Hodge Podge of Thoughts
So it's the new year and of course being the glutton for punishment, my mind drifts back to NYEs of the past. Thinking of my favorite parties and remembering all the people I've lost over the years. And the few I've gained. This year's NYE ended up pretty lame. Pete canceled out on going to the Heartland and I ended up at a small party at Cory's which ended by ten. I ended up driving home and continuing my Cusack movie marathon. Well this afternoon I was trying to remember what I did for NYE when I was 21 and I couldn't. So I turned to my trusty lj. On the app. So to get to the right date, I had to scroll back through ALL of the previous entries. So many memories. So many stupid things I've done. So many relationships sabotaged by my issues. I wish I could just delete this thing at times but it holds way too many memories. But talk about a kick to the face. It really makes me wonder why people are friends with me. Wow.
Enough about the past. I understand people use the internet to vent and voice their opinions. I mean, that was the reason I first got an lj. A blog is one thing but I have seen so many people just oversharing and being just so aggravating on facebook that I just want to hit them. If every post is FML and about how horrible things are, you need to go get help. Occasionally posting things, fine but there's a line. My life has been far from perfect but you don't see me splattering it ALL over facebook constantly. Grow up and post that shit in a blog or start keeping a journal. Please.
Do you ever feel like you are being forgotten or overlooked when you are being the "good" child? So my oldest brother is worthless. Lives with mom yet never spends time with her. You'd never know he was alive some days. And now he's all wrapped up in yet another new girlfriend so we all fall to wayside. Dan has completely cut off the rest of the family from his life. I haven't seen my nephew since June. My mother is constantly broken up over it and always complaining about it. Sure, make me feel like shit for caring and trying. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
So I've pretty much decided to just give up on the whole dating thing. Obviously I still have issues built up from the past and probably should pretend to be able to work those out. Besides my luck with guys seems to be horrendous. During my time in Milwaukee I managed to pick up a new stalker and online dating is still as much of an epic fail as ever. And if one more ex boyfriend appears from the woodwork and causes me mind games, I'm going to scream.
Alright. Enough bitching for now. Bedtime for me.
Enough about the past. I understand people use the internet to vent and voice their opinions. I mean, that was the reason I first got an lj. A blog is one thing but I have seen so many people just oversharing and being just so aggravating on facebook that I just want to hit them. If every post is FML and about how horrible things are, you need to go get help. Occasionally posting things, fine but there's a line. My life has been far from perfect but you don't see me splattering it ALL over facebook constantly. Grow up and post that shit in a blog or start keeping a journal. Please.
Do you ever feel like you are being forgotten or overlooked when you are being the "good" child? So my oldest brother is worthless. Lives with mom yet never spends time with her. You'd never know he was alive some days. And now he's all wrapped up in yet another new girlfriend so we all fall to wayside. Dan has completely cut off the rest of the family from his life. I haven't seen my nephew since June. My mother is constantly broken up over it and always complaining about it. Sure, make me feel like shit for caring and trying. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
So I've pretty much decided to just give up on the whole dating thing. Obviously I still have issues built up from the past and probably should pretend to be able to work those out. Besides my luck with guys seems to be horrendous. During my time in Milwaukee I managed to pick up a new stalker and online dating is still as much of an epic fail as ever. And if one more ex boyfriend appears from the woodwork and causes me mind games, I'm going to scream.
Alright. Enough bitching for now. Bedtime for me.