[GBtR] Chapter 14
Title: Getting Back to Real
Chapter: (14/25+Epilogue) Making Sense
Pairings: YooMin, HoSuJae
Rating: PG-13 for now
Genre: AU, sci-fi, drama
Summary: After the events in Dreaming Back to This, the five have fled Korea and started to rebuild a new life for themselves far away. The past still haunts them, however, perhaps even more than they first realized.
Notes: Action. Next chap. Promise. XD Some very important things that had to be done in this chap, first, though. ^^
Previous: Dreaming Back to This, Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Interlude, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13
Chapter 14: Making Sense
Jaejoong enters the bedroom just as Yoochun starts to wake from the dream. Yoochun had taken to sleeping in Changmin's room since Changmin left, an obvious sign how much he misses the boy, and Jaejoong almost beats himself for letting his anger blind him to Yoochun's pain. He should be supporting his best friend, helping him, not tearing Yoochun down anytime he's reminded that Changmin's gone.
The realization hits him hard just behind the ribs, and he slumps into Min's computer chair just as Yoochun looks up and meets his eyes. "I am an awful best friend," Jaejoong states. It's not exactly how he'd planned on starting the conversation, but he can't just brush off the epiphany he's just had. "Oh my god, why don't you hate me yet?"
Yoochun blinks then sits up in the bed. Jaejoong's tone is calm, but his words are not. Yoochun suspects a heavy dose of shocked comprehension. "You are not an awful best friend," Yoochun corrects him, deep voice still scratchy with sleep. "You've just had some temper-management issues lately, and I've been an easy punching bag."
Cringing at the facts laid bare like that, Jaejoong stares down at his hands. Yoochun shakes his head, knowing Jaejoong has taken his words the wrong way, and reaches over to twine their hands together. "It's okay, Jae. That's what best friends are for. We help each other. Sometimes that means talking and giving advice; other times, it just means being an outlet."
Jaejoong raises his head then, Yoochun offers him a reassuring smile. "You sure you don't mind?" he asks, still hesitant. It's not a side of Jaejoong many people get to see, and every time Yoochun does, he hopes it's the last.
"Of course I don't mind, " Yoochun replies, as if it should be obvious. "Remember when my dreams with Min first started? I was so confused about all of it, and frustrated because I was confused, that I was constantly either snapping at you or ignoring you. Did you ever hold any of that against me?"
Shaking his head, Jaejoong finally offers a tiny smile as he recalls those times. "No. It was really aggravating, and it bugged me that for once I couldn't really understand what you were going through. I knew you were upset, though, so I just couldn't take any of it personally."
"Exactly," Yoochun agrees. "I know you're angry right now, but I also know you're not actually angry at me. Or even at Min, really, if you let yourself think about it. Sometimes it's hard to figure out what to do with all the frustration other than just lash out, though."
Jaejoong nods, acknowledging the truth in Yoochun's observations. Then, as if flipping a switch, he scowls. "Damn you," he grumbles, "and your psych-major, reasonable, logical babble. I try to be upset and guilty and emotional, and you're over there being all common-sensical."
Shrugging, Yoochun flashes him a wide grin. "Well, one of us has to, really," he retorts, "and since we should never expect any kind of common sense or logic from you, I have to have enough for the both of us." He laughs when Jaejoong reaches over to smack his arm.
"Why are we friends?" Jaejoong mutters, trying to suppress his own smile. "You're so mean to me all the time. I shouldn't even like you, let alone call you my best friend."
Rolling his eyes, Yoochun scoffs at the statement. "Don't act like you don't like it. It gives you an excuse to indulge your violent and/or childish tendencies." Jaejoong sticks his tongue out, and Yoochun accepts the proof to justify his point.
They fall into silence, comfortable as it can only be between two people who know each other so well. Jaejoong's fidgeting slowly increases, though, and Yoochun knows there's still more on his mind. "What's up, Jae?"
Jaejoong shifts again in his seat then looks at Yoochun through his eyelashes, a sign of his hesitation. "Well, it's just... how are you taking all of this so calmly? I'm obviously a mess. Yunho and Junsu both have had some over-protective-parent freak-out moments. You should be just as bad, if not worse, but it seems like you're not having any issues at all."
Sobering at the question, Yoochun carefully considers his answer. "It's not... I'm not as held-together as I may look. I fight with it every day, really. Sometimes I get so angry with him because it seems like I keep giving but he's just getting further away. That's not fair to him, though, and I realize that. He needs to do this, and I need to let him. Doesn't mean I don't cry myself to sleep sometimes."
Jaejoong, looking almost apologetic for even asking, crawls onto the bed and gathers Yoochun into a tight hug. Yoochun relaxes into the familiar comfort, wrapping his own arms around Jaejoong's waist. "I love you, Chunnie," Jaejoong says softly, "and Changmin is so lucky to have you."
~*~~*~
Changmin flips through his file folder of notes, scanning through all of the information again to be sure he hasn't missed anything that could throw a wrench in his plans. He's read through the same things so many times he practically has it all memorized, but he can't seem to keep himself from rechecking again and again.
He knows all the ins and outs, has his plan mostly complete. It's the final step, though. He has the end in sight finally, and he can't allow a simple oversight to screw up all of his work to this point. He won't. There's far too much on the line now. So he checks once more, just to reassure himself.
Pulling out his map of the Centre, extensive and detailed and drawn mostly by memory, Changmin stares at the little purple star in the middle. He'll be passing through the dorms on his way to the medical wing anyway, so it won't hurt anything to make that one small detour. "Take care of her," Kangdae had asked him, and Changmin has every intention of fulfilling that promise now that he's in a position to do so.
He can't take her with him right away, of course - not to his confrontation with Phillips, not when she's so young still - but he can at least check on her, make sure she's okay. Promise to come back for her once he gets rid of the doctor. Hopefully by then he'll have already taken care of all of Phillips's cronies, too. That's the plan, at least.
Changmin had almost been surprised by how shallowly Phillips had distributed his power. Beyond about a dozen men hand-picked by Phillips to oversee things when he couldn't, the majority of Centre employees seemed to only keep up the appearance of loyalty to him, mostly out of fear. Then Changmin realized it actually makes total sense. Phillips has an almost obsessive need to control everything. If he delegated too much to others, he would have to share that control.
It works out in Changmin's favor, though, thankfully. The fewer people Phillips has granted any of that power to, the fewer Changmin has to take out before things at the Centre start to fall apart. If nothing else, Changmin can be grateful to the man for that much.
~*~~*~
Yoochun scowls as he stumbles back and sinks down onto the couch again. He's not hitting the floor with every attack anymore at least, but they're still affecting him. It's not nearly enough progress, not quickly enough, especially since he knows Hyunae is pulling her punches. And all she keeps telling him is to "tap into" his core. If he knew how to do that, he gripes to himself, this wouldn't still be a problem.
He hadn't been expecting miracles after his talk with Changmin. Well, okay, maybe he had. Maybe he'd built up unrealistic expectations based just on receiving Changmin's advice, and these tiniest of baby steps forward were just that much more frustrating because of it. Even Jaejoong and Hyunae haven't been able to fully hide their disappointment.
Taking a deep breath, Yoochun closes his eyes and tries to tamp down his annoyance since Changmin had specifically told him that getting emotional would make it more difficult. He's always been an emotional person, though, so controlling that is so much easier said than done. He focuses on his breathing, but when he doesn't stir beyond those deep breaths for another minute, Jaejoong finally asks, "Chunnie? Are you okay?"
He doesn't answer at first, drawing one more deep breath before opening his eyes. Something had clicked into place in that last moment, and he hopes it's as important as it feels. "Yeah, I'm fine," he tells Jaejoong. "Just needed a minute. Let's try this again."
"Are you sure?" Hyunae asks, concerned about how long it had taken him to come back from that hit.
Yoochun just nods as he stands up again, centering himself over his feet to brace for another practice. "I'm sure," he replies with absolute certainty. "I was just getting frustrated with myself and needed a chance to calm down. I'm ready now, promise."
She decides to take his word for it even as Jaejoong is still shooting him worried glances. Settling herself back into her own position, she throws another wave of power at him. That breath he just took must have done some good, though, because he doesn't even flinch this time. She ups the intensity of her attack; he still stands strong, so she continues to slowly increase the power.
Yoochun feels the battering of Hyunae's strike against his mind, but unlike previous attempts, it never moves beyond that general awareness. Even as she pushes harder, whatever defenses he'd found hold strong. After a minute, he even starts pushing back. They go back and forth for another minute, feinting touches to test each other. When she gives a particularly forceful surge, he returns the favor.
That final piece sliding into place must have done more for him than he'd anticipated, though. Hyunae's defenses crack and splinter in the onslaught. Then he's suddenly through and in. She falls to the floor, unconscious, as Yoochun pushes her into a dream state.
And it all suddenly makes sense to him, every facet of his power suddenly apparent. He could keep her there, Yoochun realizes, keep her unconscious and trapped in whatever dream - or nightmare - he constructs for her for as long as he wants to. The realization shakes him, and he slips back out of her mind again. She starts to wake as soon as he's gone.
When her eyes open, Jaejoong helps her off the floor and to the couch. "What in the world was that?" he questions frantically, eyes darting back and forth between the two. He'd been plenty impressed when Yoochun had managed to stay standing this time. As the confrontation had dragged on, though, he'd grown increasingly anxious. When Hyunae had then passed out instead of Yoochun, Jaejoong may have stopped breathing for a bit.
"That," Hyunae replies, eyes almost glued to Yoochun, "was way beyond even my highest expectations." Yoochun blushes, eyes still wide with the shock of what he's just done, and she continues, "I was thinking maybe some light subconscious control or something whenever you did finally figure it all out, but that... You actually put me to sleep, didn't you? You put me straight in to REM and built a dream around me. And you could have left me there, too, if you'd chosen."
Jaejoong finally stops fussing over her to whirl around and lock eyes with Yoochun, the question of whether Hyunae's words were true clear in his gaze. Yoochun can only nod slowly in response. "I... Yeah, I think so. At least, something inside me was telling me I could."
Hyunae grins through the exhaustion still lingering over her. "That's just... That's amazing. Seriously. I never even imagined something like that," she states, awe and glee both evident in her voice. "You, Chunnie, may have just become our new secret weapon. No one will ever see this one coming."
Chapter: (14/25+Epilogue) Making Sense
Pairings: YooMin, HoSuJae
Rating: PG-13 for now
Genre: AU, sci-fi, drama
Summary: After the events in Dreaming Back to This, the five have fled Korea and started to rebuild a new life for themselves far away. The past still haunts them, however, perhaps even more than they first realized.
Notes: Action. Next chap. Promise. XD Some very important things that had to be done in this chap, first, though. ^^
Previous: Dreaming Back to This, Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Interlude, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13
Chapter 14: Making Sense
Jaejoong enters the bedroom just as Yoochun starts to wake from the dream. Yoochun had taken to sleeping in Changmin's room since Changmin left, an obvious sign how much he misses the boy, and Jaejoong almost beats himself for letting his anger blind him to Yoochun's pain. He should be supporting his best friend, helping him, not tearing Yoochun down anytime he's reminded that Changmin's gone.
The realization hits him hard just behind the ribs, and he slumps into Min's computer chair just as Yoochun looks up and meets his eyes. "I am an awful best friend," Jaejoong states. It's not exactly how he'd planned on starting the conversation, but he can't just brush off the epiphany he's just had. "Oh my god, why don't you hate me yet?"
Yoochun blinks then sits up in the bed. Jaejoong's tone is calm, but his words are not. Yoochun suspects a heavy dose of shocked comprehension. "You are not an awful best friend," Yoochun corrects him, deep voice still scratchy with sleep. "You've just had some temper-management issues lately, and I've been an easy punching bag."
Cringing at the facts laid bare like that, Jaejoong stares down at his hands. Yoochun shakes his head, knowing Jaejoong has taken his words the wrong way, and reaches over to twine their hands together. "It's okay, Jae. That's what best friends are for. We help each other. Sometimes that means talking and giving advice; other times, it just means being an outlet."
Jaejoong raises his head then, Yoochun offers him a reassuring smile. "You sure you don't mind?" he asks, still hesitant. It's not a side of Jaejoong many people get to see, and every time Yoochun does, he hopes it's the last.
"Of course I don't mind, " Yoochun replies, as if it should be obvious. "Remember when my dreams with Min first started? I was so confused about all of it, and frustrated because I was confused, that I was constantly either snapping at you or ignoring you. Did you ever hold any of that against me?"
Shaking his head, Jaejoong finally offers a tiny smile as he recalls those times. "No. It was really aggravating, and it bugged me that for once I couldn't really understand what you were going through. I knew you were upset, though, so I just couldn't take any of it personally."
"Exactly," Yoochun agrees. "I know you're angry right now, but I also know you're not actually angry at me. Or even at Min, really, if you let yourself think about it. Sometimes it's hard to figure out what to do with all the frustration other than just lash out, though."
Jaejoong nods, acknowledging the truth in Yoochun's observations. Then, as if flipping a switch, he scowls. "Damn you," he grumbles, "and your psych-major, reasonable, logical babble. I try to be upset and guilty and emotional, and you're over there being all common-sensical."
Shrugging, Yoochun flashes him a wide grin. "Well, one of us has to, really," he retorts, "and since we should never expect any kind of common sense or logic from you, I have to have enough for the both of us." He laughs when Jaejoong reaches over to smack his arm.
"Why are we friends?" Jaejoong mutters, trying to suppress his own smile. "You're so mean to me all the time. I shouldn't even like you, let alone call you my best friend."
Rolling his eyes, Yoochun scoffs at the statement. "Don't act like you don't like it. It gives you an excuse to indulge your violent and/or childish tendencies." Jaejoong sticks his tongue out, and Yoochun accepts the proof to justify his point.
They fall into silence, comfortable as it can only be between two people who know each other so well. Jaejoong's fidgeting slowly increases, though, and Yoochun knows there's still more on his mind. "What's up, Jae?"
Jaejoong shifts again in his seat then looks at Yoochun through his eyelashes, a sign of his hesitation. "Well, it's just... how are you taking all of this so calmly? I'm obviously a mess. Yunho and Junsu both have had some over-protective-parent freak-out moments. You should be just as bad, if not worse, but it seems like you're not having any issues at all."
Sobering at the question, Yoochun carefully considers his answer. "It's not... I'm not as held-together as I may look. I fight with it every day, really. Sometimes I get so angry with him because it seems like I keep giving but he's just getting further away. That's not fair to him, though, and I realize that. He needs to do this, and I need to let him. Doesn't mean I don't cry myself to sleep sometimes."
Jaejoong, looking almost apologetic for even asking, crawls onto the bed and gathers Yoochun into a tight hug. Yoochun relaxes into the familiar comfort, wrapping his own arms around Jaejoong's waist. "I love you, Chunnie," Jaejoong says softly, "and Changmin is so lucky to have you."
~*~~*~
Changmin flips through his file folder of notes, scanning through all of the information again to be sure he hasn't missed anything that could throw a wrench in his plans. He's read through the same things so many times he practically has it all memorized, but he can't seem to keep himself from rechecking again and again.
He knows all the ins and outs, has his plan mostly complete. It's the final step, though. He has the end in sight finally, and he can't allow a simple oversight to screw up all of his work to this point. He won't. There's far too much on the line now. So he checks once more, just to reassure himself.
Pulling out his map of the Centre, extensive and detailed and drawn mostly by memory, Changmin stares at the little purple star in the middle. He'll be passing through the dorms on his way to the medical wing anyway, so it won't hurt anything to make that one small detour. "Take care of her," Kangdae had asked him, and Changmin has every intention of fulfilling that promise now that he's in a position to do so.
He can't take her with him right away, of course - not to his confrontation with Phillips, not when she's so young still - but he can at least check on her, make sure she's okay. Promise to come back for her once he gets rid of the doctor. Hopefully by then he'll have already taken care of all of Phillips's cronies, too. That's the plan, at least.
Changmin had almost been surprised by how shallowly Phillips had distributed his power. Beyond about a dozen men hand-picked by Phillips to oversee things when he couldn't, the majority of Centre employees seemed to only keep up the appearance of loyalty to him, mostly out of fear. Then Changmin realized it actually makes total sense. Phillips has an almost obsessive need to control everything. If he delegated too much to others, he would have to share that control.
It works out in Changmin's favor, though, thankfully. The fewer people Phillips has granted any of that power to, the fewer Changmin has to take out before things at the Centre start to fall apart. If nothing else, Changmin can be grateful to the man for that much.
~*~~*~
Yoochun scowls as he stumbles back and sinks down onto the couch again. He's not hitting the floor with every attack anymore at least, but they're still affecting him. It's not nearly enough progress, not quickly enough, especially since he knows Hyunae is pulling her punches. And all she keeps telling him is to "tap into" his core. If he knew how to do that, he gripes to himself, this wouldn't still be a problem.
He hadn't been expecting miracles after his talk with Changmin. Well, okay, maybe he had. Maybe he'd built up unrealistic expectations based just on receiving Changmin's advice, and these tiniest of baby steps forward were just that much more frustrating because of it. Even Jaejoong and Hyunae haven't been able to fully hide their disappointment.
Taking a deep breath, Yoochun closes his eyes and tries to tamp down his annoyance since Changmin had specifically told him that getting emotional would make it more difficult. He's always been an emotional person, though, so controlling that is so much easier said than done. He focuses on his breathing, but when he doesn't stir beyond those deep breaths for another minute, Jaejoong finally asks, "Chunnie? Are you okay?"
He doesn't answer at first, drawing one more deep breath before opening his eyes. Something had clicked into place in that last moment, and he hopes it's as important as it feels. "Yeah, I'm fine," he tells Jaejoong. "Just needed a minute. Let's try this again."
"Are you sure?" Hyunae asks, concerned about how long it had taken him to come back from that hit.
Yoochun just nods as he stands up again, centering himself over his feet to brace for another practice. "I'm sure," he replies with absolute certainty. "I was just getting frustrated with myself and needed a chance to calm down. I'm ready now, promise."
She decides to take his word for it even as Jaejoong is still shooting him worried glances. Settling herself back into her own position, she throws another wave of power at him. That breath he just took must have done some good, though, because he doesn't even flinch this time. She ups the intensity of her attack; he still stands strong, so she continues to slowly increase the power.
Yoochun feels the battering of Hyunae's strike against his mind, but unlike previous attempts, it never moves beyond that general awareness. Even as she pushes harder, whatever defenses he'd found hold strong. After a minute, he even starts pushing back. They go back and forth for another minute, feinting touches to test each other. When she gives a particularly forceful surge, he returns the favor.
That final piece sliding into place must have done more for him than he'd anticipated, though. Hyunae's defenses crack and splinter in the onslaught. Then he's suddenly through and in. She falls to the floor, unconscious, as Yoochun pushes her into a dream state.
And it all suddenly makes sense to him, every facet of his power suddenly apparent. He could keep her there, Yoochun realizes, keep her unconscious and trapped in whatever dream - or nightmare - he constructs for her for as long as he wants to. The realization shakes him, and he slips back out of her mind again. She starts to wake as soon as he's gone.
When her eyes open, Jaejoong helps her off the floor and to the couch. "What in the world was that?" he questions frantically, eyes darting back and forth between the two. He'd been plenty impressed when Yoochun had managed to stay standing this time. As the confrontation had dragged on, though, he'd grown increasingly anxious. When Hyunae had then passed out instead of Yoochun, Jaejoong may have stopped breathing for a bit.
"That," Hyunae replies, eyes almost glued to Yoochun, "was way beyond even my highest expectations." Yoochun blushes, eyes still wide with the shock of what he's just done, and she continues, "I was thinking maybe some light subconscious control or something whenever you did finally figure it all out, but that... You actually put me to sleep, didn't you? You put me straight in to REM and built a dream around me. And you could have left me there, too, if you'd chosen."
Jaejoong finally stops fussing over her to whirl around and lock eyes with Yoochun, the question of whether Hyunae's words were true clear in his gaze. Yoochun can only nod slowly in response. "I... Yeah, I think so. At least, something inside me was telling me I could."
Hyunae grins through the exhaustion still lingering over her. "That's just... That's amazing. Seriously. I never even imagined something like that," she states, awe and glee both evident in her voice. "You, Chunnie, may have just become our new secret weapon. No one will ever see this one coming."