Nov 08, 2004 04:34
I have been in the absolute worst mood ever for the past week... especially because of this weekend. And I have to say I have amazing friends here at school. It's awesome to know that there are people here who have only met me about 2 and a half months ago who would drop everything they were doing to simply come give me a hug. People who will sit and just listen to me when I need to talk. It's awesome how much I hear people say how amazing of a person I am... because for a while I doubted who I was. It's easier to believe the negative before you are willing to embrace the positive... and I think simply being at AU has made me like myself more. Hehe! :)
But anyway... after being at the pinnacle of upset for the past 24 hours, I needed some way to get myself to smile again. Seriously, I was scaring the crap out of some of my friends here... they've never seen me this upset before. So... I spent most of today watching season one of Gilmore Girls (thanks, Paul). I kept falling asleep... Paul came in at one point and rubbed my back for me. :) I love Paul. Eventually, Andrew and Jen came to my room and ordered pizza and watched Gilmore Girls with me. And... I love cuddling with Andrew! Haha! And I forgot about things for a while... ok no that's a lie... I just kind of took them out of focus and was more worried about what was going to happen to Lorelei and Rori. But... I found myself being upset once I was alone again.
I decided to away message stalk people like I normally do when I'm bored or just need something to occupy my time. And... Rachel saw my a/m saying I was upset and had imed me... so we started talking. Then she called me and we just talked for about and hour and a half... which was all we were allowed because her phone was dying! Haha! I killed it! I just absolutely love Rachel. She's the kind of person that I can go forever without talking to and then suddenly we get back in touch and it's like we never drifted. Plus it's different talking to her than trying to talk to friends here because she went to hs with me (even though she was a senior my frosh year) and she knows what it's like at home and stuff like that. And... we're gonna get together probably next week and do lunch or dinner or something... so I'm really excited for that!
But yea... it's 5 am... and I feel a little bit better :)
xoxo
Mel
(Yellow)