The Restoration
Diary
Watching the election results from California was painful. So much suspense. So much agony. And then? Ecstasy. Watching the crowds at Grant Park, I decided that I am going to try to be in Washington DC for inauguration day. Anyone got good hotel recommendations?
The best part of the night, for me, was when Obama started telling us what to do. He was calm, inspiring, and a little bit firm. We are to be congratulated. We are to stay positive. We are to be humble. We are to start working together. Implicit in that admonishment was "No Gloating." I sighed with relief. If America has been looking for a new Daddy, I think we got one who will give us some respect, some structure and some responsibilities. It was a nightmare being "parented" by a man we did not respect, an administration that ruled through fear and ridicule, alternating with a hefty dose of neglect, stuffing us with bread and circuses, so that we would ignore our own feelings of impotence and helplessness, and finally giving the silent treatment to those who did speak out.
Since I am a family therapist and am on a roll with this child rearing metaphor, let me warn that now, now comes the testing. Joe Biden was right. He was ridiculed, but he was right. America won't rest, the world won't rest, until we make absolutely sure that the new administration will retain its hopeful, inclusive and disciplined stance towards us and our global siblings, no matter what happens, no matter what people do.
Now, before I get too carried away with my "America as Family" description, I know that *President Obama* (eee! It looks so nice all typed out!) is not perfect. He will lose his cool and he will become, at times, too detached. Perhaps his measured approach to problems will cause us to miss critical opportunities or bungle challenges due to timing. It is most certain that President Obama's desire to find the common ground between opponents and to devise a compromise between them will, at times, leave everyone dissatisfied at some point. We will be disappointed when the President fails to live up to our expectations, when the problems that have taken years to ripen take years to die. When the very nature of expedient politics is to gamble with the rights of the individual in order to bring about the public good, our new President may be tempted and sometimes fall. The world will soon get impatient with us, having seen that America is full of potential, but we that we remain teenagers- with all the narcissistic idealism and self righteous aggression that goes with adolescence.
But the strength of a family is shown during the repairitive phase of a relationship, where we speak honestly, acknowledge mistakes or at the very least hurts, and we decide to move forward together. No grudges, no petty come backs, but rather we return to our original stance that this election proved was a winner- acting from our strengths: the grassroot activism of our citizens and the leading by hope that President Obama is so good at. Children are comforted that despite ups and downs, tears and time-outs, their parents remain available and accepting. Lovers realize that unconditional love describes the ability to forgive and reconcile, not the ability to avoid conflict and hurt feelings. People say that challenges teach us the most about ourselves. I say that healing teaches us the most about being better than ourselves. To heal is to grow, even if we were the ones to cause the hurt in the first place.
My wish for this administration is that it have the ability to bring about Restorative Justice- whether the world or the new administration erred, whether we as a country become distracted by the next shiny thing or hate finds another way to manifest itself. In America, all things are possible. I believe that. The world believes that. My hope lies in what is next for America. In America, we can achieve Reconciliation. Yes We Can.
And now I think I've worn this metaphor out.
“Cowardice asks the question, 'Is it safe?'
Expediency asks the question, 'Is it politic?'
Vanity asks the question, 'Is it popular?'
But conscience asks the question, 'Is it right?'
And there comes a time when one must take a position
that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular
but because conscience tells one it is right.”
---Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
Thanks Tavis Smiley for reminding your viewers of this speech!
Watching the election results from California was painful. So much suspense. So much agony. And then? Ecstasy. Watching the crowds at Grant Park, I decided that I am going to try to be in Washington DC for inauguration day. Anyone got good hotel recommendations?
The best part of the night, for me, was when Obama started telling us what to do. He was calm, inspiring, and a little bit firm. We are to be congratulated. We are to stay positive. We are to be humble. We are to start working together. Implicit in that admonishment was "No Gloating." I sighed with relief. If America has been looking for a new Daddy, I think we got one who will give us some respect, some structure and some responsibilities. It was a nightmare being "parented" by a man we did not respect, an administration that ruled through fear and ridicule, alternating with a hefty dose of neglect, stuffing us with bread and circuses, so that we would ignore our own feelings of impotence and helplessness, and finally giving the silent treatment to those who did speak out.
Since I am a family therapist and am on a roll with this child rearing metaphor, let me warn that now, now comes the testing. Joe Biden was right. He was ridiculed, but he was right. America won't rest, the world won't rest, until we make absolutely sure that the new administration will retain its hopeful, inclusive and disciplined stance towards us and our global siblings, no matter what happens, no matter what people do.
Now, before I get too carried away with my "America as Family" description, I know that *President Obama* (eee! It looks so nice all typed out!) is not perfect. He will lose his cool and he will become, at times, too detached. Perhaps his measured approach to problems will cause us to miss critical opportunities or bungle challenges due to timing. It is most certain that President Obama's desire to find the common ground between opponents and to devise a compromise between them will, at times, leave everyone dissatisfied at some point. We will be disappointed when the President fails to live up to our expectations, when the problems that have taken years to ripen take years to die. When the very nature of expedient politics is to gamble with the rights of the individual in order to bring about the public good, our new President may be tempted and sometimes fall. The world will soon get impatient with us, having seen that America is full of potential, but we that we remain teenagers- with all the narcissistic idealism and self righteous aggression that goes with adolescence.
But the strength of a family is shown during the repairitive phase of a relationship, where we speak honestly, acknowledge mistakes or at the very least hurts, and we decide to move forward together. No grudges, no petty come backs, but rather we return to our original stance that this election proved was a winner- acting from our strengths: the grassroot activism of our citizens and the leading by hope that President Obama is so good at. Children are comforted that despite ups and downs, tears and time-outs, their parents remain available and accepting. Lovers realize that unconditional love describes the ability to forgive and reconcile, not the ability to avoid conflict and hurt feelings. People say that challenges teach us the most about ourselves. I say that healing teaches us the most about being better than ourselves. To heal is to grow, even if we were the ones to cause the hurt in the first place.
My wish for this administration is that it have the ability to bring about Restorative Justice- whether the world or the new administration erred, whether we as a country become distracted by the next shiny thing or hate finds another way to manifest itself. In America, all things are possible. I believe that. The world believes that. My hope lies in what is next for America. In America, we can achieve Reconciliation. Yes We Can.
And now I think I've worn this metaphor out.
“Cowardice asks the question, 'Is it safe?'
Expediency asks the question, 'Is it politic?'
Vanity asks the question, 'Is it popular?'
But conscience asks the question, 'Is it right?'
And there comes a time when one must take a position
that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular
but because conscience tells one it is right.”
---Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
Thanks Tavis Smiley for reminding your viewers of this speech!