels on the floor and the blonde ADA comes into view.