FAGGOT!
excuse the following "strem of conciousness"
ok so, why cant he just be honest? i mean he already told me he just thinks shes pretty....whats the point? sheesh, and then he says he'll call me later...ok....whatev...and i guess other people have drama too, but does she? i think i will always be in someone else's shadow...will i always be this unhappy with myself? i sure hope not...maybe thats why i want that one special person so bad...because then if my friends are being stupid or something i can just hang with him and he'll make me feel better...is that guy even out there for me? i mean seriously...is there really ONE person for every person? Does everyone have someone? And what was last night about anyway? Seriously...what was i thinking? i really hope i wont become a drunk slut in college....you laugh now, but just wait...someones going to have to hit me in the stomack hard one day....lord, i freaking shouldnt have called him? why dont i listen to my first hunch?! but then again, what do you do when you regret it either way? OMG! this is hard stuff....i cant even fathom real life is this is high school...i hope i make it through, i mean ive made it this far...maybe the rapture should just come...