Excerpt from OO
There is one man I revile above all others. I hate him more than the whiny rich kids on Laguna Beach, more than the dancing idiots in the Old Navy commercials, more than Paris Hilton. Well, that might be taking it a bit too far, but I really despise this man. His name? Ernest Hemingway.
I was first introduced to old Ernie in 10th grade Advanced English when he tortured me with 150 pages about a fish. I don’t like fish. I didn’t particularly want to read an entire book about one. And the whole epic Christ struggle metaphor- complete baloney.
Unfortunately, it didn’t stop there. The next year, I am subjected to 300 pages about a depressed soldier named Frederic. Somehow, I don’t think the author’s exactly doing his job of making his main character sympathetic when I’m cheering on the other side. “Cmon Germans, shoot him!!! He’s right there, and he’s got a limp. Easy target! Please, put him out of his misery; I can’t bear to listen to him anymore!!” And they never did kill him. Pity.
I was first introduced to old Ernie in 10th grade Advanced English when he tortured me with 150 pages about a fish. I don’t like fish. I didn’t particularly want to read an entire book about one. And the whole epic Christ struggle metaphor- complete baloney.
Unfortunately, it didn’t stop there. The next year, I am subjected to 300 pages about a depressed soldier named Frederic. Somehow, I don’t think the author’s exactly doing his job of making his main character sympathetic when I’m cheering on the other side. “Cmon Germans, shoot him!!! He’s right there, and he’s got a limp. Easy target! Please, put him out of his misery; I can’t bear to listen to him anymore!!” And they never did kill him. Pity.