Friday - Yay!
Friday’s are always so nice and slow. I love that. Means I can work on my stories and or surf the net, read etc. I’m so lazy. All week I’ve been non productive regarding my stories. Perhaps I should stop reflecting and see if I can get a decent ending to Showers?
Well, in a minute.
I’m so torn about cutting my hair. What to do? I haven’t worn it long in a few years and then I used to curl it so it was cute but time consuming. Finally I just started hacking it off inch by inch just experimenting with different styles. I loved Lindsay’s hair on One Life to Live prior to her growing it out so I ended up wearing my hair like that for over a year I think. Now as it’s getting longer and just hanging I’m not liking it.
I so want to cut it! Yet since I’ve been running I’m longing to tie my hair back into a ponytail for the convenience. I’m trying to hang tough and go through the summer without cutting it. My youngest thinks I look nicer with it longer and so does her best friend but short hair is so much easier.
Now my hair isn’t down to my waist; just to my shoulders when I curl it under a bit. It’s more medium length I suppose. I’m feeling like cutting it chin length though. I really want to get my hair done but I hate sitting for hours having someone work on my hair. I don’t do that, haven’t since I had children. Waste of time. Oh well. Maybe I’ll try curling my hair over the weekend and see how that goes. I guess that’s a mini goal to work with. Makes me feel better now - a bit.
Ok, on to the story - well, once I look at my Country Living mag.
Yes, I admit I’m crazy - I didn’t do anything but browse catalogues online and my magazine and now it’s time to get ready to book for the weekend!
As everyone’s going off for the weekend saying their farewells and/or making plans to meet up later I wonder why it is that I’m not like them. I’ve no desire to hang out with the people I work with. I’ve no true desire to hang out at all really.
I know I’m a true introvert at heart but once upon a time I did socialize with my co-workers. Of course I was young and single and eager for fun then and they were all men since I was in the Navy - suppose that made a big difference. Men for friends are so much better than women. Now I don’t even want to hang out with my male buddies. Friendship seems to be a harder thing to accomplish with men once they’re older. Wonder why? But then again perhaps since I’m much older now socialization just isn’t really what I want or need.
I see keeping company with my co-workers is frivolous and time consuming. I don’t want to talk about kids, clothes, shoes, purses, jewelry and hairstyles. I don’t want to gossip about other co-workers nor do I want to make fun of other co-workers. It isn’t in me. Never much was.
I’m not girly like that though I have been told that I’m very feminine. That would probably be because I’m small and I’m soft spoken. You know the kind of soft voice that people don’t quite hear or simply assume that I’m weak and easy to get over.
Wrong. I’m hard. Probably too hard, hardened by listening to too many people’s sob stories and lies. And I’m tired of listening to their baloney. I don’t want to hear gossip about anyone or anything which is why I never watch shows like Entertainment Tonight UNLESS I want news about a certain movie or sometimes a certain star which is rare.
I suppose it is my hardness that keeps me now secluded in my little cubicle, sneaking around the least traveled hallways in order to avoid the Engineer who likes me too much and all the overly friendly and sometimes dear people that, well, I just don’t want to be bothered with. I sound like a monster don’t I?
~ * ~
It’s quiet now as the cleaners are not here yet and the bosses are, hopefully, preparing to go. I leave a half hour later. I enjoy my hours. Part time, paid well, writing stories, surfing what I can of the Internet and avoiding people. I’ve no regrets that my co-workers will meet over the weekend and laugh and drink and have fun making memories they’ll treasure or either use as fodder for gossip. It’s what they need. Everyone’s different. I’ve finally realized at my age that I don’t need a gaggle of friends. What I need is peace. I finally have it too.
Well, in a minute.
I’m so torn about cutting my hair. What to do? I haven’t worn it long in a few years and then I used to curl it so it was cute but time consuming. Finally I just started hacking it off inch by inch just experimenting with different styles. I loved Lindsay’s hair on One Life to Live prior to her growing it out so I ended up wearing my hair like that for over a year I think. Now as it’s getting longer and just hanging I’m not liking it.
I so want to cut it! Yet since I’ve been running I’m longing to tie my hair back into a ponytail for the convenience. I’m trying to hang tough and go through the summer without cutting it. My youngest thinks I look nicer with it longer and so does her best friend but short hair is so much easier.
Now my hair isn’t down to my waist; just to my shoulders when I curl it under a bit. It’s more medium length I suppose. I’m feeling like cutting it chin length though. I really want to get my hair done but I hate sitting for hours having someone work on my hair. I don’t do that, haven’t since I had children. Waste of time. Oh well. Maybe I’ll try curling my hair over the weekend and see how that goes. I guess that’s a mini goal to work with. Makes me feel better now - a bit.
Ok, on to the story - well, once I look at my Country Living mag.
Yes, I admit I’m crazy - I didn’t do anything but browse catalogues online and my magazine and now it’s time to get ready to book for the weekend!
As everyone’s going off for the weekend saying their farewells and/or making plans to meet up later I wonder why it is that I’m not like them. I’ve no desire to hang out with the people I work with. I’ve no true desire to hang out at all really.
I know I’m a true introvert at heart but once upon a time I did socialize with my co-workers. Of course I was young and single and eager for fun then and they were all men since I was in the Navy - suppose that made a big difference. Men for friends are so much better than women. Now I don’t even want to hang out with my male buddies. Friendship seems to be a harder thing to accomplish with men once they’re older. Wonder why? But then again perhaps since I’m much older now socialization just isn’t really what I want or need.
I see keeping company with my co-workers is frivolous and time consuming. I don’t want to talk about kids, clothes, shoes, purses, jewelry and hairstyles. I don’t want to gossip about other co-workers nor do I want to make fun of other co-workers. It isn’t in me. Never much was.
I’m not girly like that though I have been told that I’m very feminine. That would probably be because I’m small and I’m soft spoken. You know the kind of soft voice that people don’t quite hear or simply assume that I’m weak and easy to get over.
Wrong. I’m hard. Probably too hard, hardened by listening to too many people’s sob stories and lies. And I’m tired of listening to their baloney. I don’t want to hear gossip about anyone or anything which is why I never watch shows like Entertainment Tonight UNLESS I want news about a certain movie or sometimes a certain star which is rare.
I suppose it is my hardness that keeps me now secluded in my little cubicle, sneaking around the least traveled hallways in order to avoid the Engineer who likes me too much and all the overly friendly and sometimes dear people that, well, I just don’t want to be bothered with. I sound like a monster don’t I?
~ * ~
It’s quiet now as the cleaners are not here yet and the bosses are, hopefully, preparing to go. I leave a half hour later. I enjoy my hours. Part time, paid well, writing stories, surfing what I can of the Internet and avoiding people. I’ve no regrets that my co-workers will meet over the weekend and laugh and drink and have fun making memories they’ll treasure or either use as fodder for gossip. It’s what they need. Everyone’s different. I’ve finally realized at my age that I don’t need a gaggle of friends. What I need is peace. I finally have it too.