I was lucky once. It had to hit some time.
I know it's been a while but here's why. I've been trying to work though a bunch of personal shit of late. It's like treading peanut butter. Sticky and seemingly little progress. I thought I was getting closer to the top of the pit I'd fallen into. Then one friend narrowly dodges death while the other isn't quite quick enough. I lost a good friend last Saturday and it hit me pretty hard. It's a new kind of loss for me and it hurts like hell. It was completely unexpected. He was only 2 years ans 2 days older than me. He was one of the coolest people I'd ever met. Also, he was o e of the geekiest. He could out geek just about anyone any day and made it look cool. I spent alot of fun times with him. I went to the viewing. It was good and bad. Good because it solidified his death in my mind even though it rended my heart all over again. He looked nothing like himself. I could see the glue they hadn't bothered to clean from his lips. The overabundance of makeup on his fingernails and face made him look so game and horrible. He wouldn't have wanted that at all. I went to karaoke and sang Tom Sawyer by Rush, his favorite band. His girlfriend demanded that we come to his funeral in costume. I came as a droog. He would have loved it. The proper eulogy was very fitting. Made people laugh like he did. I know death can happen to anyone anywhere anytime. I had just gotten used to being lucky for a while. I guess. He as definitely one of the brightest which is why thigns look so dark now. I'm going to miss him. I did something impulsive. I know. Big surprise there. I got a memorial tattoo. A cobra emblem. One of my favorite memories of him was at Dragon Con. He and a few others were dressed as cobra footsoldiers and had recorded "Cobra Cares" PSAs for dcon tv. Handed out vote cobra for 2004 buttons too which seemed to me the only sane option that election year. I love and miss you Kristafer Bristow. You were beautiful and always will be.