Fic Preview- Marcus/Kyle
Title: Destiny Has a Way
Fandom: Crossover Terminator Salvation/Star Trek 2009
Pairings: Marcus/Kyle, Pavel/Sam, past Sulu/Pavel
Rating: T
Warnings: slight angst in the beginning.
Author's note: I have already forgotten where the idea for this fic came from but that's not important. What is important is that it is giving me a lot more trouble than I originally suspected it would. Also, the idea is so completely off the chain that I don't now if anyone will even like it. So, I'm posting the beginning of what I have. If anyone actually likes this, comment and I will finish it.
Working Summary: Kyle said goodbye to Marcus in a field tent in the middle of a war. Some thousand years later, Pavel Chekov saves Sam Worth during a fight and destiny has a way of working itself out.
Destiny Has a Way
Life is measured in heartbeats.
It’s one of the first things Kyle ever learned: life is measured in heartbeats. As long as it kept beating, you were alive. It was just about the only way to remember you’re alive at all sometimes, in a world like this.
Life is measured in heartbeats.
Kyle holds on to this knowledge as long as he can once Marcus volunteers his heart, his expression resolute and determined. He repeats it to himself as much as possible in the space of those few seconds before Marcus looks at him and then it falls apart beneath the weight of his gaze, beneath the apologies and goodbyes his eyes are trying to tell him. Then things go blurry around the edges with tears but he still can’t look away from Marcus’ eyes, until the blue irises the only thing in focus anymore. He’s looking for something there he thinks, maybe, but he’s not sure for what. Whatever it is, Marcus looks away before he can find it, turning back towards Kate and it’s all over before Kyle truly has a chance to process anything at all really. Before he has a chance to say goodbye himself.
This should take longer, Kyle thinks, this trading of a life, of a heart. It should be slow, every moment in stark and painful relief, as if the worlds going to end again because of this one moment. It feels like it will to Kyle, who’s come to rely on Marcus in barely a week, because the man has become his whole world, and he thinks everyone else should understand just how big this sacrifice is. But they don’t and it’s not; it’s quick and sudden and when it’s over, it’s almost joyful for everyone but the three who understand Marcus is, was, more than just a machine. And that hurts too; somehow, it hurts even more than losing Marcus, because no one seems to understand that right now, the hero is Marcus.
Blair turns to them and gathers them in her arms, holding them close like they’re the only real thing she has left, and whispers things Kyle doesn’t pretend to understand, her voice chopped apart with sobs. Star buries her head in the leg of his pants and cries a little too, both for this man they barely knew and were only beginning to understand. Kyle doesn’t, even though the tears are hanging on his eyelashes waiting to fall and his heart feels like it’s nothing but pain anymore, curled tight and burning hot in his chest; he can’t, no matter how much he wants to. He’s not even sure why.
Later they get to the Resistance Base and he and Star are given a room, with Blair thankfully, the most familiar face they have now. He lies in bed that night only to stare up at the ragged ceiling and wait for the tears to come, wants them to come if it will get rid of this pain in his chest. But they don’t and he wonders half- hysterical with loss, regrets, and a thousand words he wishes he could have said if he’s too sad to even cry. He wonders if it really is possible to die from a broken heart, because he’s sure if it is, he will. He’ll be dead by morning because it feels like he can’t live without Marcus any more, doesn’t really want to.
He doesn’t though. No, Kyle Reese lives to 23 only to die by the hand of a T-800 Terminator, one with the same face that in a roundabout way took Marcus away- it’s poetic really, in its own morbid way- in order to save a young, beautiful Sarah Connor in the past. Never once does he ever manage to cry for Marcus and never once does the pain fade the slightest bit. He comes to the conclusion when he’s 19 that crying will make it all too real so he stops trying, no part of him quite ready to let Marcus go no matter how much time passes. During that time, his world never quite manages to piece itself back together again. Connor’s Resistance Base is too close to the front lines for Star to stay there for very long and barely a year after Marcus’ death, she’s gone, moved further south with the rest of the children they’ve managed to find and keep safe during that time. He never does see her again. Blair, sweet, hysterical Blair, who once drunkenly mentioned that he was a cute kid and if Marcus was still alive they would defiantly be having themselves a threesome- it had earned them both vehement glares from Connor for a week after-, died two years later on what she had known was a suicide mission from Connor.
He wishes he could say it was the loneliness that made him start hearing it sometimes, brief and infrequent though it may be, but it’s not because it starts that first week after Marcus dies. There are times, random times during his life, where he swears he can hear Marcus’ heart beating in Connor’s chest. Those are the days he really hates John fucking Connor, not that he ever particularly likes the man.
On his good days, he believes he really does have the worst luck and only blames Connor for a few of the things that have gone wrong in his life. On his bad days, when he’s feeling tired, defeated, and cynical, he knows that deep down, he never did believe Connor deserved Marcus’ heart and even if the entire Resistance fell apart, he’d rather have Marcus by his side than to be stuck following Connor’s orders.
He’d rather have Marcus than a thousand Connors. It’s the thought that rolls through his head as he dies, even if he does also think his last thought should be for Sarah, who has managed to find a place in his heart despite everything, right beside Marcus. He’s rather fond of her really; too bad he hates her son with a passion, even if it turns out that Connor now really is his son as well. So he does wish her luck and hopes that maybe she can bring her son up with a bit more sense this time, a bit more heart. His last thought is still for Marcus, is still to wonder if there’s a heaven and if Marcus is waiting there. He hopes so.
Some Thousand Years Later
Pavel Chekov has always known there’s something just a bit strange about him, something not quite right. His father told him so when he was twelve, his grandmother when he was fourteen and halfway through the Academy already. They both said he had eyes too old for his body, for the sweet, child-like face he’d been given. They always said he’d been a quiet child, too quiet, and too serious for his own good some times. They said it felt like he’d been born already an adult and that he was just waiting for his body to catch up. He feels like that a lot himself too, like he’s older than should be possible, with more scars and secrets and shadows than even he knows about.
But there are other things he does know, things he never needs to be taught because he was born knowing them. It starts when he’s just a little kid, starts with walking, then mathematics and finally turns to encompass every subject taught by the schools near his house, although language doesn’t come as easy as it should at first. He’s goes to the Star Fleet Academy for a challenge, which he gets in some areas but not in others because they come just as easy as everything else always has. Things that come easy tend to be what the beginners struggle with -making the important decisions with barely time to think about it, keeping a calm head when things go wrong, and knowing how to fire a phaser when others are shooting back- and it does nothing but make him stand out. So the things he struggles with become the things he chooses to excel at and he ignores those things that come to him as if they were second nature. It’s not for the challenge like he originally wanted; it’s because when things in his life happen too easily, he gets anxious and can’t help but wait for the other hand to drop.
His mother always said he had a sweet smile and that she loved it when he did so. He never does tell her that he’s afraid, that he’s always afraid. It feels like he was born afraid sometimes, like it’s the response his body’s been programmed with. No matter what he does, he always ends up afraid. But in the end, the fear turns out to be a good thing. It becomes a familiar tightening in his stomach, something that becomes easy to ignore when things get bad. It’s useful during his first trip on the Enterprise, when everything starts happening so fast. Half the crew freezes in terror, unsure what to do under pressure, but not him. He’s used to it by now, knows how to deal with it, and doesn’t freeze, keeps moving, and it saves the lives of two people who will move on to become some of his closest friends when it’s all over when they fall. It’s not enough to save everyone in the end; but even then, he knows that he will never be able to save everyone, that to try would just end up killing him. That knowledge and the surety it carries end up scaring him too.
Kirk asks him a week into his official assignment as the Enterprise’s navigator how he managed not to freeze up. They’re sitting in the mess with Hikaru, Spock, and Uhura and they all turn to look at him when for his answer. He smiles and shrugs, mentions he’s good under pressure, and returns to his meal, dimly aware of the coiled muscles in his shoulders and the anxiety in the pit of his stomach that have been a constant sign of his fear. The conversation moves on then, Pavel occasionally offering his opinion. To this day, he has never told anyone how he’s always afraid.
It’s not just fear, he decides when the phasers start firing on his current mission, breaking through the peaceful atmosphere of the trade talks they’re having. It’s fatalism. He’s always scared something’s going to go wrong and kill them all and for some reason the possibility of it happening seems stronger than it should.
He’s off to the side when it starts, talking to a pleasant young woman with long dark hair and a dark complexion whose laugh is contagious and makes a wave of nostalgia crash through him every time. He doesn’t ask for her name or her for his but he thinks he might have heard it whispered about by others because he has the general feel of it. Something like Blire or Baire maybe. They’re laughing about something he won’t remember once he leaves her presence when the first of the phasers go off and he’s pulling the young woman down for cover with barely a second thought. Across the wide courtyard, Kirk and Spock do so as well and call for back up. Far away from them, Hikaru and Uhura are trying to get as many civilians as they can out of the firing range. Pavel decides he doesn’t like this world very much.
“Keptin!” he shouts over the roar and risks a glance from out of his cover. Both Kirk and Spock are pinned down; however, the number of people firing back is getting progressively less by the second. Civilians are still scattered hopelessly around the area and there is no way Hikaru and Uhura are going to be able to get to them all. “Vhat did you say this time?”
For a moment, no one can answer him as they all move to an area when they can duck and fire at the same time. Kirk turns to him briefly and in the spare seconds before he grins playfully, before his eyes lose their hard edge, Pavel is reminded sharply of another man with sharp blue eyes that always remained cool under pressure; a tough man with a good heart whose name is on the tip of his tongue before the impression disappears completely with Kirk’s cocky grin. “I think this is your entire fault, Chekov. You and that stupid accent.” Kirk shouts at him playfully.
It startles a laugh out of him as he reaches for his own phaser. He barely ever uses it even on missions, rarely has to- he’s the kid of the group and the others protect him rather he wants them to or not- but the minute its weight is in his hand the world turns sharp and clear, every detail jumping out at him. He always feels like a different person when holding a weapon. It’s this awareness that lets him see the man scrambling across the courtyard that has turned into their battlefield. He aims for him then pauses when he notices the man is wearing a Starfleet uniform. The man kneels down just to the side of the battle, covering what looked like a small group of kids. He let out a few curses in Russian before shouting out to the captain again. “Keptin! There are children!”
Kirk doesn’t look at him again, can’t look at him due to the position he’s in, so Pavel turns to the young woman beside him and begs her to stay where she is. Then he runs over as fast as he can to the man, shooting down those that try to get in his way. No one seems to pay him much attention though. Just keep ignoring the kid with the gun. He begs silently as he moves from cover to cover. He’s almost there, can almost reach out and grab the man’s shirt when a stray phaser round flies over the man’s shoulder. He lets out a startled shout, catching one of the shooters’ attention. Pavel doesn’t think before he dives forward and pushes the man to the ground with his body.
He raises the phaser without a second thought and the shot is just about the easiest he’s ever taken. The shooter goes down before he can alert anyone else to their presence on the sidelines. He turns back to the man he’s saved and meets cool blue eyes that strike a chord deep in his heart. The whole world stops as he stares at the man. Some part of Pavel, the part that makes him just a little strange, recognizes the man, recognizes the board forehead and strong jaw, with such an intensity it hurts. His heart feels like it’s going to break in two, a wave of grief and deep relief he can’t explain washing over him. For a single second his lungs freeze and all he can hear is the pounding of his heart.
Marcus.
Then the world comes back, phasers ringing in his ears right beside the cries of scared children. The man is staring at him with wide eyes now like he recognizes Pavel the same way Pavel recognizes him. They don’t have the time for this now though so he tells him, and although he doesn’t spare a thought for the words they feel like the most important thing he’s ever going to say, like they mean something he can’t possibly understand yet, “Come with me if you want to live.”