Mar 08, 2006 13:17
I think I'm the most perverse person in the world sometimes. I don't even mean to be, really, but sometimes things just happen. Like, for example, last week the doctors mentioned sort of off-handedly that if I get sick right before my surgery it might have to be post-poned. Something about putting me under while being sick being a bad combination or something. I kind of shrugged it off. Whatever. Course, because it's me, I started feeling the symptoms a few days later, and I've been pretty under the weather since Sunday. I think I'm getting better; I've been stuffing myself to the gills with water, tea, juice, etc. At least, I hope I'll be better enough by Friday when my actual surgery is. I'd hatehatehatehate to have to postpone it. Might as well get it all over with in one fell swoop at the beginning of break so I'm not feeling so miserable by the time classes start again.
What with being sick and having two midterms on Monday and having to lead a 3 hour class on Thursday, this week hasn't been the greatest. And why, I'd like to know, were both of my midterms on Monday cursed with a stream of constant interruptions? We picked up random radio frequency during the first, filling the classroom with parts of the radio show interspersed with obnoxiously loud periods of static. Then, in my second, the construction in Greenlaw was quite literally shaking our room. And that one, I might add, was a 50 minute exam in which we had to do 10 short answer questions and 2 essays. Sometimes I think professors don't realize that when they make midterm exams, WE ONLY HAVE 50 MINUTES TO COMPLETE THEM, NOT 3 HOURS. Or, possibly, my professor's just evil and sadistic. And he seemed like such a nice old man too.
If you'd have asked me at the beginning of the semester how I imagined this semester would go, and the summer, and next fall, I can guarantee that nothing that has happened would be on my list. No fun spring break adventures: I'll be spending most of my time in Davis library, doing research for papers which will take over my life for the second half of the semester. No rugby. No living on campus next year; in the process of searching for an apartment. Not that that's a bad thing, just new, and different, and a little scary because it's not something I ever considered doing until senior year. But we might get a kitten, which would totally make it worthwhile. Or kittens. Not sure what I'll be doing over the summer. Was supposed to work with Claire at the barn for a month and a half and then jet off to New Zealand. Now I don't know what to do. Have signed up for UNC's career services program, hoping to make an appointment with an advisor for directly after spring break, and will be searching for possible internships in the meantime, but it may be too late. And that's a terrifying thought....not that it would be impossible to set one up for next summer or anything, but if I'm not doing that this summer, what will I be doing??? Plus, along with figuring out summer and apartments and papers and everything else, I'll be doing serious re-hab for the rest of the semester.
I try not to get too glass-half-empty all the time, but HONESTLY...as I was telling Erin last night, sometimes I feel like I should just write this semester off as a Lori-fails-at-life adventure. And that's really sad, because I only have so much time at college and I love it here so I should be enjoying it to the utmost, but it's kinda hard at the moment.
Don't have much to say about the so-called "terrorist attack" on campus. I don't really consider it terrorism. I consider it some stupid kid making a stupid decision that has now fucked up his life forever. Can't blame anyone but himself though...if he's so angry about how Muslims are treated around the world, why not go after the people that are to blame? Why drive a car through one of the most liberal college campuses in the entire south and try to hurt people you used to go to school with? Boggles the mind, really does.
This isn't all completely depressing. We beat Dook at home last weekend, ruined senior night for JJ, and have now finished 2nd in the ACC. Seems almost miraculous, really, except that it's really about hard work and good coaching and good players and being Carolina basketball. I truly loved watching the game...went with Erin and Josh and Will in one of the north campus dorms, ate some food, screamed my bloody lungs out, jumped up and down on my good leg when things got exciting. Soon as we won people spilled out of the dorms and started screaming like banshees, streaming towards Franklin St. We went at a slightly more sedate pace but still made it in time for the big bonfires, chanting, crowd surfing, etc. Best part was 2 guys walking in the opposite direction who saw me and called out "Now there's dedication!" Rioting on Franklin with a bum knee and a giant brace is not quite glorious, but it certainly added to the surreal sense of things. Wouldn't have done it any other way, even if inhaling bonfire smoke advanced my illness considerably.
It's sunny and decently warm today (and by decent I mean 60's, in early March...how my categories for weather have changed). Supposed to be getting up to the 80's this weekend, with even more sun. Plan on going outside and baking myself in the sun. Maybe if I get a nice tan it'll sort of hide the hot scar I'll be picking up on Friday.
Now I go to class, I go to work, I go to orchestra, and I finish preparing for my excursion as class leader on Thursday.