(no subject)
Having my voice back is amazing!!! i sound like a pre-pubescent boy which kinda sucks but after being mutes for so long saying the words "F*CK YOU" is so satisfying. today was the first day of school and of course people kept wondering about my voice but i decided it was the sexiest voice ever. i wont be having any classes at Outremont. Everything you do you do by yourself. You get the book follow instructions, finish it and leave.
I discovered something pretty f*cked up today. My family has decided I am addicted to food and they've sat there and watch me eat and noted how i eat and what i eat so they can come to this conclusion. they've offered me to eat as a test to see weather i would or not. In fact this whole experience at my aunts and in Florida has been a eating test. I heard that members of my family told my aunt that i eat then get seconds then get someone to get me thirds at parties which is bizarre because i'm never hungry at any of those haitian family parties. I'm very confused. Unless i go blank after each family reunion or dinner something just doesn't sound right about my families diagnosis. But that's not what bothers me really because i know what i eat and how much of it. What puzzles me is that members of my family are watching my every move, my every step, my every mistake and now my every mouthful as a test. I'm not sure how i should feel? i guess i now feel midly self concious and kinda feel like i should be throwing up everything i take in. i feel awfully discusted at my families aproach to this it looks like an intervention for alcohol abuse. i feel betrayed. i feel like an experiment. this just sucks. i didn't think it was that bad (if in fact it's the case)
I just spent a hour trying to tell dim what was wrong with him because i keep comming up with theories on why he acts the way he does and is so exterior to the world i and everyone else lives in. meh i give up. i guess whats wrong with him is incurable if in fact there is something wrong. this is me living my life now. i hate to have unhappy friends or friends that i feel will one day be unhappy or friends that could be happier and ... i don'T know where i'm going with this i guess i just want all my friends to be at an orgasmic level of WHEEEE!!!! in their life.
Work today was ummm blah. new project: building a device that will allow us to teleport ourselves from one place to another. TAKE THAT WINTER!!! (the hot gay indie guys agree and will probably NOT subsidize me)
I discovered something pretty f*cked up today. My family has decided I am addicted to food and they've sat there and watch me eat and noted how i eat and what i eat so they can come to this conclusion. they've offered me to eat as a test to see weather i would or not. In fact this whole experience at my aunts and in Florida has been a eating test. I heard that members of my family told my aunt that i eat then get seconds then get someone to get me thirds at parties which is bizarre because i'm never hungry at any of those haitian family parties. I'm very confused. Unless i go blank after each family reunion or dinner something just doesn't sound right about my families diagnosis. But that's not what bothers me really because i know what i eat and how much of it. What puzzles me is that members of my family are watching my every move, my every step, my every mistake and now my every mouthful as a test. I'm not sure how i should feel? i guess i now feel midly self concious and kinda feel like i should be throwing up everything i take in. i feel awfully discusted at my families aproach to this it looks like an intervention for alcohol abuse. i feel betrayed. i feel like an experiment. this just sucks. i didn't think it was that bad (if in fact it's the case)
I just spent a hour trying to tell dim what was wrong with him because i keep comming up with theories on why he acts the way he does and is so exterior to the world i and everyone else lives in. meh i give up. i guess whats wrong with him is incurable if in fact there is something wrong. this is me living my life now. i hate to have unhappy friends or friends that i feel will one day be unhappy or friends that could be happier and ... i don'T know where i'm going with this i guess i just want all my friends to be at an orgasmic level of WHEEEE!!!! in their life.
Work today was ummm blah. new project: building a device that will allow us to teleport ourselves from one place to another. TAKE THAT WINTER!!! (the hot gay indie guys agree and will probably NOT subsidize me)