Short!fic - Take the Fall For You
Title: Take the Fall For You
Author: Ry (curseangel / dreamsforlease)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Dark. Really dark. Character death. Borderline suicidal ideation.
Characters/Pairings: Dean Winchester.
Summary: Because nakitamanomiko should know better than to discuss random 2x01 AUs with me. xD Basically: JW sacrifices himself for Dean... Sam does, too, and the demon figures, hey, a freebie for a job already done. This is Dean in the aftermath.
Sam dies, and Dean breaks.
This is how long it takes for him to lose everything that makes up his world: One year. It shatters like a mirror dropped on the ground, and the pieces are too small to pick up, cutting his hands over and over. He tries to restructure and refocus, but he can't, not when they're both gone, and they died for him. They died so he could live, when he's already had two shots and had no right to a third run.
He lived, dammit. And every single goddamn night he wonders why.
Probably he's scaring the hell out of Bobby, but he can't really bring himself to care. He hardly notices. When Bobby brings it to his attention that he's freaking out a little, that maybe it'd be a good idea if he stopped spending half his time at somebody's grave, he leaves. It's not running if you walk out the door, right?
Of course he goes back to hunting when he's on his own. He doesn't know anything else. There is nothing else. He doesn't bother being careful, doesn't give a damn if he gets himself killed. Maybe all his dodging mortality and letting his father and brother die for him will be enough to send him to meet them.
The first time one of them proposes to help him out, he tells it to go back to the hell it crawled out of. He even sent it there, after telling it to stop fucking with him.
The second time, he starts to wonder.
He takes the third one up on its offer.
Sam lives. He gets a year.
He stopped giving a damn about whether he lives or dies a long time ago by then, so it seems like a beyond fair deal. Doesn't really matter, anyway - he was supposed to die a while back.
He's just setting things to rights.
Author: Ry (curseangel / dreamsforlease)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Dark. Really dark. Character death. Borderline suicidal ideation.
Characters/Pairings: Dean Winchester.
Summary: Because nakitamanomiko should know better than to discuss random 2x01 AUs with me. xD Basically: JW sacrifices himself for Dean... Sam does, too, and the demon figures, hey, a freebie for a job already done. This is Dean in the aftermath.
Sam dies, and Dean breaks.
This is how long it takes for him to lose everything that makes up his world: One year. It shatters like a mirror dropped on the ground, and the pieces are too small to pick up, cutting his hands over and over. He tries to restructure and refocus, but he can't, not when they're both gone, and they died for him. They died so he could live, when he's already had two shots and had no right to a third run.
He lived, dammit. And every single goddamn night he wonders why.
Probably he's scaring the hell out of Bobby, but he can't really bring himself to care. He hardly notices. When Bobby brings it to his attention that he's freaking out a little, that maybe it'd be a good idea if he stopped spending half his time at somebody's grave, he leaves. It's not running if you walk out the door, right?
Of course he goes back to hunting when he's on his own. He doesn't know anything else. There is nothing else. He doesn't bother being careful, doesn't give a damn if he gets himself killed. Maybe all his dodging mortality and letting his father and brother die for him will be enough to send him to meet them.
The first time one of them proposes to help him out, he tells it to go back to the hell it crawled out of. He even sent it there, after telling it to stop fucking with him.
The second time, he starts to wonder.
He takes the third one up on its offer.
Sam lives. He gets a year.
He stopped giving a damn about whether he lives or dies a long time ago by then, so it seems like a beyond fair deal. Doesn't really matter, anyway - he was supposed to die a while back.
He's just setting things to rights.