(no subject)
Real Quotes From A Real Moron a.k.a Prez George W. Bush
"Arbolist...Look up the word. I don't know, maybe I made it up. Anyway, it's an arbo-tree-ist, someone who knows about trees."
Crawford, TX 8/21/01
"It's your money, you paid for it."
La Crosse, WI 10/18/00
"The Bob Jones policy on interracial dating, I mean I spoke out on interracial dating. I spoke out against that. I spoke out against interracial dating. I support the policy of interracial dating."
CBS News 2/25/00
"I don't read what's handed to me."
New York, NY 3/15/00
"More and more of our imports come from overseas."
Beaverton, OR 9/29/00
"I understand small business growth. I was one."
New York, NY 2/19/00
"Natural gas is hemispheric. I like to call it hemispheric in nature because it is a product that we can find in our neighborhoods."
Austin, Texas 12/20/00
"If affirmative action means what I just described, what I'm for, then I'm for it."
St. Louis, MO 10/18/00
"This is Preservation Month. I appreciate preservation...You gotta preserve."
Nashua, NH 1/28/00
"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?"
Florence, SC 1/11/00
"They Misunderestimated me."
Bentonville, AR 11/6/00
"I think if you know what you believe, it makes it a lot easier to answer questions. I can't answer your question."
Reynoldsburg, OH 10/4/00
"Our priorities is our faith."
Greensboro, NC 10/10/00
"If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator."
Washington, DC 12/18/00
"There's nothing more deep than recognizing Israel's right to exist. That's the most deep thought of all...I can't think of anything more deep than that."
Washington, DC, 3/13/02
"And so, in my State of the my State of the Union or state-my speech to the nation, whatever you want to call it, speech to the nation-I asked Americans to give 4,000 years-4,000 hours over the next-the rest of your life-of service to America. That's what I asked for-4,000 hours."
Bridgeport, CT, 4/9/02
"This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating."
New York, NY 4/23/02
"For a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring alliances of modern times (Dude, it's been like 60 years)."
Tokyo 2/18/02
"I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believeÑI believe what I believe is right."
Rome 7/22/01
"I think we agree, the past is over."
Dallas, TX 5/10/00
The George W. Bush Resume
Past work experience:
- Ran for congress and lost.
- Produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.
- Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas, company went bankrupt shortly after he sold all his stock.
- Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using tax-payer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to Chicago.
- With fathers help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.
Accomplishments:
- Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in America.
- Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city in the U.S.
- Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
- Set record for most executions by any Governor in American history.
Accomplishments as president:
- First president in US history to enter office with a criminal record.
- In his first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.
- Members of Bush cabinet are the richest administration in history. (the 'poorest' multi-millionaire, Condoleeza Rice has a Chevron oil tanker named after her).
- Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.
- Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.
- Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12 month period.
- Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.
- First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in US history.
- After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in US history.
- Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in US history.
- Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12 month period.
- Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in US history.
- Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than any president in US history.
- Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.
- Dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history.
- Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in the history of the world.
- Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in US history. · Withdrew from the World Court of Law.
- Refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
- First president in US history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 US elections).
- All-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.
- First president in US history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
- First president to run and hide when the US came under attack (and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
- First US president to establish a secret shadow government.
- Took the biggest world sympathy for the US after 911, and in less than a year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history).
- First US president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view his presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.
- Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
- Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated US law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts.
- Failed to fulfill pledge to get Osama Bin Laden 'dead or alive'.
- Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capitol building. After 18 months there are no leads or suspects.
- In the 18 months following the 911 attacks he has successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.
- Entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less than two years turned every single economic category heading straight down.
Records and References:
- At least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving record has been erased and is not available).
- AWOL from National Guard and Deserted the military during a time of war.
- Refuse to take drug test or even answer any questions about drug use.
- All records of tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to his fathers library, sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.