Gotta Be Somebody's Blues
I need a picture, I need to add everyone, I need to sleep, I need to figure out why I do the things I do, I need to embrace my absolute discomfort with the world, I need to keep thinking about the things that I need.
Negative thoughts are all that run through my head lately, I don't know whats wrong with me but thats the problem is that I'm just finally feeling like everyone else.
Imperfect
weak
afraid
confused
lonely.
I think I really need this LiveJournal now unlike before, so hopefully this time around I really keep it up.
I'm very awake right now, although I'm mentally exhausted, and I have 8 am class everyday this quarter, WHAT WAS I THINKING?! so my bed is looking at me with that mother tsk tsk look and I'm wondering how my bed can have such detailed facial expressions. I'm playing the new Groove Armada and Jimmy Eat World CD's from my iHome and getting angry with the computer screen for captivating me for hours once again.
I came to a conclusion today, I'm not DOING anything with my life. Its just one distraction from another distraction after another distraction, my whole LIFE is a distraction. Hence my name. I would rather dream than live, my dreams are more imaginative and creative than my conscious psyche could ever possibly be.
Which leads to another conclusion: Drugs = COMPLETE BAD NEWS for me
Sleep, Sex, Music, and Alcohol will have to do, along with all my other not so conventional distractions, for the rest of my life.
I could probably go on for a long time tonight but I really need to sleep now, I kinda need to function tomorrow,
Music Theory, Musicianship, Concert Choir, Chamber Singers, and Musical Theatre Class
sounds like a dream come true
but the truth is, I can't enjoy anything anymore
because all I do
is miss everyone, and everything
I never thought life after high school could get this
Lonely
~Liss!